Lorna Cook - The Forbidden Promise

‘Is there someone there?’ he shouted from the water.

Constance’s chest tightened as she inhaled sharply.

He repeated himself and then, sounding nervous, added, ‘Come out. Show yourself.’

She was trapped. She couldn’t stay here all day hiding in a cowardly fashion but likewise couldn’t just spring out. She stalled, thinking.

‘I swear to God if there’s someone there …’ he called loudly, aiming for threatening, Constance was sure.

‘I …’ Constance called but further words failed her. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Yes, it’s me. I’m here.’

There was no reply. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t see him naked again, she just couldn’t. The embarrassment of it. Her fingernails dug further into the trunk and she stared straight ahead into the forest. The pine trees swayed of their natural accord but she was almost unseeing of anything around her. What was he doing?

The answer became clear as the pilot appeared suddenly in front of her. He’d put his trousers back on but they clung damply and tightly to his skin.

‘What are you doing here? Why have you come back? Are you on your own?’ He looked around nervously, firing questions at her like bullets. His dark hair fell over his face; his eyelashes still held droplets of water, framing his light green eyes.

‘Yes,’ she almost stuttered, shocked that he had sprung at her so quickly. ‘I’m alone.’

He was so close she could feel the heat from his body. He stepped back. ‘I apologise,’ he said. ‘I was worried you’d brought someone.’

‘Why would I?’ Constance asked.

‘To take me in, of course.’

‘I wouldn’t do that.’

The statement hung in the air between them.

He frowned, inching a fraction towards her. He pushed his brown hair back from his face and water ran down his neck. ‘Why wouldn’t you?’ he asked.

‘I don’t know,’ she said quietly. Although she did know. He’d seemed so fragile of mind, so bewildered, so shocked by his ordeal last night. He’d talked nonsense of running from his duties. Perhaps he just needed time. And if so, she could give him that. Time was something she had plenty of.

Constance stood by the tree. She’d removed her splayed hands from the trunk but resisted the urge to pick the pieces of bark from underneath her nails for fear he would see how tightly she’d been gripping the tree; that she’d been so incredibly nervous she’d been clinging to it. Did he think she’d been watching him? She hadn’t. She’d turned away almost the very moment she’d realised he was naked.

‘Thank you for looking after me last night,’ he said, bringing her back from her thoughts.

‘It was a pleasure.’ She had resorted to formality and tried to rescue herself.

‘Why did you come back?’ he questioned.

Constance thought. ‘I wanted to check you were all right. I wanted to check you hadn’t gone. I didn’t want you to have gone,’ she confessed and then could have bitten her own tongue off to stop herself from talking.

He narrowed his eyes. ‘Why ever not?’

‘Because, you’re shocked, I think. A sort of shell shock from the crash. And you’ve not eaten anything. And you’ve got no money, I assume. Or papers. Where will you go? And although it’s summer, it’s terribly cold at night so you’ll probably freeze to death.’ She knew this last bit wasn’t true but she pressed on regardless. ‘And we’re miles from anywhere—’

‘Which will probably work in my favour,’ he interrupted.

‘Well, no,’ Constance said. ‘I don’t think it would. There’s Invermoray village a few miles down the road but that’s it. What will you do? Hide out in a village for the remainder of the war? A stranger of fighting age suddenly turning up in a Highland village would be hard to overlook. Or were you hoping for a passing car to catch you on the road somewhere? I warn you, there are almost no cars at the moment, and anyone official passing will want to see your papers. Most of the Highlands have been cordoned off. We can’t go anywhere without being stopped in our tracks by the army these days. There are so many houses being requisitioned up here and heaven knows what’s happening, but it’s all terribly hush-hush. So you won’t get very far on foot. I could lend you my bicycle but the same problem applies. You’ll be stopped. You could always wait for the bus,’ she said, ‘which is unpredictable in its timing at best. But for that you’ll need money. Do you have any?’

The corners of his mouth twitched. ‘Well, I must say, you’ve thought about this a great deal more than I have.’

‘I’ve been thinking about you all night,’ she said and then screamed at herself inside her own head.

‘Have you now?’ he asked. An eyebrow lifted and the smile deepened.

‘Not like that,’ she flustered and she faced the humiliation of watching him laugh at her.

‘Well I should hope not,’ he said, teasingly. ‘A nice girl like you.’

She flushed. ‘I felt horribly guilty,’ she said quietly. ‘That I’d just left you. That I’d abandoned you.’

He tilted his head to one side. ‘I shouldn’t have asked you to help me,’ he said seriously. ‘It was unfair. Perhaps you’re right.’ He raked his hand through his wet hair, sending droplets of water flying. ‘Perhaps it was the shock. I wasn’t thinking straight, asking a young woman to go out of her way to house a man who, well, who shouldn’t really be here.’

‘I don’t mind, not now, not now that I’ve thought about it. And I have, a great deal. You should stay at the cottage. Stay as long as you like, as long as you need. There’s plenty of clothes and I’ll bring you food from the house.’

A snapping sound emanated from far behind him and Constance started. Matthew swung round. ‘What was that?’ he said quickly.

‘I think just a doe or a stag perhaps. Since the ghillie left to fight they’ve been allowed to repopulate in droves. Father’s done nothing about culling their numbers,’ she babbled.

He continued staring into the depths of the forest as if he didn’t trust her appraisal of the situation. When he turned back his jaw was set. He breathed deeply.

‘If you mean what you say … if I can stay at the cottage, just for a while, then yes, I’m very grateful indeed that you’re helping me. Completely indebted in fact.’

His smile disarmed her and she struggled to gather her thoughts, looking at the ground, as they walked back to the cottage.

‘Stay,’ she said softly, her eyes still cast down. ‘I promise I won’t tell anyone and I promise faithfully I’ll keep you safe. Stay until you come to a decision. Until you feel ready to hand yourself in or return to your squadron or …’

‘Do you really mean it? You promise not to tell a soul?’

Constance nodded.

‘Thank you,’ he said as they arrived at the cottage door. He held it open for her. ‘It’s not as simple as you think. It’s not that I won’t return to my squadron. It’s that I can’t.’