Pamela Hearon - Right Where We Started

The sun had dropped low, so they couldn’t stay long or they’d be walking home in the dark. If she had a dollar for every time she and Mark had walked from his place to hers in the dark, she would be a rich woman. And if anybody had told her six months ago she would ever be making this trek again, she would’ve thought they were delusional.

As they walked down Beecher Road, Tess chatted excitedly, filling in her grandma again on all the details about the mother dog and the puppies.

“Oh.” Her mom jerked to a stop and she stared at the enormous weeping willow. Her mouth twisted into a look of horror. “No!” The word was whispered, but the agony behind it sounded loud and clear. The old tree had been a favorite spot for Audrey, Callie and Mark throughout their childhood. No doubt, the sight of it—not a quick pass like in the car, but a slow approach—had shaken loose a memory. “No, no, no, no.” Her mom thrust her fingers into her hair, gripping the roots, and she squeezed her eyes closed as if she couldn’t bear to see.

Audrey managed to get her arm around her mom’s shoulders. “It’s okay, Mom.” She kept her voice calm as much for Tess, whose wide eyes said she was scared, as her mom. “Here, why don’t we walk this way.” Turning her around was like trying to maneuver a statue.

“No, no, no, no.”

Audrey finally got them headed back in the direction of home, but her mother refused to open her eyes or loosen her grip on her hair. Audrey was terrified she might actually pull some of it out she held it so tightly. Her mind raced, trying to come up with something—anything—that might diminish the anxiety.

A poem came to mind. The one her mom used to recite every evening when they would all walk down to Beecher’s Marina to say good night to Kentucky Lake. “‘I must go down to the seas again,’” she said and felt her mom’s shoulders relax under her arm.

“‘To the lonely sea and the sky.’” To her surprise and delight, Tess’s sweet voice joined hers. She’d recited it often to her daughter when they were on the beach in Florida, but she never realized Tess had committed it to memory.

Her mom’s eyes opened and her hands dropped from her hair to hang at her sides.

“‘And all I ask is a tall ship—’” the duet became a trio “‘—and a star to steer her by.’” A smile broke onto her mom’s face, and Audrey shared a smile and a sigh of relief with her daughter.

“I like those words.” Tess nodded in appreciation. “They’re pretty.”

“Those are the opening lines to ‘Sea Fever,’ a famous poem by John Masefield,” her grandmother explained. Then she went into an in-depth account of the poet and some of his other famous works that lasted the rest of the way home.

When they got there, her mom went on into the house, but Audrey held Tess back for a moment. She stooped down to be at eye level with her. “I’m sorry Grandma got upset, punkin, but you handled it really well. I’m proud of you.” She pulled her into a long, tight hug.

“Can we still go see the puppies?” Tess whispered.

“No, we can’t. Not tonight.” She leaned away to make eye contact. “I’m sorry. I’ll text Mr. Dublin and let him know we won’t be there after all.” Tess nodded glumly. “But we’ll stop by tomorrow after school, and we’ll go every night after supper when we can,” she promised and Tess answered with a resigned sigh.

“Can I play ‘Mario’?”

“Thirty minutes. Then it’ll be time to get ready for bed.”

Tess took off at a gallop through the door and up the stairs.

When Audrey got in the door, she found her mom standing by the sofa table in front of the living room window, looking at the pictures of Win. Her expression was sad but calm as she reached out a finger and traced her daughter’s features in one of the photos. “Callie’s dead,” she said softly.

Audrey walked slowly over to stand beside her. “Yes, she is.” The doctor said to tell the truth if the subject arose.

“You couldn’t say Calinda . You called her Win.” The voice was tender and raw.

“That’s right.” Audrey put her arm around her mother’s shoulder and hugged her as tears made silent tracks down her cheeks.

They stood in silence for a few minutes until her mom finally whispered, “I want to take my medicine now.”

* * *

MARK GLANCED AT the text.

Sorry we didn’t make it. Mom had an episode on the way down to your house. I’ll check on the dogs at least twice tomorrow while you’re at school.

Taking care of Helen had to come first. He swallowed away his disappointment and then chuckled as he looked around the apartment he’d spent the last two hours cleaning and getting ready to show off.

With any luck, it would keep for a couple of days.

He went to check on his new companions in the garage. As soon as he opened the door, Cher left her new bed and went to the door wanting out.

He let her out, stepping outside with her while she took care of her business and then came dutifully back.

He stooped down in front of her and scratched behind her ears. “I would’ve taken you in, with or without Audrey’s help. You know that, right?” Cher closed her eyes and sighed contentedly. “And even after we’ve found the puppies new homes, you’ll always have a home right here.” She gave his hand a grateful lick. Then, ears pricking up, she followed the sound of the soft whine back inside, where she nudged the distraught offspring to let him know Mama was near. He quieted down, and she took the moment of silence to sniff her way around the garage, exploring the new surroundings.

Satisfied her stomach could handle some more food, Mark poured a cupful of dry food into the bowl and set it down beside the water. She came to it immediately and wolfed it down but didn’t beg for more. Instead, she went back to the plush bed and curled up with her babies snuggled beside her.

Mark took a picture of the group with his phone and sent it in a text message to Audrey.

Immediately, she answered back with a smiley face.

The first smile he’d gotten from her in a very, very long time.

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