Annie West - Royals Untamed!

‘That a man like you would want a more interesting wife.’

‘No.’ He shook his head and took hold of her arms, pulling her closer and forcing her to look up at him. ‘I wanted my wife to be mine and mine alone. I know now that you are. Despite the many months we’ve been apart, you have always been mine.’

This was too much. Her heart began to swoop and soar with hope. Was he opening his heart to her, allowing her in?

‘Yes, I have,’ she said, scarcely above a whisper. ‘I always have, Kazim. I love you.’

CHAPTER TEN

KAZIM REELED BACK in shock, abruptly letting her go. Had he heard her right? Amber loved him? He looked at her face, so beautiful in the soft light from the lanterns, and that new and all too familiar tightness gripped his chest. As he continued to stand, silent from the shock of those words, anxiety leapt to her eyes. He wished he could take it away but he couldn’t, not when he was still unable to believe she meant those words. She hadn’t told him one truth yet.

He stepped back a pace, needing distance from her, from her words. What did she have to gain by lying? Had she said the one thing he never wanted to hear to deliberately anger him? Was this her way of extricating herself from the marriage? Pushing him to the edge?

‘That’s not possible.’ He stepped back further, unable to deal with her latest little lie or the emotions it unleashed within him. He had never wanted to hear those words said to him again. They meant nothing. His past had taught him they were words used to inflict pain—they were weapons. They were also words he never intended to say to anyone. Never. Love, if it did exist, was not for him.

‘Why not?’ Her throaty whisper sounded sexy. Too sexy. A rush of lust throbbed inside him, totally contradicting the shock that still surrounded him.

She walked towards him, her soft brown eyes intently watching his face. He wanted to turn and march away from her. But where was there to go? The wind still wailed beyond the tent, even if the rebels had gone. He was trapped.

His gaze lingered on her slender figure and the way the deep red silk wrapped around her body. She’d changed, casting off the jeans and blouse she’d opted to travel in, but he dismissed the idea that it was for him. The red silk shimmered as she took a step towards him and seemed to give her a regal power he’d never noticed before. She stopped, her eyes intently watching his face, waiting for his answer.

What should he say? I don’t want love—from you or anyone. No, that was getting too close to the truth. Just the thought of saying that aloud made him feel vulnerable.

‘Why not?’ He repeated her question, knowing he sounded defensive. ‘Do you really need to ask?’

‘Actually, yes, I do,’ she replied, her voice sharper now, which at least had the effect of dampening his ardour.

‘You have made it clear that you are here under duress and the only reason is so that your friend’s child can have his medical treatment.’ He turned things back to her in an attempt to halt her uncomfortable questions. He stood his ground as she moved to stand in front of him, determination coming off her in waves. Was she hell-bent on making him face the past—all of it, in one day?

‘So you feel nothing for me?’ Boldly, she looked up at him and he had the strange sensation that it wasn’t him turning the tables, that he was losing his foothold. Somehow he was now the mouse being toyed with by the cat. He didn’t like it. Not one bit.

He thought of the tightness that crushed his chest when his mind wandered to her, but that must be panic; it couldn’t be love. Love only brought pain. He knew that after the way it had scarred his heart all through his childhood. It couldn’t be anything else. After all, as a young man, he had vowed never to love and he had no intention of breaking that vow. He’d seen what one-sided love had done to his mother.

‘Love is a fool’s indulgence.’ He put every bit of anger he had into those words, delivering them with a sharp crack, but Amber stood firm before him, her chin lifted and her shoulders pulled back. Regal defiance emanated from every part of her.

She nodded in agreement. ‘You’re right.’ She looked fiercely into his eyes and he had the sensation she was trying to read his mind, to discover his innermost thoughts. ‘A fool’s indulgence.’

‘Damn it, Amber, don’t look at me like that.’ He was unable to deal with the power shift that had happened as soon as she’d said those words aloud, giving them life and meaning. He didn’t want that. Not now, not ever.

‘What are you afraid of, Kazim?’ She took another step closer and he inhaled deeply, taking in her soft scent, which reminded him of the palace gardens—the oasis of tranquillity he had come to enjoy during brief interludes from his frantic daily life.

What was he afraid of? That was a question he’d never wanted to answer—until now. The woman he’d married out of duty, the woman who had professed to hate him, was now the woman who was making him face the past head-on.

He didn’t want to face it. He couldn’t face it.

‘It’s a useless emotion, Amber. Love serves no purpose. You and I have married out of duty, and it can’t be anything more than that.’ Control returned and he looked down into her upturned face, keeping his own devoid of emotion. She must never know the turmoil she’d unleashed with those three words. If she did, it would give her every last bit of power, leaving him completely exposed, and that was not acceptable. He never wanted to experience that harsh vulnerability or to have his inner peace hanging by a thread, one that could be cruelly cut at any time.

‘Ah, yes, a duty you took so seriously you couldn’t even make me your wife on our wedding night. Was it really the scandalous rumours that disgusted you, or was it the fact that you couldn’t do your duty because I wasn’t your usual choice of woman and you didn’t desire me?’

Her words were granite-hard, laced with a hint of sarcasm like a lethal cocktail. It was as if suddenly she had turned to steel or been sculpted from ice. He didn’t really care. At least she wasn’t throwing herself at him, professing love as false as the tears that had threatened to wet her cheeks. He couldn’t take that sort of emotional display. It was too raw.

‘It was nothing more than the fact that I had been led to believe you were an innocent bride. Exactly what a prince would want.’ He spoke firmly, now more in control of the strange sensations that had assailed him when she’d made that ridiculous confession. ‘I certainly hadn’t been expecting a dancer, especially one so provocative and alluring. It was like I’d stepped back in time and I was a sheikh selecting from his harem. That is something I never wanted to experience.’

It was that image, coupled with the rumours, that had made him turn from her—the image of a bullying sheikh, demanding and unrelenting. A sheikh like his father had been. It was too close to his past.

Her eyes lowered and those lovely long lashes spread over her cheeks and he balled his hands into fists in an effort to stop himself reaching out and touching her, lifting her chin so that he could see her face. If he let his mind continue to wander that path of want and need, he would end up taking her in his arms, kissing her until she begged him to make her his again.

‘I’m sorry—about that night, I mean.’ She looked shyly up at him and his heart suddenly thumped like a drum. ‘In my inexperience, I was doing what I thought right.’

He clenched his fist harder. She was testing him fully. First the soft words, then the fiery determination, then the coyness. What would be next? The tears?

‘It’s not important any more.’ He moved away from her, away from the intoxicating scent of her perfume and the alluring darkness of her eyes, away from the temptation of her soft lips.