Patricia Davids - Shelter From The Storm

No, she was being childish again. Just because he hadn’t been blinded by her charms last year was no reason for unkind thoughts about him. Jesse was a quiet man and there wasn’t anything wrong with that. He was about the only man she knew who didn’t have a hidden motive.

Robert Fisher, her former boyfriend had been a handsome smooth-talking flirt. She had been a naive, easy target for him. His attentions soothed her wounded pride and made her feel beautiful and loved. Except it was all a lie. He seduced her and left town the day after she told him she was pregnant. Like a fool, she had waited for him to return. It took months for her to accept that he wasn’t coming back. It was a lesson she took to heart. He was the last man she would trust unconditionally.

Returning home was hard. She had already been baptized into the Amish faith. She would be shunned when the bishop learned of her condition, but that wasn’t as frightening as having a baby alone. She wouldn’t be able to eat at the same table as her parents and they wouldn’t be able to accept anything from her hand. She wouldn’t be included in church activities for as long as her shunning went on. She was prepared for that. She fully intended to confess and ask forgiveness and pray the bishop chose a short period of shunning for her to endure.

Jesse held out a motel key. “I got you a room. Number eight. I’ll take your suitcase.” One arched eyebrow dared her to reject his offer.

“Danki,” she murmured.

Dale glanced between the two of them. “Have you eaten, miss?”

She raised the white paper bag. “I have my supper.”

“Goot.” Jesse walked toward the motel, carrying her suitcase as easily as if it were empty instead of packed full of all she owned.

She nodded to Dale. “I’m grateful for the lift home.”

“My pleasure. It’s a long trip, and I sure will enjoy having someone to talk to for a change. Jesse don’t say much.”

“I know.” She followed Jesse to the room at the very end of a motel that had seen better days. The Gray Goose Inn’s paint was peeling in multiple spots and the windows were dingy. The sidewalk along the front was cracked and lifted while the neon light on the sign out front flickered dimly.

He held open the door and set her suitcase inside. “We’ll leave at six.”

“I’ll be ready.” She swallowed her false pride and stared at her fingers clenched around her purse handle. “ Danki , Jesse. This is generous of you. I will repay you, I promise.”

“It’s nothing. Why come back? Your daed says you like it in Florida.”

Had Jesse asked about her? She found that hard to believe. “I do, but I got homesick.”

As soon as she said the words, she realized they were true. She missed her parents and her friends, even if they didn’t miss her.

Bethany, Gemma’s closest friend, had married last winter and all she talked about was how happy she and Michael were and how blessed she was to have found the man God had intended to be her husband. Gemma’s first cousin Anna Miller was the same way. She and her new husband, Tobias, had arrived in New Covenant a few weeks after Bethany’s wedding. The two women had nothing on their minds except setting up house and starting a family. Two more young married couples moved to New Covenant at the same time. The women all enjoyed one another’s company and often visited between houses. Gemma was the only single woman among them.

Gemma had been happy for her friends, but it hadn’t taken long to realize she’d become a third wheel. The sad odd person out with no one of her own. Without the prospect of marriage and the memory of making a fool of herself over Jesse popping up each time she saw him, Gemma decided to escape to the Amish settlement in sunny Pinecrest, Florida, to find her own soul mate. What a mistake that had turned out to be. A shudder coursed through her at the memory of her betrayal by the man she had met down there who claimed to love her.

“Are you back for good?” Jesse asked. Was there a hopeful note in his voice? She glanced at his face. His grim expression said she must have been mistaken.

She looked down and shrugged. “I haven’t decided.”

Her lower lip quivered. The council of her mother was what she wanted and needed, even as she dreaded revealing her condition. She had no idea what she was going to do about the baby.

Jesse stood as if waiting for something else. She glanced at his face again and caught a look of tenderness before it disappeared. His usual blank expression took its place. Underneath his brawny build and his reclusive nature, Jesse had a soft heart. While he avoided the company of most people, he was known for taking in wounded creatures and strays. Was that how he saw her now? If so, he was more astute than she gave him credit for. She glanced down to make sure her full cloak hid her figure. “Thank you again for your kindness.”

“The bishop would expect it of me. Gemma, is something wrong?”

She couldn’t look at him. “I’m tired, that’s all.”

“Then I’ll say good-night.”

Unable to reply, she went inside, dropped her cold supper in the trash and closed the door, shutting out his overwhelming presence and her irrational desire to bury her face against his chest and give in to her tears.

* * *

It was still dark when Gemma left the motel room a few minutes before six o’clock the next morning, pulling her suitcase behind her. She could see her breath in the chilly air. Snowflakes drifted gently down from the overcast sky. Winter was tightening its grip on the countryside. The contrast between the sandy beach and ocean waves where she had been three days ago caused her to shiver. Had she been foolish to come back? Maybe.

She had her emotions well under control for the moment. A good night’s sleep had erased the ravages of the tears she’d cried into her pillow after Jesse left her. Washing her face with cold water had removed the last bit of puffiness from around her eyes. She was ready to face a few hours in Jesse’s company.

He was standing beside Dale’s battered yellow pickup waiting for her. Without a word, he took her bag and stowed it in the bed of the truck and held the door open for her. She got in. He climbed in after her, taking up more than his share of the bench seat. She scooted farther away.

Dale got in and handed her two white paper bags identical to the one the bus agent had given her. “I got some breakfast burritos for us to eat on the road.” The aroma of toasted tortillas, sausage, grilled peppers and onions filled the air in the small cab, making her stomach rumble ominously. Her morning sickness was more like any-time-of-the-day sickness. It struck without warning. She handed one of the bags to Jesse and swallowed hard, hoping she wouldn’t get sick.

Dale kept up a steady line of chatter as he drove northward on the highway. Jesse ate his meal in silence. He took a swig from a bottle of water, recapped it and put it back in the bag. “Aren’t you going to eat yours?” Jesse nodded toward the paper sack on her lap.

“I’m not hungry. You are welcome to it.”

“Danki.” He took the offered bag and finished off her burrito.

Dale chuckled. “He’s a big man with a big appetite. It must cost a fortune to keep him fed. No wonder he hasn’t found a wife. The poor woman would never get out of the kitchen.”

The heat of a blush rose up her neck and across her cheeks. She cast a covert glance at Jesse. He was staring straight ahead. A muscle twitched in his clenched jaw. He hadn’t forgotten their last conversation.

After weeks of dropping hints about her feelings for Jesse and her desire to get married, she had finally confronted him point-blank and proposed marriage with disastrous consequences. He’d laughed at her and told her to go home. She had countered by confessing her love and throwing herself into his arms. He’d abruptly put her aside. The scowl on his face and his words still echoed in her mind.