Kate Hewitt - Bad Blood

‘And with any luck, my mother might finally figure out who I am.’ Decades of hurt shimmered in those words and Katie felt her heart break in two as she saw his mouth curve into the familiar mocking smile.

‘Nathaniel—’

‘Don’t look at me with those big, sympathetic eyes. Life sucks, angel.’ His eyes shone hard and cynical. ‘You should know that by now. But you’re still hoping, aren’t you? You’re still dreamy enough to be looking out for that happy ending.’

‘I think sometimes you have to work on the happy ending.’ She eyed the bottle of champagne that lay empty on the floor next to him.

Ever since his plane had touched down in LA, he’d been under the most enormous pressure. And then the emotional turmoil of winning the Sapphire …

‘Your speech was—’ she took a deep breath ‘—it was beautiful, Nathaniel. And I know how tough this whole thing must be for you.’ Katie sat down next to him. ‘Do you want to talk?’

‘No. Absolutely not.’ His eyes glittering like jewels, he slid his hand behind her head and pulled her mouth down to his. ‘There are lots of things I want to do tonight, but talking is definitely not one of them.’

Katie tried to ignore the flash of sexual excitement. No , she thought desperately. Physically he was pulling her close, but emotionally he was pushing her away.

‘Nathaniel—’ she dragged her mouth from his ‘—you can’t just run from this.’

‘Do I look as though I’m running?’ With a smooth, practised movement he shifted her under him and gave her a wicked smile. ‘I’m lying. With you.’

‘Yes, you’re lying.’ Desperate, she pushed at his chest, trying to ignore the way his body felt against hers. ‘You’re lying to yourself. You can’t just pretend nothing is happening ….’

‘Nothing is happening—’ he trailed his lips down her neck ‘—but it will in a minute. I’d better lock the door—I think this calls for a closed set….’

‘No—’ The chemistry threatened to suck her down. ‘ No ! This is crazy.’

‘Sex with you is always crazy.’ His mouth was warm and skilled and Katie turned her head away, trying desperately to ignore the pulsing excitement building inside her.

‘You’re doing what you always do in a crisis—you’re acting.’

Slowly, he lifted his head. ‘You think I’m acting?’

‘Not the sex …’ Her voice was husky. ‘I think the sex is real. But it’s the only thing that is. You can’t keep running, Nathaniel—’

He said a word that shocked her and then he sprang to his feet and paced to the far side of the room. ‘Why not?’

‘Because it doesn’t solve anything.’ It would have been so easy to let the heat take her. Take the easy

route , her body sang, tempting her. Put your arms round him and do what you’re aching to do .

Nathaniel was staring at her, his eyes a dark, dangerous blue. ‘I’ve had enough talking.’

‘Have you returned Jacob’s calls?’

‘What business is it of yours?’

Katie flinched. ‘None.’ Anger mingled with the frustration. ‘None at all. I can see that now.’

‘Don’t sulk.’ He strolled towards her, his mouth flickering into that familiar slanting smile that made her dizzy. ‘Tonight we’re going to party.’

Her heart thudded, a slow unfamiliar beat in her chest. The anger glowed and burned. ‘You can party. If how you feel is none of my business, then there’s nothing more to be said.’

Bold dark brows met in a frown. ‘Katie—’

‘No.’ She held up her hand. ‘I don’t want a relationship that’s just about parties and glitter. I want a proper relationship, and if that means dealing with hard stuff, that’s OK. I’m used to dealing with hard stuff. What I can’t deal with is secrets. My dad had a whole secret life going on and I don’t want to live like that. I won’t live like that.’ Outside the room she could hear laughter and cheers, but inside the room there was silence as Katie was forced to accept that he didn’t actually care how she was feeling.

Nathaniel inhaled deeply. ‘Katie Field …’ A strange smile played around his mouth. ‘Are you dumping me?’

‘No. You’re the one dumping me.’ The anger burning red-hot, she stooped and picked up her bag. ‘Face it, Nathaniel, you don’t want a relationship. A relationship is about sharing—sharing the highs and the lows. And not just yours—everything isn’t about you.’ She swallowed. ‘I came in here to tell you my news … I was excited—’

‘You have something to celebrate?’ He reached for another bottle of champagne and Katie felt her frustration boil over.

‘Don’t you think you’ve had enough?’

‘I don’t think so. In fact, I don’t think I’ve had anywhere near enough.’ He lifted the bottle and popped the cork. Foam spilled over his hand and dripped onto the floor.

Katie had never felt less like celebrating in her life. She felt cold. Terribly cold .

‘You need to speak to Jacob,’ she said. ‘He’s trying to make amends. That’s obvious from the fact he keeps contacting you. You need to stop running. Be brave.’

‘Brave?’ His laugh was mocking. ‘I’m Alpha Man and I have the Sapphire to prove it.’

Sadness spread like dark clouds, blotting out the final rays of happiness. ‘That Sapphire just proves you’re a brilliant actor. But I’ve always known that.

You’ve been the actor, Nathaniel. Now you need to be the man.’

‘You want me to prove I’m a man?’

‘No.’ Ignoring his slow, suggestive smile, Katie straightened her shoulders and held his gaze. ‘Everyone thinks you’re exactly like your character in Alpha Man , but you’re not because he wasn’t afraid to face his fears. You run from yours.’ The dangerous glitter in his eyes made her wonder whether she should turn and run herself. Fast. ‘I’m not talking about the physical stuff—you do all that easily because you’re not afraid to take physical risks. I’m talking about the emotional stuff. That makes you feel vulnerable and you won’t allow yourself to be vulnerable. You won’t allow yourself to take emotional risks. Have you ever asked yourself why you take back-to-back roles with no break in between? It’s because you don’t want to leave a single chink in your schedule where you might actually have to be yourself. You don’t even know who you really are because you’ve been hiding and running for so long. You won’t go home because it reminds you of your past.’ She discovered that her hands and knees were shaking. ‘You avoid your family ….’

His face lost its colour. ‘My relationship with my family is none of your business.’

‘You seem to think you’re the only person in the world with a messy, difficult family, but you’re not! Mine isn’t exactly a picnic. We have our fair share of skeletons. I don’t care. But I wanted to help you. I still want that. I love you …’ She said the words without shame or hesitation. ‘And I know that terrifies you but it’s the truth. And when I think about what you lived through as a child it makes me boiling mad, Nathaniel, but what makes me even madder is that you’re not prepared to face it and deal with it.’

A cynical gleam lit his eyes. ‘And I thought you were such a sweet, sunny little thing. Clearly I had you all wrong.’

‘Do you want to know what makes me most angry?’

‘No—’ he was icily polite ‘—but I’m sure you’re about to tell me.’

‘What makes me most angry is that you’re prepared to destroy what we have because you’re too cowardly to take a risk with your feelings. I know they hurt you, Nathaniel. Your father, Jacob—they all abandoned you. But are you really going to let the past dictate the way you live your life in the future? Before you can go forward, you have to go back. You have to talk to Jacob. You have to accept what happened and live with it, not just keep switching your phone off. You have to be who you really are.’