Robyn Carr - The Newcomer

“It would probably be best if you just turned the phone off,” Gina said. “If he calls you, let him find you’re over him!”

“I’m so not over him,” she said.

“This can’t go on, Ash,” she said. “You have to get a grip. You have to get up, get cleaned up, go to school.”

“You have no idea what you’re saying,” she cried.

“Don’t I? Ashley, my boyfriend left me pregnant at fifteen. When I told him, he ran far and fast and never looked back! Ashley, I know how this hurts, believe me.”

She rolled over, her red hair everywhere, and tearfully said, “I wouldn’t mind that, you know. At least you still had a part of him to live for. What do I have?”

Gina wanted to shake her. “Your dignity! He cheated on you—you should kick him to the curb, not suffer in rejection. Get mad! I hope the sorry bastard gets a disease!”

“Mama,” she cried, fresh tears spilling all over her face. “Don’t say that, Mama. You love Downy. And my heart hurts....”

She didn’t love Downy anymore. How could he take her little girl’s innocence and then dismiss her so cruelly? Describe her as “the girl I dated back home” like she was history? He should be brutally punished. How could he?

Because he’s an eighteen-year-old boy, her wiser self said. He did what most eighteen-year-old boys do. And Ash is just a sixteen-year-old girl, doing what comes naturally—grieving her loss. It could just as easily have gone the other way—Ashley could have become bored with her absent boyfriend and found someone new at school, some current popular jock who had time to date, to take her to the dances and games. This could be Downy wallowing in depression because his girlfriend had dumped him.

Why couldn’t it be that way, huh? she asked herself. She didn’t want her daughter to be mean and insensitive, but she also didn’t want this—this sobbing, broken mess who wouldn’t get out of bed.

“I’m going back to work,” she said. “When I get home later I want you up. I want you showered, doing your best to get on with life because you can’t fix this, Ashley. I’m not going to let you shrivel up and waste away just because Downy was an unfaithful ass. Do you hear me? Tomorrow you go to school, no excuses.”

She rolled over and looked at her through wet eyes. “I loved him,” she whispered. “I loved him so much.”

“But you can’t make a person love you back,” Gina whispered.

“Are you sure? Because somehow I made him love me once.”

Gina smoothed her crazy red hair back off her brow. “I know, baby. Someday you’re going to understand that you dodged a bullet here. You don’t want a boyfriend who can’t be faithful, who can’t keep his promises. Believe me.”

Ashley just shook her head. She rolled over and, gripping her phone, as she had been for days, she gently wept.

Gina got away from the house. She walked down the hill to the diner before pulling out her own phone. She stared at it for a moment. She sat down on one of the benches outside the diner’s front door and clicked on Marjorie Downy’s number. When the woman answered she said, “Marjorie, hi. It’s Gina James.”

“Hi there, Gina.”

“I wonder if you know—Downy and Ashley broke up.”

There was a heavy sigh from Marjorie. “I did hear that. I can’t say I’m surprised. I thought that when they were apart for a while, at different schools, it might end up like this. That’s too bad for Ashley, Gina.”

“She’s devastated. She said Downy has a new girlfriend.”

Marjorie sighed again. “Well, look, Crawford is in a new place now, a different place. Their worlds...you know what I mean. Their worlds are now orbiting different suns. There’s college and there’s high school.”

“He promised to take her to her prom,” Gina said because she just couldn’t help it, though she didn’t have any intention of Marjorie helping with that problem.

“I know. I have to be honest with you, Gina—I never approved of that idea. Crawford should be spending what little money he has for dating on college events, fraternity events, not on high school dances.”

Gina stiffened. “Well, then, perhaps he shouldn’t have promised,” she said. “Poor Ashley.”

“Oh, Gina, I do feel sorry for Ashley, I do. I’m sure she’ll be all right.”

“She’s not all right at the moment. She’s shattered. Heartbroken. Downy wasn’t very nice to her.”

“Poor thing. But I worried about this from the start. Crawford is quite the catch at State—handsome, athletic, fun, smart. I knew it was only a matter of time before some pretty college girl caused him to forget the girl back home. Ashley really shouldn’t have pinned her hopes on him.”

Gina felt her heart squeeze. “Maybe not,” she said weakly. For a moment she felt as though she should have found a way to prevent this romance, a way to keep Ashley from being hurt.

“Despite what Crawford and Ashley might’ve thought, I knew this wasn’t a lasting thing. The age difference...”

“But Downy told me you knew they were sexually active. Involved. Committed.”

“I found packages of condoms. It broke my heart. I was extremely disappointed by that. In my day young ladies were much more cautious with their bodies, with their virtue.”

Gina’s eyes grew round and her neck nearly snapped from straightening so fast. She was instantly on her feet. “And in your day, were young men also cautious?”

Marjorie actually laughed. “I wish I could say they were. You’d understand if you were the mother of sons. Boys—a different animal entirely. Which is why it’s important to raise young ladies with strict standards. You know what I mean, Gina.”

She hoped she wouldn’t break a molar, clenching her teeth so hard. “I’m sure I have no idea what you mean.”

“I mean that invariably it’s up to the girl.”

Gina was speechless. “You’re not serious,” she finally said.

“I couldn’t be more serious!” Marjorie insisted. “Men are men—they’re single-minded and a little crazy. But my boys were raised proper—if the girl says no, the answer is no. They’re not villains, they’re just men.”

“You really can’t believe this,” Gina said.

“Gina, perhaps Ashley thought there wouldn’t be any consequences for having sexual relations at the tender age of sixteen. And as you can see from your poor darling’s broken heart, having a baby out of wedlock isn’t the only consequence.”

Gina felt her face burn. “You didn’t just say that to me,” she said. “You didn’t.”

“Oh, Gina, please! I meant no offense, it’s just that—”

“Is that what you teach your sons, Marjorie? That if they can pressure a girl into giving it up, all’s fair? It’s not the boy’s fault or responsibility?”

“No! Oh, God, no!” Then she was quiet for a second before she muttered, “I wouldn’t teach them such a thing. I’m not surprised that they think that way, however. I live in a house full of males. For all I know, my husband could have conveyed the message.”

“If he did, he should be hung up by his balls!” Gina snapped, disconnecting the call. She sank to the bench once more. She leaned over, elbows on her knees, her head resting in her hands. She couldn’t believe comments like that could still be so painful. And she knew that wasn’t how she was commonly regarded in this town—the unwed mother. She knew she and her mother were both respected citizens here. Ashley, a lovely girl and good student, was thought of highly.

But there were still a few, like Marjorie, who put it all on the woman. As if a girl gets pregnant all alone.

For a moment, she felt hot and damp at the same time. Mortified. Humiliated, as if it had been yesterday that she’d said to Carrie, Oh, Mama, I’m pregnant! And I don’t know what to do!