Brenda Novak - Discovering You

“Of course.”

A momentary flash of hope shot through India, which Claudia immediately extinguished.

“But later,” she said. “She’s right in the middle of helping Papa make lunch. We’ll have her call you after, if we get the chance.”

If we get the chance... They wouldn’t call, and if India ever asked why, they’d invent some excuse. Charlie’s parents were so possessive of their granddaughter.

Now that India knew she wasn’t going to be speaking to her little girl, at least in this conversation, she moved on to the purpose of her call. “I got hold of Detective Flores earlier.”

“You did? I’ve called and called. I always get his darn voice mail. What’d he say? When’s the next trial?”

Rod came into view, the muscles of his left arm bulging as he carried the grass clippings to the green waste can. India put her hand to the window as if she could touch his warm skin or feel the solid thud of his heartbeat—as if such a strong man could shelter her in some way. But that was ridiculous. He was rough around the edges, much more like the ex-boyfriends who’d created so many problems for her in the past than true-blue Charlie.

“They’re waiting,” she told Claudia.

“I couldn’t hear you. What’d you say?”

India forced herself to speak louder. “They aren’t convinced they have enough evidence to get a conviction. They’d rather not risk a second trial, not until they’ve built a stronger case.”

Another long silence, this one filled with shock and anger.

India could identify with both of those emotions.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Claudia said when she spoke again.

“I’m afraid not.” India swallowed, trying to wet her tongue, to make it easier to speak. “But Detective Flores is hopeful that they’ll be able to bring him back to trial soon.”

“When?”

India watched Rod disappear around the corner of his house again. “They can’t give us a date. Yet.”

“Which means what? It may never happen? Is that animal going to get away with what he did to my son? He took a life! And not just any life—the life of someone who mattered!”

India winced. She’d often felt Claudia wished she’d been the one to die that night. There’d been times she’d wished the same thing...

“It’s heart-wrenching,” she said and prayed she’d put enough emotion into that statement. The Sommerses, and everyone else who knew Charlie, were always watching her and interpreting everything she said or did with such suspicion. She felt as bad as Claudia did about this most recent turn of events. But she couldn’t commiserate with her on the DA’s lack of action or show the doubt she had that Sebastian would eventually be brought to justice, because then her mother-in-law would start thinking about Cassia and the fact that she might not be safe living with her mother.

If India wanted her daughter back without a fight, she had to ignore her own despair and convince the Sommerses that this was only a temporary setback.

“It’s beyond heart-wrenching,” Claudia said. “There are no words for what we’ve suffered.”

That was true. The past eleven months had been hellish. And yet, for her own sake as well as Cassia’s, India had to keep herself together. She was fighting to do that. Charlie wouldn’t want them to be miserable, but this new hurdle...

India wasn’t sure how she’d get past it.

“They’ll find the gun,” she said. “That’s what they need. If they find the gun and they can link it to Sebastian, they’ll have him.”

“You knew Sebastian well,” Claudia said. “What could he have done with it? Where might he have put it?”

That night was a jumble of terror for India, but she could trace the gun through those memories because Sebastian had it in his hand, pointed at her, for so long. She’d spent hours believing he’d shoot her, and Cassia would be an orphan. “I told you. I told everyone. He took it with him when he ran out.”

“If they haven’t found it by now, they never will,” her mother-in-law said. “What more can they do that they haven’t already done? What more can we do? We hired that PI—little good it did us. He accomplished nothing, and the police haven’t been much better. Detective Flores will move on to other cases, and we’ll be left with our lives destroyed and Charlie’s killer running around free.”

“Please. Don’t talk like that,” India said. “We have to retain hope.”

“I have to go,” Claudia said abruptly.

India was afraid to let her hang up for fear of what she might decide. “I’m sorry about this, Claudia. I wish... I wish Detective Flores had given me better news, but...don’t assume the worst. We’ll see justice yet.”

“Is that what you think? Because there is no real justice. You get that, right? Even if Sebastian goes back to prison for life, we’ll still have to live without Charlie.”

“Which is hard to fathom. I know.”

“You do? Because sometimes I can’t help feeling...”

India’s stomach cramped at the sudden bite in Claudia’s tone. “Yes?” she prompted when her mother-in-law’s words fell off.

“As if you’re—”

Someone—her father-in-law?—spoke in the background, but India couldn’t make out the words.

“Never mind,” Claudia said instead of finishing.

That sudden reversal led India to believe Steve had anticipated what was about to come out of his wife’s mouth and admonished her against it.

“What?” India pressed, but she could guess. The Sommerses had questions about her involvement with Sebastian. They didn’t understand why she’d been associating with him again. If she hadn’t accepted him back into her life, none of this would’ve happened.

India wished she could explain. She’d tried, several times. But in light of what Sebastian had done, her reasons sounded lame. Everyone thought she, of all people, should’ve had some idea what he was capable of. Yes, she’d known he could be angry and unreasonable, even unpredictable. He’d gotten her in serious trouble when he robbed that liquor store on a whim. But he’d been young and impulsive, and he’d done what he could to make sure the police understood she’d played no part in it. That was why they hadn’t charged her. He’d apologized over and over for involving her that day.

Prison and the drugs he’d taken over the years had changed him more than she could ever have dreamed. She’d assumed he’d learned his lesson—and was just down on his luck. She’d also naively thought she could help him.

How she wished she’d never responded to that first message on Facebook. She’d been beating herself up over that ever since. At first she hadn’t understood why she’d allowed Sebastian to reconnect with her, either. But, unlike the Sommerses, she had no family. That made her hesitant to cast old friends aside, even if they’d once been boyfriends.

“We love Cassia,” Claudia said. “She’s all we have left of Charlie. Thank you for letting her stay with us.”

In other words, Charlie’s mother was biting her tongue in order to preserve the relationship. But the calm her in-laws affected almost worried India more than if they’d unleashed their anger and disappointment. So much turbulence churned under the surface of those “still waters,” probably more than she’d ever be able to overcome.

She feared where those powerful currents were carrying them...

“Of course. Cassia loves you. So do I,” she added, hoping to retake some of the ground they’d lost.

Her mother-in-law wasn’t receptive. “Good night” was all she said.

As Claudia disconnected, India let her head fall against the cool glass. It wasn’t until she heard the sound of a mower in her own yard that she remembered Rod.