Debra & Regan Webb & Black - To Honour And To Protect

If Drew Bryant, her favorite soldier, were alive he’d...

Biting her lip, she pulled herself together. If Drew were alive, all of this would be irrelevant. Unnecessary. She, Drew and Andy would be a family, settled in some happy suburb or on farmland far from California. A road trip like this really would be a grand summer adventure. Complete with two drivers and possibly a brother or sister in the backseat with Andy. Even when she and Drew were children themselves, they’d dreamed of having a big family.

If Drew were alive, she wouldn’t have been with Craig at all. It would’ve been up to someone else to catch that traitorous, double-talking jerk trading secrets and sensitive military information with who knew how many unsavory people.

If, if, if. Exasperated with herself, Addison slid into the driver’s seat and moved the car to the gas pump. Might as well top it off while she was here. Hopefully it would save her a stop later.

No matter how she coached herself, she wasn’t sure catching Craig qualified as a blessing in disguise, not when she knew it could cost her everything she held dear. But turning over the information she’d found had been automatic, a reflex she couldn’t suppress any more than breathing. No one should profit from the pain and suffering of others.

Craig had made a fortune for himself and others through legal means. Discovering the fortune he’d amassed through illegal negotiations had shocked her. She couldn’t fathom how he’d made that leap into predatory dealings. She’d only scraped the tip of the iceberg, but she knew without any doubt what would happen if Craig or his nasty colleagues caught up with her and Andy before the authorities took action.

She smiled at her son through the window as she pumped gas. Being the whistle-blower was difficult for anyone, but a single mom? Although she couldn’t abide letting Craig go unpunished, she kept wondering if there’d been a better way to take him down. She’d completely altered two lives when she’d sent the files as an anonymous tip to the local FBI office. All she could do now was hide and pray for the best.

A few more miles down the road Andy piped up again. “Are we going to SeaWorld?”

She’d noticed the billboard, too, and the question wasn’t unreasonable, but she found herself wishing for nightfall. “Not this trip, honey.” Thinking of the crowds and security cameras raised goose bumps along her arms. An attraction like that could prove more risk than entertainment.

“Will Craig have part of our summer adventure with us?”

Only in my nightmares, she thought. “Not this trip,” she repeated, glancing at the elaborate engagement ring that remained on her hand. Taking it off would have Andy asking still more questions she wasn’t ready to answer. Once they reached the bayou she’d throw the damn thing to the nearest alligator. Imagining Craig’s outrage over that move made her smile.

The diamond caught the waning sunlight and she wondered—again—which part of Craig’s income had paid for it. Knowing wouldn’t change how she felt about wearing it, but the aching, wounded part of her heart wanted the answer. She shut that down. There was no sense in being sentimental over a man who’d not only played her for a fool, but also traded lives for money with dangerous people. People who’d want to punish her for blowing up their system. People who were probably searching for her right now. Maybe it would be smart to sell the gaudy thing. She could invest the proceeds for Andy’s college fund. That seemed like a fair enough solution.

“I miss him already,” Andy murmured from the backseat.

“I know.” Craig was the closest thing Andy had had to a father figure because his father had died before he was born. It made her cringe now, in light of his treacherous side business, but it would be another point of grief for her son when he learned that relationship was over. Forever.

Of all the challenges ahead of her, she dreaded navigating that particular tightrope. How could she ever adequately explain her choices to a seven-year-old who’d been so eager for a dad? In Andy’s eyes, Craig had reached near-hero status. Now, thanks to her, in Craig’s eyes she and her son were no more than risks to eliminate. That was more truth than Andy needed weighing on his young shoulders.

“Will the whole adventure be in this old car?”

“No.” She’d hesitated to tell him where they were going, fearful that someone would overhear his chatter during a stop. “Do you think you’d like SeaWorld?”

“Yes! They have whales and dolphins and sharks and turtles and you can swim with them.”

“That does sound like fun.”

“Please can we go, Mom?”

“I can’t make promises, but if it’s possible, yes, we’ll go to SeaWorld.” Eventually.

“Cool! Jeff and Caleb will be jealous. We’ll take lots of pictures, right?”

“Of course.” As long as those pictures wouldn’t jeopardize their secrets.

“I want to pet a shark.”

You’ve already been too close, she thought, checking her rearview mirror. We just didn’t see his teeth. Yet.

“We’ll see.”

“That means no.”

“Not in our house,” she said with more bite than she’d intended. “We’ve talked about that. I need to concentrate right now, okay?”

“Okay.”

“We’ll stop for dinner in two hours.” She smiled, determined to regain her composure. “Can you set an alarm, please?”

“Sure!”

“Thank you.” She checked her mirrors and stared at the long ribbon of highway cluttered with traffic. Once she saw Andy was focused on his handheld game, she turned on the radio, hoping to catch some announcement of Craig’s situation. She wouldn’t feel safe until he was in custody, and she wouldn’t come out of hiding until she was sure his connections had been found. But she heard no updates.

Hours later, when Addison and Andy stopped for dinner, she ducked into a post office for one last precaution. An insurance policy of sorts, in case Craig found a loophole. Letting Andy push the buttons on the automated kiosk machine in the lobby, she breathed a little better when he sent the envelope into the chute.

Whatever happened next, now she could be sure someone else knew the truth about Craig and his involvement in her life.

“Are you mad?” Andy asked, taking her hand as they returned to the car.

“Not with you.” She was definitely mad, but more than the anger, she felt a consuming, unfamiliar terror. All her life she’d known what to do and when to do it. There had been nerves and mistakes, sadness and joy along the way, but overall, she’d had a dream, created a plan and worked tirelessly to make it all a reality for her and her son.

“Then who’re you mad at?”

She considered her answer as he boosted himself back up into the car. “Myself,” she replied honestly. “I made a big mistake.”

“Is that why we’re on this summer adventure?”

Occasionally her son was too perceptive for her comfort. “Partly,” she said with a smile. “But summer is the perfect time for a big adventure.”

“We won’t be in the car the whole time, will we?”

“Already asked and answered, young man,” she said with a laugh. “I promise the real adventure will begin soon.” She thought of the frogs and birds, the still, reflective black water and tall cypress trees where they were headed. He would love it all, so different from any camp or field trip he’d experienced. “You’re going to have all kinds of fun.”

“Promise?”

“Have I ever let you down?”

He actually gave it some thought before he replied, “No.”

“Well, I don’t plan to start now.”

His grin, full of eagerness and love, was too reminiscent of his father. It had her heart aching for what might have been as they got back on the road. Since losing Drew before Andy’s birth, she’d made a practice of focusing on the present. Of course she’d told her son bits and pieces about his real dad as he’d been able to understand them, but with no living relatives in the Bryant family, it seemed best for both of them not to dwell on what couldn’t be changed.