Amie Denman - The Firefighter's Vow

“That’s great,” Tony said. “I can see you’re very...” He needed to change the subject before he said something stupid. “Have you talked to your sister about this?”

Laura’s determined and even slightly defiant expression fell, and Tony knew he’d hit a sore spot. He didn’t want to discourage her, but...

He wanted to protect her. That was it. And that was the problem.

“I haven’t,” she said. “Do you ask every volunteer who comes in here if he’s talked to his sister?”

“You’re not every volunteer,” Tony said, his tone soft.

Laura stood. “Can I have an application, please?”

Tony got up quickly. “It’s online. You just fill it out and submit it.”

“And when does training start?”

Laura was dead serious. “Next week. We’re running a six-week intensive summer training.”

“Here at the station?” she asked.

Tony nodded. “And I’m the instructor.”

THE SUNNY MONDAY afternoon was peaceful as Laura and her sister, Nicole, cruised an ocean inlet on their paddleboards. Laura loved the challenge of keeping her balance and getting a good workout, and also spending time with her sister. The steady rhythm of their paddles moving in unison lulled her into believing that finding an even keel was a possibility for her that summer. She’d also decided that balancing over thirty feet of water was a great time to share her firefighting plan with Nicole.

The look her sister gave her did not bode well. Nicole dipped her paddle deep and splashed Laura with ocean water. “That’s not funny,” Nicole said, resting the edge of her paddle between her feet and balancing on the calm water.

“I didn’t mean it as a joke,” Laura protested, mirroring her sister’s movements. “I’m not kidding.”

Nicole held up a finger. “You were supposed to spend the summer with me, have fun, help me with my wedding and take care of Kevin’s dog while we go on our honeymoon. That kind of stuff. You weren’t supposed to show up in town and give me a heart attack.”

“Sorry,” Laura said. “I thought you might understand.”

“Understand?” Nicole asked, raising her voice. “You thought I would understand that my only sister, my only remaining sibling...” her voice softened and trailed off, and Laura instantly felt like a jerk for not realizing just how much of an impact her decision would have on Nicole.

“This is different,” Laura said. “I’m not planning on trying to outrun a forest fire. It’s a nice small fire department. I’ll get plenty of training—probably more than Adam had before he—”

“No,” Nicole said. “I’m learning to live with the fact that Kevin is a firefighter, but I can’t deal with potentially losing you, too.”

Laura began paddling silently alongside her sister, watching for marine life under the calm blue water. She’d paddled back home in rivers, but this was one hundred times more beautiful and interesting.

“How did you learn to accept Kevin’s job?” Laura asked.

“I had to because I love him. I couldn’t make him give up something he loves as the price for being with me.”

It was Laura’s turn to use her paddle to douse her sister with ocean water.

“Hey,” Nicole protested.

“You love me and this is important to me, so what’s the difference?”

“You’re my sister,” Nicole said.

“And?”

Nicole blew out a breath and sat down on her paddleboard. She crossed her legs and laid her paddle across her lap. Laura sat, too, and they let the easy current push them gently around while still staying close to each other.

“Why do you want to do this?” Nicole asked.

Laura trailed a hand in the water. “Because I want to live. And live with myself. I used to believe I could do anything and that anything was possible, but when Adam died, it wrecked my world. You know I was...self-destructive for a while.”

“Are you kidding?” Nicole asked with a sympathetic smile. “I thought the third guy in a row you dated who had a seedy past and a sketchy future was an indication of your excellent judgment.”

“There were only two. And they weren’t all that bad. At least I didn’t think so at the time.”

Nicole nodded. “Of course, I’m getting some of this bias from Mom and Dad who thought you’d quit your teaching job and take off on a motorcycle at any moment. They were worried about you.”

Laura forced a laugh, but her sister’s words hit home. Her parents, hardworking Midwesterners, considered quitting a nice steady job one of the worst things a person could do. She remembered how scandalized they’d been when Nicole quit her job at the furniture factory a year ago and moved to Cape Pursuit to work in a fledgling art gallery. They’d accepted her decision when the move turned out to be a good one, but Laura wasn’t sure they’d see it the same way with her. She was their youngest child now, and she knew they considered her fragile. She would need to prove her strength to them.

“I don’t care for motorcycles,” Laura said. “There’s no good place to put your purse.”

“Seriously,” Nicole said. “Why firefighting? Do you think it’s what Adam would want you to do? Is that why?”

Laura shook her head. “It’s what I want to do. Over the past year, the only times I felt better about myself were the times I was helping someone else. I didn’t feel the anguish or helplessness I felt after Adam’s death while I was being useful volunteering and organizing fundraisers.”

“So you could volunteer at all kinds of things,” Nicole said, excitement in her voice as she latched onto an idea. “We have a library and a summer reading program in Cape Pursuit. You could work at the soup kitchen. You could organize a sock drive for the homeless. Be a blood donor. You could do fifteen dozen things other than be a firefighter.”

“I want to challenge myself,” Laura said. “I helped save some people during a beach rescue last week. It was exhilarating and it made me feel like I could get out of my own way for the first time in a long time. I want to help people when they need it the most.”

She thought of Tony coming through for her at a dark moment a year before. She had almost gotten behind the wheel of her sister’s car after too many drinks to count—her crappiest day in a year full of crappy days. He had rescued her, but she pushed that thought aside whenever it surfaced. Tony wasn’t the person who could save her.

The only person who could save her was herself.

She saw Nicole swipe a tear away. She didn’t want to argue and open a wound that would never be fully healed. They were sisters. They needed and loved each other.

“Anyway,” Laura said as she heaved a big sigh and stood on her board, taking a moment to regain her balance. “I don’t even know if they’ll accept me into the training program. I’m only here for the summer, and they probably have plenty of people with better qualifications than I have.”

Nicole stood on her board and spread her feet carefully, tilting the board side to side and using her paddle as a balance bar until she gained control.

“I don’t think anyone coming into the fire service has better qualifications than you do,” Nicole said. “You’re a superstar teacher, your patience is battle-tested from putting up with teenagers and I think you’re braver than you know.”

“Really?” Laura said hopefully. Did her sister really believe in her?

“Of course,” Nicole said. “You’re here helping me with my wedding, and you’re crazy enough to live in the same house with me as I panic about all the details. Maids of honor should probably get special presidential medals of valor.”