Copyright
Introduction
Dear Reader
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Extract
About the Publisher
CHAPTER ONE
RAIN SHEETED DOWN the grimy window and puddled on the blacktop, and a dozen identical buses lined up in angled parking slots.
Lillie watched as grim-faced passengers boarded, a few pulling wheeled suitcases, others hauling overstuffed backpacks. As they jockeyed for overhead bins, the scent of damp wool and denim filled the space. And, she realized, someone was eating a tuna sandwich. She hoped its owner would finish it soon, because inhaling the fishy odor wouldn’t make the four-hour trip any easier.
“Are you saving this seat for someone?”
Lillie’s gaze traveled from the man’s haggard face to his frayed sweatshirt and holey jeans. Something told her he hadn’t paid top dollar for the distressed look. The passengers waiting in line behind him seemed equally interested in her answer, so Lillie gathered up her jacket and purse.
“Don’t worry,” he said, settling in beside her. “I don’t bite.”
“That’s good to know.”
His right forefinger aimed at the straps of the backpack nestled in her lap. “I don’t steal either, so...”
She relaxed her grip, but only a bit.
“Going all the way to Florida?”
“No.” As the driver buckled himself in, she slid the backpack to the floor. “Only as far as Baltimore.”
“Ah. A surprise Mother’s Day visit, huh?”
Lillie nodded, watching the driver adjust his rearview mirror, fire up the motor and close the door. It had been dumb luck that she’d get home in time to celebrate the day with her mom. She’d missed the annual cookout last year, thanks to Rising Sun’s strict don’t-leave-the-grounds policy. And in all honesty, she hadn’t been fully present the year before that, thanks to—
“My mom moved to Orlando couple years back. That’s where I’m headed.”
Another nod. Perhaps her nonanswers would send a not interested in talking message.
But he said, “Don’t mind admitting, I’m not looking forward to it.”
Lillie knew the feeling.
“Because last time I saw her, I was falling-down drunk.” He winced, then hung his head. “I apologized. Promised I’d quit. But that look on her face...”
The look that said “I don’t believe you.” Lillie cringed, remembering it on her parents’ faces. Her siblings’. Worse yet, on Jase’s handsome face.
Her seatmate sighed in frustration. Or maybe it was regret.
“That’s what finally convinced me to sign into rehab—that look, I mean—and what kept me clean these past two years.”
A recovering addict, going home to make amends, and to prove that he’d kicked the habit, once and for all.
Just like you, Lill. Except that he’d been sober a whole year longer than she had.
Of all the empty seats on this bus, why had he chosen the one beside her?
He held out a hand. “Gabe Sheffield.”
“Lillie Rourke,” she said, taking it.
She’d learned in rehab that to truly come to terms with drug or alcohol dependence, addicts had to admit their own culpability in the addiction. Lillie had managed to take full responsibility with the staff at Rising Sun, but wasn’t at all sure she could pull it off with the people she’d hurt.
For one thing, her parents and siblings would have questions, and so would Jase. She owed them straightforward answers. What better way to practice dealing with the ugly facts than by confessing them with someone she’d never see again?
“I was in rehab, too.”
“Yeah?” He studied her face. “You could have fooled me.”
“Why?”
“You don’t look desperate, or like you have something to prove.”
During her final group therapy session, that was exactly what a fellow patient feared most. Until that moment, she hadn’t given it a thought. Funny, because she felt both right now.
“Sixteen months ago,” she continued, “I signed myself into Rising Sun. It was a really intense time.”
“How long?”
“Seven weeks.”
Gabe’s brow furrowed as he considered her words. “You beat the addiction in less than the normal amount of time?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Rising Sun, huh? Isn’t that the place where movie stars go?”
Lillie knew how fortunate she’d been to have had Pete in her corner; his steady and generous contributions to the facility helped allow her to take advantage of the facility’s groundbreaking treatments.
“Actually, a friend pulled some strings. I did odd jobs there in exchange for room and board and sessions with the staff.”
“Cool.” Then, “Did you get any autographs while you were there?”
She’d met a major-league baseball player, a well-known country singer and half a dozen Broadway stars. But she felt protective of their anonymity.
“All that matters is that I’ve been out for a year now, working pretty much nonstop, and saving to repay...everyone.”
“Yeah, we tend to rack up some big-time debts, don’t we.”
Lillie bristled. She hadn’t minded being treated like every other resident at Rising Sun, so why did it bother her when this guy assumed he and she were alike?
“So is Baltimore home, or just a payback stop?”
“It’s both.”
Lillie had grown up in the big old house that had become her parents’ B and B. They didn’t know it yet, but Lillie had no intention of accepting a salary for helping out in the kitchen, serving meals and cleaning guest rooms. And although they’d try to talk her out of finding another job to fill the hours when they didn’t need her, that was exactly what she intended to do. Sending money to her siblings, the guys in the band and Jase’s mother had been easy. Earning back their trust wouldn’t be.
Jase? Jase would be another matter entirely.
She thought about what Jase had said that last night. If only there had been venom in his words, or if he’d ordered her to leave. Slammed a door. Something. If he had, she might have learned to live with it. Instead, when Jase found out that she’d stolen the band’s money for a handful of pills, he had looked...
After all this time, the only word she could come up with to describe it was wounded.
Lillie closed her eyes and remembered how she’d gone through the well-rehearsed list of apologies he’d heard far too many times before. Promises that nothing like this would ever happen again. Claims that this time, this time, she’d get help. For the longest time, he’d just stared, grim-faced and slump-shouldered, then quietly ground out, “The guys have bills to pay, too, you know. When are you gonna realize your needs aren’t more important than everybody else’s?”
“Say, Lillie,” Gabe said, breaking into her thoughts, “maybe you can help me make a tough decision. You know, since you understand things.”
“I stink in the advice department.”
He shrugged. “My older brother lives in Florida, too. It’s the main reason our mom moved down there. He owns a landscaping company. Offered me a job and a place to stay. You know, until I get on my feet.” Gabe paused. “But I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. I’m godfather to his thirteen-year-old son, see, and not to toot my own horn, but the kid’s crazy about me.”
Читать дальше