Vicki Thompson - Should've Been A Cowboy & Cowboy Up - Should've Been a Cowboy / Cowboy Up

She couldn’t really say why she was feeling so emotional. Babies were fine for Morgan and Josie, but Tyler wasn’t into them, at least not at this point in her life. Babies equaled the loss of freedom to pursue work that she loved.

She understood there were trade-offs, but she wasn’t interested in hearing about them right now. If she were totally honest with herself, she’d admit that listening to a woman rhapsodize about the joys of marriage and children might interfere with her enjoyment of the single life and her career success.

Maybe a part of her envied the spontaneous joy generated by Josie and Jack’s announcement. The ship’s crew celebrated things, too, but it was...different. The emotions around this table ran far deeper. She hadn’t realized until now what she was missing, yet she wasn’t willing to give up a dynamite career for that kind of connection. Or was she?

In the chaos surrounding Josie’s announcement, Tyler was surprised to hear Alex’s voice speaking her name. She turned to find him crouched beside her chair, his expression worried.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “You look a little pale.”

She met his gaze. “Do you know where this Shoshone sacred site is located?”

“Yeah, I’ve been out there a couple of times.”

She guessed that he’d gone because he needed to sort through his thoughts about Crystal. She decided not to ask. “Do you know if it’s still raining?”

“No, but it was letting up about the time we came in. Why?”

“Because I’d like to go out there.” She’d been so sure of what she wanted, and now doubts pelted her like hail. Her big promotion was within reach. She could always settle down later after she’d enjoyed that promotion for a few years. But it wouldn’t be with Alex, and it wouldn’t involve this family.

“Now?”

“Right now, if that’s at all possible. Will that look too crazy?”

Alex stood. “I don’t care if it looks crazy or not. If you want to go, we’ll go. Let me get the keys to one of the ranch trucks.”

She liked that he fell in with her gonzo plan so easily. Not all guys would. She liked many things about Alex, in fact. Too many things. The sacred site was supposed to give a person clarity. She desperately needed that.

Chapter Seven

Twenty minutes later, Alex was at the wheel of one of the older ranch trucks, with Tyler belted into the passenger seat beside him as they bounced down a rutted road toward the sacred Shoshone site. Tyler had gone up to her room for a dark green hoodie, and he’d grabbed his denim jacket from the closet and an old blanket from the top shelf.

The night was cool, so he kept the windows rolled up on the truck. After the rain it wouldn’t be particularly cozy on the granite, either, but he’d do what he could to compensate. He’d so hoped for an innerspring mattress tonight, but it didn’t seem to be in the cards.

“By coming out here, I think we’ve tipped our hand,” Tyler said. “Everybody must have guessed that we’re...temporarily together.”

“Oh, well.”

“I just had to get out of there for a while.”

Alex wasn’t sure what was bothering her, but he had some ideas. “You looked a little freaked out after Josie made her announcement.”

“I was, and I’m still trying to figure that out. You looked really happy, though.”

“I was. This will be great for her and Jack, and Sarah’s going to be in hog heaven with two grandchildren to run after. Plus, the kids will be close in age, so they can grow up together. It’s nice for everyone concerned.”

Tyler groaned. “Stop the truck.”

He slammed on the brake. “Are you sick?”

“Not physically. I’m sick with guilt. Talk about self-centered! I dragged you out here when you should be back there celebrating with everyone. Please turn around and go back. I’m so, so sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Alex took his foot off the brake and put it back on the gas. “I’d rather be out here with you.”

“That’s nice of you to say, but you’re missing the festivities. I’ll bet they moved the party into the living room and lit a fire. They’re toasting those two babies, and you’ll be the proud uncle of one and probably the adopted uncle of the other one. You should be there with Josie.”

“She doesn’t need me there. She has Jack.”

“I should be there with Morgan.”

Alex sighed. “That makes no real sense. You saw how Josie and Morgan instantly went into a huddle to discuss diet and exercise programs, and whether Josie can fit into some of Morgan’s early maternity clothes.”

“Yeah, I did. And that’s great. They’ll be a terrific support system for each other.”

“Feeling like an outsider?”

She leaned her head against the back of the worn cloth seat. “Yeah, I guess I am. Maybe that’s part of it. But to be an insider, I’d have to marry somebody and get pregnant right away. I won’t do that, of course, but the power of suggestion is a scary thing.”

Alex watched the road for critters. Back in Chicago he’d had to worry about other drivers. Out here he had to worry about hitting a raccoon or a skunk. “I suppose there is a lot of home-and-hearth sentiment swirling around the Last Chance right now.”

“Which is so not me.”

“I get that, Tyler.”

“I know you do, which is one of the reasons I asked you to bring me out here. You may be the only person from that dinner-table crowd who truly understands that I’m not ready for a husband and kids. Morgan says she understands, but I can see in her eyes that she’d love to have me find a guy and settle down, maybe even in Jackson Hole.”

“That’s natural. I’m sure she misses you when you’re gone for long stretches.” He didn’t want to imagine what his life would be like after she left, either. He was afraid the joy would leach right out of his days and nights.

“And I miss her, too, but that’s the nature of the job. On the upside, I get to see amazing places all over the world, and the passengers are terrific, for the most part. Many of them have invited me to visit, and I’m sure their homes are gorgeous. You couldn’t afford this type of luxury cruise if you didn’t have plenty of money.”

“Do you think you will visit them?”

“Probably not. The little time I have off I’ll want to spend with family. Morgan’s the first one to establish an actual home somewhere, but I’ll bet the others will, too, eventually.”

“And your parents? Will they finally stay put somewhere?”

Tyler chuckled. “I doubt it. I picture them waiting until we all have places of our own, and then they’ll make the rounds. I’ve figured out that my dad is ADD. He can’t stick with one job or one place for more than a month or two before he gets bored. I inherited the wanderlust, but I’ve been able to keep this job for almost six years. And I love it. It’s perfect for me.”

“I’m sure it is.” And yet...now he wasn’t so sure. She kept saying how much she loved her lifestyle, almost as if she needed to keep repeating her dedication to the job to ward off any change to the plan. Or maybe that was wishful thinking on his part.

Tyler peered out the window. “It’s very dark out here, isn’t it?”

“Especially tonight, with all the clouds. I’m afraid you won’t see the moon glittering on the quartz unless I use a flashlight.”

“You have one, though, right?”

“There should be one in the glove compartment.”

As she reached to open it, he remembered what else was in there. She’d waited on the porch while he’d brought the truck around, and he’d used that opportunity to shove a handful of condoms into the glove compartment. A handful was excessive, but he hadn’t had time to figure out how many he might need, so he’d just grabbed some.