Kitty Neale - A Family’s Heartbreak

‘I know but look at the state of me, I’m a complete mess.’

‘You look fine.’

‘Where are my shoes?’ she asked frantically, her eyes darting around.

‘In your bedroom I should think.’

Jenny couldn’t run upstairs, but walked as quickly as she could, to find her father emerging from his room.

‘What’s all the fucking commotion about?’ he growled.

‘Sorry, Dad. The boys are a bit excited because I’m taking them to the common, that’s all.’

‘Good. Get a move on and get them out from under my feet then. Where’s your sister? I want some breakfast.’

‘Gloria’s downstairs, Pamela has gone to stay with Gran ’cos she had a fall.’

‘Huh, your mother should be looking after the old girl. Is your gran all right?’

‘Yes, just a bit shaky, I think.’

‘Right. I ain’t got time for your mother, but Edith’s a good woman. ’Ere, take this and get her some flowers or something … make sure you say it’s from you kids though. I don’t want her thinking I’ve gone soft in the head.’

Jenny tried not to show her astonishment as her dad fished in his trouser pocket and handed her five bob. She muttered, ‘Er, right, thanks.’

He barged past her and she stood bewildered as he stomped downstairs. This was turning into a day of surprises. Once in her room, Jenny shoved the money into her purse, put her shoes on, ran a brush through her tangled hair and grabbed a light coat. Although she was still sore, the thought of meeting Craig muffled her pain. She took a last quick glance in the mirror and decided there wasn’t any need to pinch her cheeks: they were red enough already. Too red, in fact, but there was nothing she could do about her persistent blushing.

She drew a long, deep breath, which was a mistake and she gasped at the pain in her ribs. Shallow breathing was all right, and they’d have to walk slowly, but she was thrilled that Craig was joining them. Slowly she walked downstairs, to see Timmy and Peter hovering at the street door. ‘Come on then, boys, let’s go,’ she said, and called, ‘See ya later.’

Craig was casually standing close by, and as she walked up to him, once again her stomach somersaulted. She tried to act cool, though felt sure her glowing neck and cheeks gave her away. ‘Hello again.’

‘That was quick,’ Craig said cheerfully.

‘We was ready before Jenny,’ Timmy piped up.

‘And we’ve got a picnic,’ Peter added, then they ran on ahead.

Craig took the shopping bag from her and frowned. ‘You look a bit uncomfortable. Is this walk going to be too much for you?’

‘As long as we take it slowly I’ll be fine.’

The boys were in a rush, and Jenny had to call them back a few times as they ran on ahead, but eventually they reached the common and stood by the pond.

‘Can we have some bread for the ducks now?’ Peter asked.

‘Yes, here you go,’ Jenny answered. She took the bag from Craig, fished out the stale bread and broke it in two. The boys merrily skipped off and Jenny smiled. It was nice to see them so happy and carefree, especially after how upset Peter had been earlier.

Craig removed his jacket and laid it out on the grass bank. He offered Jenny his hand and helped her to sit down. ‘Penny for them,’ he said.

‘I was just thinking how lovely it is to see the boys relaxed and having fun.’

‘I know it’s none of my business, but I can’t imagine it’s easy for any of you with your dad being the way he is.’

He sounded so sincere and sympathetic that Jenny found herself opening up to him. ‘No, it’s not easy. The boys are too young to understand why my dad behaves the way he does. When he loses his temper, it frightens them, and while my sister Pam lives on her nerves, my other sister Gloria is filled with hate. I just wish there was more I could do to protect them.’

‘Well, maybe there is.’

‘I don’t see how,’ Jenny answered. She’d thought long and hard but hadn’t come up with a solution. She couldn’t afford to rent somewhere for them all and even if she tried to squeeze them all in to her gran’s flat, she knew that would be the first place her dad would look.

‘That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I think you should all move in with me.’

Jenny gasped. Craig’s suggestion had taken her by surprise and the idea seemed ludicrous. ‘But … but we can’t —’

‘Wait, hear me out. I realise space would be tight, but me and the boys could sleep in the lounge and you girls could have the bedroom. It would only have to be temporary. With my earnings, plus yours and Gloria’s wages, we could look for somewhere bigger.’

She gawped at Craig and spluttered, ‘No … no … we … we can’t move in with you. What would people say? I … I’d be labelled a slut.’

‘We can put them straight, tell them we aren’t a couple, and anyway, who cares what people think? This is about getting you all out of harm’s way. I can’t stand the thought of your dad hurting you again and though I know it isn’t ideal, you’d be safe. What do you think?’

Jenny didn’t know what to think. ‘It’s mad, bonkers and … and why would you do that for us?’

Craig rolled his eyes, then took Jenny’s hand. ‘Isn’t it obvious? I know we’ve only just met, but I like you, Jenny. I want to protect you, the boys and your sisters.’

Jenny gazed into Craig’s eyes and felt his offer was genuine. There was no ulterior motive, just an honest offer of help. She was worried about her dad’s increasing violence, and longed to take her siblings to safety, so Craig’s suggestion made sense. It could work, but her reputation would be in shreds. Could she stand the pointing fingers and the gossip? ‘I … I don’t know, Craig. Thank you so much for your offer, but I … I need to think about it.’

‘What’s there to think about? I don’t want to sound like I’m rushing you, but if your father kicks off again and hurts you, I’d never forgive myself for not putting pressure on you to agree.’

‘I know, but, it just doesn’t seem right. Are you sure you’ve thought this through? You’d be giving up a lot by having my family living with you.’

‘Jenny, I’ve been thinking about it all night. Like I said, it wouldn’t be for long and then we’d find somewhere bigger, more suitable, but for now, I’d know that your father couldn’t get to you and I’d sacrifice anything for that sort of peace of mind.’

Jenny was touched by Craig’s concern and had to hold back from crying. The idea was appealing, but she couldn’t shake the worry about what people would think.

Craig squeezed her hand. ‘I didn’t have any breakfast, so what have you put in those sandwiches? Let’s eat, it’ll give you a moment to think.’

Jenny pulled one out, ‘I’m afraid it’s only fish paste.’

‘That’ll do me,’ he said, biting into it with relish.

With her mind all over the place, Jenny watched the boys playing. She thought about Peter’s behaviour earlier, how he didn’t want to live with their father, and of Pamela who was so afraid of him that she constantly wet the bed. What would their father’s reaction be if they all left? He wouldn’t know they were just upstairs from Edith. Yet why was she thinking about that? It was impossible, they couldn’t all move in with Craig! Could they?