Isabel Sharpe - All I Want...

“No.” Lucy lifted her chin and met Krista’s eye defiantly. “But what we have is forever.”

“That’s a line from some sappy movie on the Lifetime Channel.” She forced herself to lower and gentle her voice. “This is reality we’re dealing with here. Or trying to.”

“You don’t understand. You’ve never been in love.”

“I—” She snapped her mouth shut. Kaboom. There it was. The horrible, tremendous truth. Lust, oh yes, infatuation, sure, sometimes pretty strong. But love? Nope. Emphatically not. When her relationships ended, she was over it in a week, sometimes two. And she wasn’t quite sure why.

She took a deep breath. “Okay, you’re right. I haven’t been. Not for real.”

“Because you always fall for creeps.”

Another deep breath. “But, I—”

“Bad boys who excite you for about twenty minutes until they ejaculate and run.”

“Lucy…”

“Am I wrong?”

Krista wrinkled her nose. “Exaggerating maybe. But how about we get back to you?”

“I’d rather stay on this subject.”

“Of my miserable failings? No way. We’re talking about you and how it’s not happening with you guys anymore.”

“Relationships are work.” Lucy stared at Krista pointedly. “If you’d had one that lasted more than the first thrilling months, you’d know.”

Ouch. Okay, fair enough. But none of that took away from the fact that Lucy was unhappy and Krista hated seeing her that way. Working on relationships was one thing. Staying when there was nothing left to stay for was another.

She reached across the table to touch her sister’s hand. “Answer this. Deep down, don’t you really think it’s over?”

Lucy’s shoulders hunched. She dropped her eyes. “Link is a good person. I love him.”

“Avoiding the ques-tion.” Krista sang the words, but gently.

“We’re…definitely in a bad place.”

“Yes or no, Luce?”

“Kris….” She took a deep breath and blew it out. “Okay. I don’t know how we can get past what’s happening.”

“Now we’re getting some—”

“But I know we can if I can just figure it out.”

Krista resisted rolling her eyes. But okay, she’d pushed plenty hard enough. Her runaway mouth had done its thing again. Like an alcoholic or a depressed person, Lucy had to get to that place of wanting to change by herself. All Krista could do was nudge occasionally—hard enough to get Lucy thinking but not so hard Lucy panicked and cleaved unto Link like mortar unto brick. “Okay. I’m done meddling. I’m sorry. I just want you to be happy.”

“I know. I will be when we work this out.” Lucy lowered her tensed shoulders and shook her head, forcing a cheerful expression. “You, on the other hand, are hopeless.”

“Me?” Krista blinked innocently.

“Because you can’t look past a hot body.”

“Mmm, no.”

“Or a cocky attitude.”

“Ooh, you got that so right.”

“Or the huge initial adrenaline rush of lust.”

“Hit me, baby, one more time.”

Lucy laughed and Krista grinned in response, wishing the subject of Link could put that smile on her face.

“See? Hopeless!”

“But at least I’m still out there trying for what I really want. If it doesn’t show up soon, I’m happy playing for a few more years.”

“Happy? Was that not you grumbling and moaning into your noodles two months ago when Robby stopped calling?”

“Oh. Yes.” Krista heaved a wistful sigh. “Robby the Wonder Dick.”

“Mmph.” Lucy slammed down her water glass and covered her mouth to swallow carefully. “Krista.”

“Yes?”

“Someone might hear you.”

“Who’s going to hear me? And even if they did I’m sure they’d be happy for me. Getting skillfully laid is a very good thing.”

“Shhh.” Lucy glanced around, beet-red.

Krista took pity on her. “No one is listening. And you know I go into every relationship hoping I’ll get it right this time. You’re just too fun to tease.”

“Like when you told me I was adopted because my skin smelled wrong?”

“Ha! What about when you told Mom I was planning to throw red socks into a white load of wash and I wasn’t?”

“Who added Shep’s kibble to my party snack mix for Home Ec?”

“Who squirted disappearing ink on my white prom dress the second my date rang the doorbell?”

“Truce!” Lucy held up her little finger, crooked. Krista did the same. They locked pinkies and grinned.

“I just want everything to work out for you.” Krista disengaged her pinkie and squeezed Lucy’s hand.

“I know.” Lucy looked dejectedly down at her barely touched curry. “I’ll think of something.”

“Well, in the meantime, eat. You’re losing weight—and you have none to lose.” Krista picked up her fork and shoveled in some more pad thai. She, on the other hand, could still eat heartily while being carried off by a tornado.

Lucy glanced up at Krista, then back down at her plate. She pushed her food around again with intense concentration it didn’t deserve. “Um…Krista?”

Krista put down her fork. Uh-oh. This was going to be something big. “Yeah, hon?”

“I need to tell you something.”

“I’m listening.”

“There’s this guy at my office….” A blush bloomed on Lucy’s cheek.

Krista’s eyes shot wide. “Omigod! Tell me. What’s happening? He’s into you? You’re into him?”

Lucy kept her eyes down, but her cheeks were rapidly leaving pink behind in favor of red. “I guess…yeah. I’m so confused. It’s…I’m so confused.”

“Well, so what’s happening?” Krista tried to sound calm, but she wanted to give herself a huge high-five. Yes! A possible escape route from being trapped in Lincoln hell! “Has he asked you out?”

“Yes. I can’t go, of course. But he…I mean, he sort of makes me—”

“Ooooh. He does?”

Lucy jerked her head up, frowning. “You don’t even know what I’m going to say.”

“Hot. Crazy. Ready to tear your clothes off at the merest glance from his endless, fathomless, fire-starting eyes.”

“Yeah.” Lucy whispered the word and a big fat tear slipped out of her eye. “That.”

Krista’s heart melted. “Oh, honey, don’t cry. This is not bad. This is…wonderful. I mean—wait. Sheesh, what am I saying? Complicated is what it is.”

“I know. I know.” Lucy pressed her napkin to the corner of her eye. “This morning he asked me if I wanted to have a drink with him after work.”

“And?”

“I said no. Of course I said no.”

“But…you wanted to say yes?”

A tearful nod.

“Oh, boy.” Krista took a deep breath, torn between sympathy and excitement that this might be the shove Lucy needed to move on to greener pastures. From there maybe onto the stage or screen where she belonged, where she’d make “stars” like Aimee into more of a parody than they made themselves.

“You know, Lucy, this might be a sign. I know I’m not in a position to give expert advice on anyone’s love life. But if a man affects you that strongly…and considering that your relationship with Link has stalled out…Well, when someone makes you that crazy, I think you need to go with it.”

“But I barely know him.”

“You gotta start somewhere.” She searched her brain for more arguments. Something had to click with Lucy. “You must be curious about him, aren’t you?”

Another nod.

“I’m not suggesting cheating, just a drink—to see how it feels.”

“But, Kris, this attraction is based on nothing. Link is real, I know him inside out. Josh is hormones and fantasy.”

“So what’s wrong with fantasy? When else are you going to get the chance to indulge one? You’re always so damn sensible.” Krista leaned forward. “You want to know my deepest, darkest, craziest fantasy?”