Julia London - Seduced By A Scot

“I beg your pardon!” she said angrily. “Is this part of Mr. Garbett’s scheme, too? Did he think I deserved to be carried off like so much luggage?”

An actual response to her question did not seem necessary, particularly when she immediately asked another question.

“Where are we going? It will be dark soon. You canna mean to carry on in the dark.”

His hope was that they would reach Crieff before it was too dark, but before he could answer, she said, “It is apparent that I’ve traded one wretched situation for another, is it no’?” Nichol sensed she had asked her question of the heavens, and not of him. He was right.

“I will be forced to ride like a hostage across all of Scotland and for what? Another man who might abuse my sensibilities?”

“You have my word I will leave your sensibilities verra much untouched,” he said.

She clucked her tongue. “You will pardon me for no’ believing you, Mr. Bain. In my experience, a man’s word is hardly reliable. Mr. Garbett once vowed I would always have a home with him, and yet, here I am, cast out. In the dark,” she added, looking about with a wee bit of nervousness.

Nichol didn’t say anything to that, but it was true that he might know more about being cast out of a home than he was willing to share.

“I know what you think,” she continued. “But on my honor, I didna kiss that man. You canna know how impossible it is to breathe when no one believes you. What motive would I have to lie? Och, but I hardly expect you to understand,” she said with a shake of her head.

Nichol opened his mouth to argue that perhaps he could, but Miss Darby barreled on. “I canna be blamed that, on the rare occasion I was included in a gathering or a call with Sorcha, that gentlemen often looked to me. I never invited it and did my best to avoid it, on my word! But gentlemen believe themselves to be irresistible to the fairer sex and canna possibly believe that a lass would no’ desire his attention, and seek to right that wrong. Even when a lass’s lack of desire is clearly stated, aye? Mr. Cadell was the worst offender! I was quite clear that I didna want his attentions, that he was no’ to touch me, that I would scream if he did, and do you know what he said? He said, ‘You donna mean that,’ and put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me against the wall and bloody well kissed me.”

She paused, cast a quick glance at Nichol over her shoulder. “I beg your pardon for my choice of words,” she added demurely. “I feel passionately that I’ve been wronged, I do.”

“I would—”

“ Och, donna give me platitudes, I beg of you. I’ve heard enough of them in the last fortnight, I have. And besides, I can guess easily enough what you think, Mr. Bain—that a man’s desire canna be denied or some such foolishness.”

“That is no’—”

“But what of a woman’s desire, I ask you? Am I to have no say in it? Must I be subjected to him because he canna help himself? I tried to warn Mrs. Garbett and Sorcha about him, on my life I did. I meant it to warn her, to relate something of vital importance that she verra well ought to know, aye? But instead of thanking me for my honesty, Mrs. Garbett accused me of inviting his attentions. You’d no’ believe what they said!”

“You donna—”

“They claimed that I’ve long had a habit of walking and speaking and smiling that serves only to invite male attention, and for that reason, I was often left at home, for I couldna be trusted. I swear to you, Mr. Bain, I swear on my father’s grave, that I walk and I speak and I smile in the only manner I know how, and it is no’ to invite attention, it is to get from one place to the next.”

He silently arched a brow, uncertain if he was allowed yet to speak.

Apparently it was not yet his turn, for Miss Darby sighed, then drew a deep breath to launch once more.

Nichol guessed that she had not had the opportunity to say these things to anyone, and all her feelings about what had happened in Stirling were pouring forth.

“If that were all of it, I would find my peace with it, on my word, I would. But that was no’ all of it, oh no. The Cadells were guests for more than a fortnight, and Mr. Cadell could no’ be avoided. He sought me out at every opportunity, even though he was affianced to Sorcha. Mrs. Garbett said I purposely seduced him. No’ only did she accuse me, they cast me out, and then took the only thing of my family that belonged to me. I would have gladly returned the gowns that were passed down to me and kept with the two muslins Mr. Garbett commissioned for me, but they took my necklace . My necklace, my heritage. Left to me! Can you believe the gall of it? After all these years, after trying so desperately to stay in the shadows for the sake of Sorcha, and they took my necklace!”

Nichol hadn’t heard of any jewelry. “What necklace?”

“My necklace, my necklace!” she said impatiently, as if she’d explained this to him before. “It was a king’s gift to my great-grandmother, handed down to my mother and then to me. It’s quite valuable, but believe me when I say it’s worth canna compare to the sentimental value it holds for me, aye? It is the only thing I’ve left of my family, the only thing that ties me to my name.”

Something shuddered through Nichol. He understood better than this young woman could possibly imagine what it was to want to belong to a name. He understood how deeply unsettling it was to feel the snap of that thin thread. “This is the first I have heard of a necklace, Miss Darby. Had I known, I would have bargained to have it returned to you.”

“ Och, but you would have lost that bargain,” she said sullenly. “The depravity there is surely beyond your ability to comprehend, Mr. Bain.”

“On the contrary, I comprehend quite well,” he said, and left it at that. It would be impossible to explain to her how or why he comprehended it as well as he did.

She twisted about so that she could view him fully and with unconcealed skepticism. “Donna tease me, Mr. Bain. You are no’ acquainted with me, and it will no’ be apparent to you that at present, I am in a very foul humor and likely will take offense. I canna even promise that I’ll no’ hit something quite hard.”

She seemed very serious indeed, and Nichol made an effort to keep any sort of smile from his face. “I’ve had an inkling to your state of mind,” he said, thinking that might be obvious, seeing as how she would not answer the door, then tried to keep him out by locking a window. “You’ve made it abundantly clear to all, then. I’d no’ tease you, Miss Darby. Mr. Cadell is a coward and a scoundrel. Desire that is not mutually shared between a gentleman and a lady is pointless and vulgar.”

She blinked, her gaze on his mouth, as if she didn’t believe he’d actually spoken those words.

“Unfortunately, what I believe doesna change your situation. I have endeavored to find a solution that suits you. No’ Mr. Garbett. You. ”

She snorted and shook her head, and turned her glittering blue eyes away from him, and Nichol felt a tiny little flicker of regret that she had. “There is nothing that will suit me, Mr. Bain. My patience and accommodating nature are at an end!”

He didn’t think it his place to persuade her otherwise, and even if he’d been so inclined, he would not have the opportunity. Now that Miss Darby had been freed from the wretched conditions in Aberuthen and the Garbett house and, apparently, her silence, she had a long list of complaints.

“They forced me to leave all behind,” she said again. “It was vindictive. It hardly mattered that all these years I endeavored to be pleasing, to stay well in the shadows, to keep to my room. But Sorcha and her mother were determined to lay blame and hardship at my feet, they were. What would be the harm, I ask you, in bringing along my needlework?” she demanded, her voice full of anger once again. “It was only half finished, useless to all of them, aye? Och, I donna care, Mr. Bain, I donna. I will start anew.”