Sue Moorcroft - A Summer to Remember

‘Yup,’ she answered flatly, putting down her wine glass to accept Nelson’s panting, pawing expressions of adoration. ‘Amongst other things. Like, whether we’ve got a future.’

Aaron had been about to go and get himself a wine glass but instead he dropped into the chair in surprise at this opening gambit. ‘Where did that come from?’

She sighed, still tousling Nelson’s grey hairy ears. He’d taken up station with his head on her lap and looked well happy with the situation. ‘I’ve been thinking about it ever since Clancy came up with the idea of me moving into the B&B. You were so relieved! You obviously don’t want me to move in with you.’ Her eyes glittered in the fading light.

He put his hand over hers, feeling bad that she’d read him so accurately and it had hurt her. ‘But you love your cottage.’

She shrugged. ‘Does that mean I’m forced to live alone in it for the rest of my life?’

‘Well, no,’ he acknowledged. ‘But we’d never talked about living together and suddenly you were hinting that we should, and as if it would become a permanent thing. Taking such a major step out of expediency, because your cottage needs work—’

‘—is not happening,’ she finished for him, her voice tight with tears, forehead furrowing with misery. She gulped a mouthful of wine.

‘I didn’t put it like that—’

But she wasn’t listening to him, just gazing at the sagging corner of her house as if it held all the answers. ‘We’ve been together a year. To be absolutely clear – do you ever foresee us taking our relationship to the next level?’

‘Hey,’ he said gently, patting the hand that lay unresponsive under his. ‘What’s going on? I feel as if I’ve missed half a conversation.’

‘Do you ever foresee us making our relationship more committed?’ she insisted.

‘I don’t discount it,’ he answered carefully, as she was clearly intent on making him lay all his cards on the table. ‘We’ve had a great relationship and, if you’re asking me to be honest, then I’m happy as we are.’

She turned to face him. ‘Clancy says women shouldn’t be defined by the love of a man, but I’m going to ask you. Do you love me? And yes or no are the only acceptable answers.’

Aaron tried to get a grip on the conversation, which felt as out of control as a kite in a hurricane. He hated upsetting Gen but that familiar prickle of resentment at being made to feel the bad guy was there too. He made his voice gentle. ‘Backing me into a corner isn’t going to help this situation.’

Slowly, her blonde hair lifting on the evening breeze, Genevieve upended the wine bottle over her glass, watching it fill almost to the brim. ‘So that’s a no then.’

‘I didn’t say that!’ He’d never asked himself whether he loved Genevieve, or any past girlfriends. He’d never wanted to settle down before he was thirty and then, when he was exactly that age, what happened to Lee had made him wary. Lee had given his whole heart to Alice and she’d ripped it up and tossed it over her shoulder as she shook the dust of Nelson’s Bar from her feet.

Genevieve went on as if he hadn’t spoken. ‘I feel as if you’ve been playing me along.’

Once more, he was taken aback. ‘I didn’t realise we had different expectations, that’s all.’

‘I’m thirty-four. It didn’t occur to you that I’d want children?’ Her eyes were huge with unshed tears.

He decided there was no right answer to that because it had, in fact, been in the back of his mind, but not in a positive way. ‘I’m sorry you’re upset,’ he said.

‘So am I,’ she responded slowly. ‘I deserve more than a man who neither loves me nor sees a future with me.’ Tears began to leak from the corners of her eyes. ‘I obviously feel more than you and I don’t want to spoil the memories of what we’ve had for the last year. Let’s not bicker or blame. Let’s part as friends, both of us free of unrealistic expectations.’ Then, as Aaron sat, stunned into silence, she gave a half-laugh, half-sob. ‘I think you should go now, before I make a bigger idiot of myself than I already have.’

‘Are you sure this is what you want?’ he asked, rising uncertainly to his feet. Genevieve just looked away and shooed him with a wave of her hand. Aaron had little choice but to click his fingers to Nelson and leave for home, his thoughts circling madly.

How had he just gone from being cautious about his relationship moving too fast to it exploding in his face?

And … how much did he mind?

To: Clancy Moss

From: William Martin

21 May

Dear Clancy,

Just writing to confirm that the company will continue paying you dividends – in the short term – and I’ve today paid what we agreed as rent for your half of the apartment. I’d like to think these financial arrangements are interim. When the dust’s settled we’ll be able to put lasting proposals to you. You’ll probably know more about what you want the future to look like by then too.

Is it possible for you to tell one of us you’re OK? If you feel the need for a complete communication break then we’ll try to understand but we’re concerned. I hope you can take that in the spirit it’s meant.

Will hadn’t signed the email. Clancy supposed he hadn’t known how. Kisses were no longer appropriate and Kind regards plain odd when a few short months ago they’d been deciding the menu for their wedding breakfast. In those days, the apartment had been the settled home she’d waited all her life for. Will was her forever man.

She sat back and sighed, the noise and bustle of a busy Hunstanton café surrounding her. Dilys and Ernie, who’d leapt at the opportunity of grabbing a lift into ‘Hunny’, were running errands while Clancy emailed her parents to update them on the past weeks, though the remote village in Namibia where Brenda and Gerry Moss were working was almost as technology-deprived as Nelson’s Bar. There, all communications were via satellite and easily affected by weather.

Luckily, Clancy’s superpower had always been not needing parental support.

As she’d tried to make good her intention to throw herself into her new life, the week had sped by without her moving out of the village and into a signal or Wi-Fi area. She hadn’t liked to press Aaron about using his satellite broadband, especially when it wasn’t for Roundhouse Row matters. Instead, she’d readied the rentals for occupation, including mowing lawns and tidying borders, and found her feet with the paperwork side of her caretaking duties. She’d also cooked more than she’d had time for in London, and a couple of times invited Dilys and Ernie to share the results.

But now she felt guilty, especially when she thought of those texts from Asila and Tracey, which she’d ignored. She replied to Will quickly, noting his comments on financial arrangements. Then she began another message.

To: Asila Memon, Jon Montagu, Tracey Murland, William Martin

From: Clancy Moss

25 May

Just to let you know I’m OK. I didn’t deliberately blank your texts/emails but I’m staying somewhere that doesn’t have mobile signal or broadband.