Christy McKellen - Mills & Boon Showcase

She bit down on her lower lip and looked up at Ben, not certain what to do next. How could she tell him she was having cold feet because she was so terrified of hurting him? Could she find the courage to ask him about Jodi?

CHAPTER NINE

TO BEN, SANDY looked as if she’d always stood behind the counter of Bay Books. The short hair he was still getting used to was tucked behind her ears. Just below her left shoulder she had pinned a round metal badge that urged people to get involved with a local literacy campaign. She looked smart, efficient—every inch the professional salesperson. Yet her yellow dress seemed to bring the sunlight right into the corners of the dark wooden carvings so favoured by Aunt Ida, and her vanilla scent brought a sweet new warmth.

She fitted right in.

Ida would be delighted.

But Sandy looked anything but happy—she was wary, guarded, with a shadow behind her eyes. She was chewing her lip so hard she was in danger of drawing blood.

Fear gripped him deep in his gut. What gave here?

‘Hey,’ he said, and went around the counter to pull her into his arms, expecting her warm curves to relax against him. Instead she stiffened and resisted his embrace.

Why the sudden cold change? Hell, he’d worked damn hard to pull down a chink in those barriers he’d built up. Had she now decided to put up a few of her own?

It didn’t figure.

‘What’s going on?’ he asked.

Sandy took a step back, her struggle to decide what to tell him etched on her face. She picked up a waxed paper coffee cup, took a sip. Her hand wasn’t quite steady and the froth on the top wobbled dangerously. She put it down and the foam slid over the lid of the cup and dribbled down its side.

‘Leave it,’ he said as she reached for a cloth to wipe it up.

‘No. It might damage the wood,’ she said.

She cleaned the spill too thoroughly. A delaying tactic if ever he’d seen one.

She put the cloth away, started to speak way too rapidly. ‘Why don’t we take our coffee over to the round table?’ She was gabbling, her eyes blinking rapidly as she looked everywhere but at him. ‘It’s a cosier place to have coffee. Y’know, I’m thinking it would be great for Ida to have a café here. Maybe knock through to the vacant shop next door so that customers—’

She went to pick up the coffee cup again, but he closed his hand around her wrist to stop her. He wouldn’t give her an excuse to evade him. Her hand stilled under his. ‘Tell me. Now.’

Her eyes flickered up to meet his and then back down. When she spoke, her words came out in a rush. ‘Kate told me the whole town is watching to see if I hurt you.’

In his relief, he cursed. ‘Is that all?’ He let go her wrist.

‘What do you mean, is that all?’ Hands on hips, she glared at him with the ferocity of a fluffed-up kitten. ‘Don’t you patronise me, Ben Morgan. Kate really freaked me out.’

He used both hands to push down in a gesture of calm. ‘Kate exaggerates. Kate and the old-school people who were here before Dolphin Bay became a hotspot for escapees from the city. They all mind each other’s business.’

Sandy’s chin tilted upwards. ‘And your business in particular, if Kate’s to be believed.’

He shook his head. ‘It’s no big deal.’

‘Are you telling me that’s part and parcel of living in a small town?’

He picked up his coffee. Drank a few mouthfuls to give him time to think. It was just as he had predicted. Ben’s old girlfriend is back. He could practically hear the hot news humming through cyberspace. ‘Yeah. Better get used to it.’

‘I don’t know if I can.’ Her voice rose to a higher pitch. ‘I’m used to the don’t-give-a-damn attitude of the city.’

Ben thought back to how the town had pulled together for him after the fire. How it had become so stifling he’d had to get away. He’d thrown himself into high-risk money-making ventures because he’d had nothing to lose when he’d already lost everything. They’d paid off in spades. And he’d come back. Dolphin Bay would always be home. No matter that sad memories haunted him at every turn.

But why should that hothouse concern for him bother Sandy?

Her arms were crossed defensively against her chest. Was she using her fear of the townfolk’s gossip to mask some deeper reluctance? Some concern she had about him?

He chose his words carefully. ‘I can see that. But you’re only here for four more days. We’re not thinking beyond that, right? Why worry about what they think?’

‘I just do,’ she said, in a very small voice.

He put down his coffee, put his finger under her chin and tilted it upwards so she was forced to meet his gaze. ‘What else did Kate say?’

‘It wasn’t Kate. There were some other women. Customers. They...they were talking about...about Jodi.’

Pain knifed through him at the sound of Jodi’s name. People tended to avoid saying it in front of him.

His feelings must have shown on his face, because Sandy looked stricken.

‘Ben, I’m so sorry...’

She went to twist away from him, but he stopped her.

‘I should tell you about Jodi.’

The words would be wrenched from him, but he had to tell Sandy about his wife. There should be no secrets between them. Not if they were to enjoy the four days they had together.

‘Ben. No. You don’t have to—’

He gently put his hand over her mouth to silence her and she nodded.

He dropped his hand. ‘I loved Jodi. Don’t ever think otherwise. She was a good wife and a wonderful mother.’

‘Of course.’ Sandy’s eyes were warm with compassion—and a touch of wariness.

‘I’d known her all my life. But I didn’t date her until I’d finished university and was working in Melbourne.’

Sandy’s brows rose. ‘University? You said—’

‘You wouldn’t catch me in a classroom again?’

‘That’s right. You said it more than once. I remember because I was looking forward to going to uni.’

‘You can thank your father for my business degree.’

She frowned. ‘My father? I—’

‘He used to look at me as if I were something scraped off the bottom of his shoe. Left me in no doubt that I wasn’t worthy of his daughter.’ Ben would have liked to apply some apt swear words to his memories of Dr Randall Adams, but Sandy might not appreciate that.

Sandy protested. ‘Surely he didn’t say that to you? I can’t believe he—’

‘He didn’t have to say it. I saw his sneer.’

Her mouth twisted. ‘No wonder I never got your letters.’

Teen testosterone had made him want to flatten the guy. ‘But he had a point. To be worthy of his daughter I needed to get off my surfboard and make something of myself. I had deferred places at universities in both Sydney and Melbourne to choose from.’

‘You never said...’

‘At the time I had no intention of taking either. I just wanted to surf every good break at Big Ray Beach and work for my dad when I needed money to travel to other surf beaches. That summer... I guess it made me grow up.’

He’d been determined to prove Dr Adams wrong. And broadening his horizons had been the right choice, even if made for the wrong reasons. And now fate had brought Sandy back to him. Now they met as equals in every way.

‘You could have been studying at the same uni as me,’ Sandy said slowly. She pulled a face that looked sad rather than funny. ‘I won’t say if only again.’

They both fell silent. But Ben refused to give in to musing about what might have been. He had tortured himself enough.

Sandy cleared her throat. ‘What happened after you finished uni?’

‘I was offered a job in a big stockbroking firm in Melbourne. Got an apartment and stayed down there.’