Christine Merrill - A Regency Virgin's Undoing

‘Certainly not.’

‘Or I will continue to help you, if you wish.’ He smiled, thinking that it was unlikely anyone would give him a reference should they find out what had happened and deciding that he did not care one whit who her father was, or what it might do to his career. He would not take back a moment of what had gone on between them.

‘You know that is not what I meant at all,’ she snapped. ‘I would prefer not to feel this way. Certainly not ever again.’

The thought that she would not want to experience unbridled response was disheartening. But by the look in her angry eyes, Lady Drusilla had no real complaints with the way he performed his duties. There was a softness in them that she was trying very hard to hide from him.

‘I feel unsettled. Even, after … the improper thing you just did to me.’ Then she added in a whisper, ‘It is as if I have forgotten to finish a task. And I do not know, for the life of me, what it is.’

If he was not careful, he would have those breeches off her and lay her down in the grass right now to help her remember. He was a careless fool and this had been a mistake. A horrible lapse of judgement. It was the first step on a journey that he would never be allowed to take.

He caught her warm brown eyes with his gaze and held them. ‘I am afraid you are quite as finished as I can allow you to be, Lady Dru. Pleasurable though it would be, I do not dare show you the rest. I apologise for my behaviour,’ he said, taking the burden of the indiscretion upon himself. ‘It will not happen again and we need never speak of it. We will treat it as if it never occurred, if you wish.’

He was backing away from her now and it felt as if he were backing away from the act itself. Do not make me go.

‘Thank you,’ she said, her voice brittle.

‘I had best see to the horses. And you … can take this to prepare a bed.’ He tossed her a blanket from his pack. ‘You will find the hay is quite comfortable. And I will just … The horses …’ And he turned from her, stumbling towards the horses and wading into the icy cold stream.

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