Caroline Anderson - Nothing Left to Give

As she watched Gideon in action with his children, the ache round her heart intensified. If only, she thought, but she had given up hoping long ago. Happiness would never come her way. She had always been on the outside looking in, from her childhood onwards. She had never belonged, never been wanted for herself.

Once she had thought she was truly loved, but it had been a foolish dream, and she should know better now than to indulge those dreams.

Dreams, after all, like hope, were easily shattered.

She washed up her cup and made her way to bed, snuggling under the quilt and blocking out all thoughts of Gideon. She thought instead of her job, of the people she had met and the lovely town which had made her so welcome.

Gradually she relaxed into sleep, but the dreams came then, dreams of her and Gideon and a huge old bed, of murmured sighs and soft caresses, of lightning heat and tender cries of love…

Gideon lay staring at the ceiling. Nothing he did would banish her. Even his shirt when he had taken it from her earlier held the lingering trace of her scent where she had held it against those small, soft breasts.

His body tautened, desire stabbing him, and he rolled on to his front, burying his face in a pillow.

Damn her. No, damn himself. She had done nothing. She was sweet and innocent, her face transparent.

The hunger he had seen on it was echoed now in his body, stalking his loins, making him ache for the release only Beth could give him.

Except she couldn’t, because he wouldn’t let her. He couldn’t. Damn it, she was nearer to Will’s age than his. What would she want with him?

And besides, the whole idea was fruitless. Beth was a forever person, a happy-ever-after and roses-round-the-door sort of girl. There was neither time nor emotion left in his life for the sort of loving she deserved.

Try telling his body that.

With a ragged groan he thumped the pillow and turned on to his side and made an effort to relax.

Slowly sleep came, but with it dreams—dreams of Beth, her slender limbs entwined around him, her mouth soft and warm against his skin, her eyes luminous with love.

He woke abruptly, his heart pounding, his body screaming for release. Unable to sleep, unable to tolerate the frustration and unwilling to examine the wash of loneliness that had hit him as he realised he was alone, he threw off the bedclothes, dragged on his clothes and went down to the study.

If he was going to be awake, he might as well be doing something useful.

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