Deb Kastner - The Cowboy's Baby Blessing

It couldn’t get much more real than watching his best friend, Luke, being gunned down right in front of him, hit by a sniper who barely missed Seth, but that wasn’t something he wanted to share with a woman he’d barely met.

He didn’t even like to think about it, much less talk about it.

“I’m so sorry. I know you were in the army. I didn’t mean to remind you of hard times.”

He shrugged. “Life is what it is. I’ve learned that I have to accept it and move forward. The key is to watch my attitude. I’ve chosen to remain positive.”

“That’s a wonderful outlook, and one I try to follow myself, although I’m not always successful at it. Sometimes it’s easier to see the glass as half-empty.”

Her gaze dropped and she blew out a breath. He waited for her to finish her thought, but she remained quiet. He knew what she wanted to say but couldn’t.

Easier, but not better.

“I’m majoring in athletic training,” he said to fill the silence.

“Based on your demonstration before, I’d say that ought to be right up your alley.” She snapped back to the present and smiled at him, although he could see it was forced. “What do you plan to do when you graduate? Coach high school sports?”

He shrugged. He wasn’t much of a planner and never had been. He only vaguely pictured his future beyond the challenge of four years of hitting the books. He knew from experience that too much could change between now and then. What was the point of making all these grandiose plans only to discover life is nothing like you expect it to be?

“I don’t know yet. I think it’d be cool to work with a pro sports team. Football or baseball, maybe, or even basketball. That’d give me the opportunity to travel the country, which I’d like to do. Or if not that, then maybe I could work with a college sports program. I’d like to think I could make a difference with the kids coming through the ranks.”

“I suspect you’d be very good at that, given the skillzzz I saw you display today.”

He laughed at her exact replication of Jo’s word, all the way down to the crackly tone of voice that the old redhead had used.

“I’m probably just kidding myself thinking I can get into the big leagues, but I figure I might as well reach for the sky, right?”

“Or swing for it.” She laughed. “What’s that called, anyway? That thing you were doing earlier with the swinging and jumping and backflips?”

His smile widened. “Parkour. It’s basically focusing your mind with the intent of seeing and interacting with your environment in a different way. It puts everything into perspective. You should try it sometime. I could give you a lesson or two.”

Her eyes widened in surprise and then she burst out laughing.

“With this body?” She gestured at herself from head to toe. “I don’t think so.”

He didn’t see anything wrong with her body. She was full figured, but in a healthy way. Besides, parkour was a mental exercise as much as a physical one.

“You shouldn’t limit yourself, Rachel. Parkour isn’t about what you can’t do—it’s about what you can.”

“I believe I’ll stick to working out in my living room to my exercise dance DVDs, thank you very much. Somewhere no one can see how awkward I look when I move.”

He wanted to press her but sensed this wasn’t the time. Plus, this was the first time he’d really spoken to her—brief chitchat at church or his family’s grocery store didn’t count—and he didn’t want to give her the wrong impression about parkour. Or about him.

“What about your daughter? Do you think she might enjoy parkour?”

Rachel voraciously shook her head, her dark hair flipping over one shoulder.

“Oh, no. She needs to concentrate on her academics right now if she’s going to get into a good college. She didn’t pass two of her classes last year and consequently is in summer school right now. It’s not that she’s not smart,” she modified. “She just hasn’t been applying herself lately. I’m trying to encourage her to do better in summer school. Anyway, sports aren’t really Zooey’s thing.”

“Did I hear my name?” Seth’s gaze shifted to the teenager who’d jogged up to Rachel. Zooey was a pretty, dark-haired, dark-eyed teenager who looked a lot like her mother. The girl dropped onto her knees next to the picnic basket and flashed a friendly smile at Seth.

“I was telling Seth here what a pickle you are, taking over the bidding on my behalf.”

Zooey stuck out her tongue at Rachel and reached for the plate Rachel handed her. “Someone had to do it. You don’t mind, do you, Seth?”

He chuckled. “No, of course not. In fact, I’m thinking this day turned out rather well.”

“Ha. Told you, Mom.” She picked up a chicken drumstick, took a bite and pointed it toward Seth.

“Have you tried your chicken yet? My mom makes the best fried chicken ever.”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Rachel admonished. “And we haven’t said grace yet.”

Seth had been reaching for his chicken breast, but he stopped midmovement at Rachel’s reminder that they needed to pray before their meal.

It wasn’t something he was used to doing—not since his youth when he lived with his parents. He was used to diving straight into his meal, and this meal definitely seemed worth diving into. His stomach growled when the delectable, greasy smell of fried chicken reached his nose, and his mouth watered in anticipation. He usually limited himself to grilled meat served with lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, but he wasn’t about to pass up homemade fried chicken.

This was a special occasion, right?

It was all he could do not to take a bite of his chicken, but he restrained himself and politely bowed his head.

“Would you like to say grace?”

With his eyes closed, he didn’t immediately realize Rachel was speaking to him.

“Seth?”

His eyes popped open to find Rachel and Zooey both staring at him.

“I—er—I’m more of a Christmas and Easter kind of man. So I—Well, I’m out of practice. You go ahead.” His voice sounded stilted and awkward, even to him.

“I’m sorry. I just assumed—I see your parents and sister at church every Sunday. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t,” he assured her, even though he was itching in his skin.

He searched his mind for a way to describe his current relationship with the Lord, but nothing sounded right. It was too complicated for casual conversation. He believed in God, but God hadn’t always been there for him.

Certainly not lately. Not when it really counted.

He was relieved when she spoke, removing the need for a coherent explanation.

“Let’s thank the Lord for our food.”

Quietly and with gentle reverence, she offered heartfelt gratitude for the food, the day and the company.

Seth shifted uncomfortably. He’d been raised in a Christian home and, since he’d returned from the army, occasionally attended church services with his family, but religion didn’t play a big part in his life anymore.

He cracked his eyes open to watch Rachel pray and noticed he wasn’t the only one feeling uncomfortable. Zooey’s eyes were also open, her gaze on her folded hands. Or rather, she was frowning at her clenched hands. He was surprised she didn’t seem tapped into faith. He certainly had been at her age, with his family’s example all around him, and from the way that Rachel prayed, it was clear that faith was important to her and played a big role in her home.

Rachel’s grace wasn’t dry or bottled, but rather she spoke from her heart, which Seth admired and, if he was being honest, envied. He missed the innocence of his youth, of a faith that transcended the trials of daily life, but he’d seen far too much of the world not to question what he believed.