Kate Hardy - A Forever Family - Their Christmas Delivery

‘Not really,’ she admitted, ‘but I am now.’ She paused. ‘I heard a couple of months back that my ex got married and he’s expecting a baby.’

‘The hardest bit is trying to be happy for them when you’re feeling miserable yourself.’

Her eyes widened. ‘That sounds like experience talking.’

He nodded. And funny how easy it was to talk to her, now he’d started. ‘I split up with my wife last Christmas Eve.’

She winced. ‘There’s never a good time to break up with someone, but Christmas has to be one of the roughest. And the first anniversary’s always a difficult one.’ She squeezed his hand briefly, but it didn’t feel like pity—more like sympathy and as if she’d been there herself, which he knew she had. ‘If it helps to know, it does get easier. I know everyone says that time heals. I’m not sure it does that exactly, but it does help you deal with things a bit better.’

‘I’m not still in love with Kelly,’ he said. ‘I want her to be happy. And I’m OK now about the fact it isn’t going to be with me.’

‘That’s good. It’s the same way I feel about Michael.’

It felt as if there was some subtext going on, but Josh didn’t trust his emotional intelligence enough to try to work it out.

She shook coffee grounds into a cafetière. ‘Milk? Sugar?’

‘Black, no sugar, please,’ he said.

‘Because you’re a medic and you’re used to grabbing coffee as quickly as you can?’ she asked.

‘No. It’s a hangover from my student days,’ he said with a smile. ‘I shared a flat with some guys who weren’t that good with checking that the milk was in date. The third time you make your coffee with milk that’s off, you learn it’s safer to drink your coffee black.’

She smiled back. ‘I knew a few people like that in my student days, too.’

It was so easy to be with Amy, Josh thought. And it felt natural to curl up on the other end of her sofa, nursing a mug of coffee and listening to music while the baby was napping in the Moses basket.

‘So what do you usually do at Christmas?’ she asked.

‘Work,’ he said. ‘It feels fairer to let my colleagues who have kids spend Christmas morning with their family.’

‘That’s nice of you.’

‘Ah, but I get to party at New Year while they have to patch up the drunks,’ he said with a smile, ‘so it works both ways.’

Hope woke then, and started crying softly.

‘I’ll go and heat the milk,’ Amy said.

Josh scooped the baby onto his lap and cuddled her until Amy came back with the milk. ‘My turn to feed her,’ he said.

When the baby had finished, he wrote the time and millilitres on Amy’s chart.

‘So at the moment she’s feeding every two to three hours,’ he said.

‘Which means I’m not going to get a lot of sleep tonight.’ Amy gave a wry smile. ‘It’s just as well I’m not going anywhere tomorrow, or I’d be a zombie.’

The sensible bit of his brain told him to back off and keep his mouth shut. The human side said, ‘We could take shifts with her.’

‘But you’ve been at work today—and I assume from what you said that you’re working tomorrow.’

‘And you’ve been on your own with her today, which pretty much counts as a full-time job,’ Josh pointed out. ‘If we take turns feeding her, we’ll both get a four-or five-hour chunk of sleep.’

‘So, what, you take her next door after the next feed and bring her back?’

‘Or, if you don’t mind me sleeping on your sofa, then we don’t have to move her and risk unsettling her.’

Amy frowned. ‘You can’t possibly sleep on my sofa. It’s way too short for you.’

‘Student doctors learn to sleep on anything and be fully awake within seconds. I’ll be fine,’ he said. ‘Let me go next door and grab my duvet.’

For a moment, he thought she was going to argue with him. But then she smiled, and he could see the relief in her eyes. ‘Thanks. Actually, it’ll be good not having the first night with her completely on my own. I’m paranoid I’m doing everything wrong.’

‘Hey—she’s new at this, too. If you’re doing it wrong, she doesn’t know any better. And she looks pretty content to me, so I’d say you’re doing just fine.’

‘Even when she cried non-stop for thirty minutes this afternoon—cried herself to sleep?’

He winced. ‘That’s tough on you. But don’t blame yourself. She would probably have done exactly the same with me.’ He smiled at her. ‘I’ll be back in a tick.’

CHAPTER THREE

WHAT HAVE I DONE? Amy asked herself as Josh went to collect his duvet.

Two years ago, she’d been in what she’d thought was a secure relationship, trying to start a family. A year ago she’d had a broken relationship, broken dreams and a broken heart. This year, she was on an even keel; but it seemed that she was going to be spending the next week with a man she barely knew and a baby who’d been left on their doorstep. It was an odd version of what she’d wished for.

Josh came back carrying a duvet. She wasn’t sure if she felt more relieved or awkward that he was still fully dressed; clearly he intended to sleep in his ordinary clothes on her sofa. Though she guessed that went with the territory of his job.

He folded the duvet neatly over the back of her sofa. ‘Anything you need me to do?’

‘No. Hope’s milk is on the top shelf of the fridge. But help yourself to anything you want.’

He smiled. ‘Fifteen years ago, that would’ve guaranteed you an empty fridge.’

‘That’s what my colleagues at school say.’ She smiled back. ‘The boys leave crumbs everywhere, and the girls make chocolate mug cakes at three in the morning and leave everything in the sink.’

‘Mug cakes?’ He looked blank.

‘You mix everything together in a mug and then stick it in the microwave. Three minutes later, you have cake,’ she explained. ‘I haven’t actually tried it. But apparently it works perfectly when you really, really want cake at three in the morning.’

‘Three minutes. Hmm. You can make a cheese toastie in that,’ he said.

She smiled. ‘If you get the munchies when it’s your turn to feed Hope, feel free to make yourself a cheese toastie.’

He grinned back. ‘If I do, I promise I’ll clean up the crumbs.’

Almost on cue, Hope woke, wanting milk.

‘I’ll do the next feed,’ Josh said when she’d finished. ‘Go and get some sleep, Amy.’

Once Amy had showered and changed into her pyjamas, she lay awake in the dark, thinking that this was the Christmas she’d never expected. It must be just as weird for Josh, too, spending Christmas with an almost complete stranger—and tough for him, because his wife had left him on Christmas Eve last year and the memories had to hurt. But maybe looking after the baby would help distract him from some of the pain.

Part of her wanted to sleep for eternity, she was so tired—which was ridiculous, because she hadn’t exactly done much all day. But looking after a newborn baby had been fraught with worry that had unexpectedly worn her out. Was she doing the right thing? How would she know if she was getting it wrong? What if the baby was ill and she hadn’t spotted the signs? Or if she made such a mess of changing Hope that the baby ended up with nappy rash—and where would you be able to buy nappy rash cream on Christmas Day, when all the shops were shut?

The worries flickered through her head, stopping her from falling asleep. Part of her wanted to go and check that the baby was OK—but what if she woke Josh? He’d already worked a busy shift today at the hospital. Plus he was used to dealing with babies, and he’d said this was his shift; if he woke and found her checking on the baby, he might think she didn’t trust him. And if that upset him enough to make him walk out on her without really discussing anything, the way Michael had walked out on her, how was she going to cope with the baby all on her own for a week?