Brenda Jackson - Sleeping with the Sheikh

She remembered being lost, too. She was quickly losing her way once more, especially when he took her breast completely into his mouth and laved his tongue back and forth over her needy flesh. But it only lasted for a short time until he commanded, “Look at me, Andrea.”

She opened her eyes slowly to find him staring at her intently as he began to speak again. “Do you remember how it felt to be so close?”

He tilted his pelvis upward, causing her to gasp. “Yes, I remember,” she said with all the adamancy she could muster at such a moment.

“Do you remember what I told you?”

She could hardly breathe, much less think. “Tell me again, just in case I don’t.”

“I told you that I had never been so lacking in control. That I had never had such feelings or that I had never wanted a woman so badly.”

Coherent words escaped her, but Sam’s enticements came through loud and clear and compelling, his movements more insistent, bringing Andi to the brink, though he had yet to use his hands on her. And, oh, did she want him to do that very thing. But he continued his assault on her senses, touching her only with his words and heady movements. “I also recall that as I brought you to a release, you called my name.”

And that’s exactly what Andi did again as a searing climax overtook her. She literally saw stars this time, too, only they weren’t those found in the night sky above them.

Andi collapsed against Sam’s broad chest and shuddered uncontrollably while he held her close to his heart, which pounded a steady rhythm against her cheek. When the world finally came back into focus, she felt a little foolish. She also realized he had his palm over her mouth.

“No doubt Rashid heard that,” he said, followed by a chuckle. “Do you feel inclined to shout again?”

She managed to shake her head no, still mute even after he dropped his hand from her mouth.

“Have I adequately jarred your memories?” he asked.

He’d done much more than that. “Every last one.”

“Good.” As if the interlude was an everyday occurrence, he set her aside and claimed the opposing seat.

Andi could only stare at him with mouth and shirt gaping until the shock subsided. “That’s it?”

He had the nerve to look surprised. “That was not enough?”

She refused to let him off the hook until she had exactly what she’d been seeking since that first day he’d reentered her life. “I want you to finish this, dammit.”

“It is finished, Andrea.”

“You mean to tell me that you’re willing to leave it at that? Even when you didn’t—”

“That should not matter to you.”

She sent a pointed glance at the obvious ridge beneath his shorts, proof positive that he still had issues he needed to settle. “It does matter to me. I want it all, and I’d bet all the hay in the barn that you want more, too.”

“You want more than I can give you.”

“I want sex, Sam. Hard, lusty limo sex. That’s not too much to ask.”

His eyes took on a solemn cast. “I want to leave knowing that I have done nothing to hurt you.”

This time Andi wanted to scream with frustration instead of passion. “If you’re worried about getting me pregnant, I’ve prepared for that.” She yanked her bag from the floor and opened the zippered pocket to show him the condoms she had purchased the day before.

He still seemed totally immovable as he eyed the foil packets. “That is a wise choice, Andrea, but have you considered how you will protect your heart?”

Anger impaled Andi soul deep, baring the wound that had festered like an inflamed blister for seven years. He still viewed her as that same girl who had hung on his every word, his every touch, too naive to know her own mind. That girl was long gone.

She gripped her open blouse with one hand and tossed the condoms back in the bag with the other. “You just don’t get it, Sam. I don’t want anything except a quick roll. That’s it. No promises of tomorrow. No I love you s. Heck, you don’t even have to sleep in the same bed with me.”

The lie sat like a rock in her belly, but she was too proud to admit that she did want more. She wanted everything, not just sex. She wanted to be with him the next day and the next. She wanted him to be a part of Chance’s life. But most of all she wanted his love, something she knew she would never have.

He had sworn never to hurt Andrea again, yet that’s exactly what he had done by acting as though touching her had meant nothing. In reality it had meant everything.

On the return home the silence in the car had been stifling, and as soon as they pulled up in the drive, Andrea had gathered her belongings and exited the car without speaking. Only, she had not returned to the house. But Sam knew precisely where she had gone.

He could not let so much go unsaid between them. He would need to attempt once more to explain why he could promise her nothing. Perhaps he should tell her about his impending marriage to Maila so she would understand his resistance. Though the young woman meant nothing to him, he felt honor bound to his commitment. He doubted Andrea would understand, yet she needed to hear the truth.

As he set out on the path that led through the fields, the air was heavy with mist, almost stifling, and so were his thoughts as he silently rehearsed what he would say to Andrea. But when he came upon her seated on the blanket facing the pond, her elbows resting on bent knees and her beautiful face cast in the light of a half-moon, everything he had thought to say vanished.

Quietly he came up behind her and dropped to his knees, then circled his arms around her. “I knew I would find you here.”

When she shuddered, he wondered if he should let her go. Instead he held her tighter. “Are you cold?” he asked.

“No. I’m just having a strong sense of déjà vu.”

Sam moved around to face her and took her hands into his. He was uncertain where to begin but decided seven years ago would be an appropriate place to start. “I am sorry for leaving you without an explanation after Paul’s funeral. I feared that if you’d asked me to stay, I wouldn’t have been strong enough to deny you, and I knew that I must.”

She turned her face to the stars. “Let’s not go there tonight, Sam. You did what you thought you had to do.”

He drew in a sharp breath. “I do also wish to apologize for my behavior in the car. It was unfair to you.”

Inclining her head, she surveyed him a moment with soulful blue eyes. “You’ve told me all along that you don’t want me, so you have nothing to be sorry for.”

He released a frustrated sigh. “I do want you. I have never stopped wanting you.”

Her expression brightened somewhat, yet she still looked wounded. “You have a strange way of showing it.”

He attempted a smile. “I thought it was quite evident.”

Finally Andrea’s smile returned, a smile that had stayed with him over many days. Would stay with him always. “Okay, so maybe it was a little obvious.” Her features went solemn once again. “But that’s just a physical reaction, Sam. It doesn’t really mean anything.”

Framing her face in his palms, he said, “You have no idea how much you mean to me. How much you have always meant to me. But I cannot promise you anything.”

“I told you I don’t expect any promises.” She pulled his hand away and held it against her breast. “Life is so very short. No one can predict what will happen tomorrow. We both know that. I’m only asking for here and now. I just want to be with you. And when it’s over, then we’ll both move on with our lives knowing that we’ve found some joy in each other one more time.”