Ann Lethbridge - Regency Society

‘Yes, Lady Folbroke. And he asked after you. He seemed most interested in your status, and rather ashamed of the length of time since he has last seen you and the fact that he has hidden his blindness.’

She sniffed. ‘The pangs of a guilty conscience, more like.’

‘He had just received a visit from your brother, and was concerned about the reason you removed from the Eston town house. Mr Eston thinks a gentleman is involved.’

‘Too rightly. And with your sudden arrival here, he has concluded that the gentleman is you. What nonsense.’

There was a long pause as Hendricks tried to decide how to respond to his change in status from servant to Lothario. ‘Of course, my lady.’

‘And my husband’s response to this rumour?’

Hendricks held out the letter to her again.

‘I see that. And that it is written in your hand. What, in your opinion, was his reaction to rumours of my infidelity?’

‘In my opinion?’ repeated Hendricks, as though he wished to make it clear that he did not speak for her husband. ‘He is jealous, my lady.’

She felt a brief moment of triumph, followed by annoyance. ‘So what is sauce for the gander is not sauce for the goose.’ She tapped the letter with her nail. ‘And has he set an agenda for this meeting?’

‘He means to tell you of his problems.’

‘And I already know of them. What is meant to come after this grand revelation?’

‘I think he means to come to some understanding between you.’

She tossed the paper on to the fire. ‘In which I am more discreet and he does not change at all. If that is the case, then I hardly need to stir myself, for I am having no part of that.’ She smiled at Hendricks, trying not to look as smug as she felt. ‘I am enjoying myself far too much to stop now. And if the thought of my happiness without him causes him discomfort, then all the better.’

‘Do you wish to send him a message to that effect?’

‘No.’ For some reason, Adrian’s sudden need to see her had angered her to the point where she could hardly speak, probably because she had worked hard and long to quash any hope that it would ever happen. ‘There is no message. If he asks, tell him I have refused. Since he has waited years to summon me, he should not be surprised to find me otherwise engaged on the night he is ready to unburden his soul.’

‘Very good.’ Hendricks frowned at her as though he did not mean it.

And he was right. It was not good. Her behaviour was foolish and childish. It should have been welcome news to find that he worried about her, pined after her and had worn the paint from her picture through constant handling of it. Instead, it reminded her of all the time that had been wasted. She resented being the afterthought to her husband’s infidelities, almost as much as she enjoyed receiving the attention from them. She sighed. ‘I am sorry, Hendricks, that I cannot make this easier upon him. His wife is quite out of patience with him. But I will wait upon him here, tonight, as I have done before. Perhaps he will be more free with his thoughts to his lover.’

Adrian arrived at her rooms that evening, so full of anger and indignation that he did not need to speak to show his mood. It was there in the set of his back, the tightness of his gait, and the staccato rapping of his cane against the parquetry floor. After a moment’s hesitation, she went up on tiptoes to kiss him, and he responded with a perfunctory peck upon the cheek.

Then he brushed off her advance as though he could not be bothered with it, tucking his cane under his arm so that he could tug the gloves off his hands, then tossed them into his hat with unusual force.

Emily stepped away. ‘I thought, after this morning, that I would receive a better greeting than this. What is the matter?’

‘It has been a trying day,’ he said with a glare, tapping about the hall to feel the bench beside him and landing the hat on it with a flick of his wrist. ‘When I am home, I prefer peace and quiet, uninterrupted by changes or surprises. But today it was impossible. Someone had taken it upon themselves to give me a pianoforte.’

‘Do you like it?’ she asked, although she could see by his expression what the answer was likely to be.

‘Have I given you any reason to think that I would?’

‘You had said that you were idle most days. And I thought, if you had something to occupy the daytime hours, then at night you would not need to go out.’

He closed his eyes and gave the frustrated sigh of a man pushed beyond the edge of his temper. ‘Did I not promise you last night that I would not carouse?’

‘While we were together, yes. But I am concerned that, once we are parted, you will forget your promise.’

‘Once we are parted?’ He raised an eyebrow. ‘Have you grown tired of my company so soon?’

‘It is not that at all,’ she said.

‘Or perhaps, after only a day or two, you think you have some claim on me, that you would reorder my life to suit you?’

‘A single gift is hardly an attempt to reorder your life,’ she said.

‘And a large gift it is. A large gift placed in a small space. When you know me better, you will find that I do not like the furniture rearranged once I have taught myself the lay of it. And your pianoforte presents more of an obstacle than an opportunity.’

‘That is because you have not tried it, I am sure,’ she said. ‘You do not need your eyes to play it. Once you learn the scales, you will find that you can make music with your eyes open or closed.’

‘So it is a gift of charity to the poor blind man, is it?’

‘Only if you choose to see it so,’ she coaxed. ‘Some people quite enjoy playing an instrument.’

‘I had quite enough of it, as a boy.’

‘You took lessons, then?’ For she did not remember hearing of them.

‘One or two. And then, in one of my father’s rare shows of sense, he fired the music master and freed me from the duty of it. He bought me a fine jumper, instead.’ He smiled as though he were remembering. ‘And a beautiful beast it was. He could take a fence as easy as walking, and went over the stone walls at the bottom of the yard as though we were flying.’

‘But you cannot do such as that any longer,’ she said.

‘Thank you for reminding me,’ he answered. ‘Neither can I shoot, for it would be a torture to the animals I hunted, more than a sport. From my father and grandfather I learned the dangers of pretending to be a gentleman—I no longer bother to try. And without your help, I have lasted longer as a rogue than either of them.’

She put her hand on his arm. ‘You might think I am showing a lack of faith in your abilities, but we both know that it is a matter of luck and not skill that has brought you some of the way. It is not that I have a claim on you, so much as I would not wish the fate you seek on anyone.’

‘And I have no desire to be led about on a pony, as though I am an infant. Nor do I wish to spend the rest of my life in the parlour, playing scales. Next you will be encouraging me to weave baskets or make buttons. Or maybe I can learn needlework, like an old lady. I swear, you are as bad as those meddling souls that incarcerate the sightless and train them like dogs.’

‘Hardly,’ she said. ‘And I have been to the blind school here, if that is what you mean. It is not so bad.’

His eyes narrowed. ‘It is not a school, my dear. Call it by its right name. The Blind Asylum at Southwark.’

‘It is called an asylum only because it is meant as a place of safety.’

‘Is that what you think? For I went there as well, while I could still see the place. And to me, it seemed as though it was meant to keep the sighted safe from the presence of those of us who are less fortunate.’