Susan Carlisle - A Forever Family - Their Miracle Child

It was all gone. She would never laugh with her sister again. She would never watch David look lovingly at his wife and hear them make plans and talk about their daughter’s education. How Ruby would tell him that the little girl would be brighter than anyone else in the class because he was the father, and how he would say she would be without doubt the prettiest because she would look like her mother.

At times, Jade would tell them they sounded like a bad midday movie but their love for each other had been undeniable and real.

With that in mind, Jade held herself together. She owed it to Ruby and David to be there for their daughter and surround her with the love they would have lavished on her.

And then there was the added burden of guilt that sat heavily on her shoulders. No matter which way Jade looked at the situation, she felt responsible for Amber’s early entry into this world. She had played the scene over and over in her mind since the accident. Why had she booked the holiday for them? If only she hadn’t given them the present of a few days away in Palm Springs, they wouldn’t have been a part of that terrible accident. And Amber would still be safely inside her mother with another ten weeks until her much-anticipated birth.

But instead, Jade was arranging the funeral of Amber’s parents and staying strong for the tiny daughter they would never be able to love. She knew they both had a battle ahead but they would face it together. All they had now in the world was each other.

‘WE ARE NOW commencing our descent into Adelaide. Please ensure your tray table is secured and your seat is in the upright position. We will be landing in fifteen minutes and you will be disembarking at gate twenty-three. Current time in Adelaide is eleven-thirty. Your luggage will be available for collection on Carousel Five. On behalf of the cabin crew, we hope you enjoyed your flight and will fly again with us in the future.’

Jade wound up the cord of her headset before she tucked it away after the flight attendant’s announcement, then, smiling, she looked over at her niece, still sleeping soundly. She looked like a tiny angel. Her little round face was resting in the pillow, her tight, strawberry-blonde curls a little messy, her arm tightly holding her rag doll and her bright blue eyes still hidden from the world. It was the second leg of their travel. The fifteen-hour-long haul from Los Angeles to Sydney had been followed by a shorter flight to Adelaide.

The trip to Australia was not a journey that Jade had wanted to make initially and one that she had been delaying, but she had known it was the right thing to do. David’s mother, Maureen, and stepfather, Arthur, had wanted so much for their granddaughter to spend some time in the town where their son, Amber’s father, had grown up. So here they both were, about to touch down in a city that she remembered from David’s conversations but a place she knew nothing about. Her stomach was churning nervously.

The last time she had seen Maureen and Arthur had been at the funeral almost three years before. It had been a time that Jade would never forget. Despite the overwhelming grief that no one had tried to mask, they’d shown great kindness in allowing David to be buried in Los Angeles with his wife. Jade knew that it would have been reasonable for them to want their son to be buried near them in his home town, but they had all known that David would want to be laid to rest with the woman he’d loved.

And so it was that they’d left their son for ever in a city eight thousand miles from them. It displayed a generosity of spirit, and Jade knew in her heart why David had been such a loving and considerate man. He had been his parents’ son.

They had not visited Los Angeles again after the funeral, but Jade had accepted it would have been too sad to return to the place where their son had died. They had kept in contact with calls and emails and gifts for Amber’s birthday and Christmas. Amber’s birthdays were a bitter-sweet time for everyone as she had been born on the day her parents had both died. An unspoken agreement made them all try to celebrate the beautiful gift they had been given on that fateful day.

Jade felt an empty ache inside for what everyone had lost. Some nights she lay awake with her memories and overwhelming sadness. A trigger such as Amber’s first step, first word, first anything reminded Jade of how Ruby and David should be there to witness their daughter’s milestones. And they weren’t.

Amber never cried; she was too young to know what she was missing, and Jade was determined to devote her life to filling any gaps. Amber would never want for anything in her life. She would never be alone in the world.

As they walked across the air bridge, Jade spied David’s mother and stepfather. Maureen was beaming with excitement, her smile so wide that Jade could see it before she entered the arrival lounge. Arthur’s expression was more stoic, almost stern, but she knew he was a good man and a generous one. Maureen was dressed in a pastel floral summer dress and wore flat gold sandals, her blonde hair cut in a short, modern style. Arthur wore long beige trousers with a navy and cream checked shirt, his hair silver grey. They were a stylishly conservative couple, sharing David’s dress sense, Jade thought.

Holding Amber’s tiny hand in hers, Jade walked up the carpeted incline to where the couple were waiting. Still a little drowsy, Amber was struggling to hold on to her ragdoll, and the soft legs dragged behind them into the terminal.

‘Hello, Maureen,’ Jade said, and kissed the woman’s cheek lightly. Then she greeted Arthur with a kiss to his sun-wrinkled cheek. Jade wondered if it was tennis or golf that had weathered his happy face. Now retired, he had spent his working life as a surgeon so she knew it wasn’t from toiling in the midday sun.

‘Amber, sweetheart, this is Grandma and Grandpa.’

‘Hello, Amber, I hope you both had a good trip,’ Maureen said, directing her comment to Jade as she wrapped her arms around Amber and kissed her ruddy, warm cheek.

‘Hello,’ came Amber’s shy, almost muttered reply. Jade noticed her niece flinch and wriggle before she leant back, wanting to be in her arms. Understanding the little girl’s reticence at being embraced by a woman she didn’t know, Jade gently reached for her.

‘She’s a bit tired,’ she said apologetically, and she lifted the child, who was now looking quite worried, almost teary, into her arms ‘It was a long flight, but I certainly couldn’t complain. It was very generous of you to fly us here first class.’

‘Nonsense, we wouldn’t have it any other way,’ Maureen announced, still stroking the little girl’s arm, and to Jade’s relief not offended by the child’s reaction. ‘Nothing is too good for either of you. You are family and our home is your home for as long as you can stay. I’m hoping you love Adelaide so much you won’t ever leave. We have such a big house all to ourselves.’

Smiling, Arthur rolled his eyes at the complete lack of subtlety in his wife’s announcement, took hold of Jade’s carry-on luggage, and together, the four of them made their way to collect the checked-in luggage.

Jade smiled at the warmth and genuine sentiment in Maureen’s words. But it would never happen. Their lives were in Los Angeles and they were in Adelaide for one month. It was all the leave she could take from Cedars Sinai, where she still worked but now part time. Jade had thought about leaving when Amber had been discharged to her care. She had wondered how she would pull into the car park of the hospital where her sister had passed away. But over time it gave her comfort to know she was where Ruby had spent her last moments of life. And where Amber had taken her first breath.