Juliet Bell - The Other Wife

All I wanted to do was crawl back through the big glass doors to a place where I was safe from falling. The chair was light. I should have been able to lift it off myself quite easily, but it wouldn’t budge. Something, someone, was holding it down. I wriggled as much as I could and caught a glimpse of a pair of feet; feet that were still safely on the soft carpet.

‘Help me up.’

The feet didn’t move. There was the sound of laughter.

‘Please…’ I pushed against the chair.

‘What is going on here?’ At last someone lifted the chair out of the way. A rough hand grabbed me by the arm and hauled me to my feet. I darted back into the room where it was safe, backing away from the open door, trying very hard not to cry.

My cousin John was standing just inside the door. He was smiling, not a friendly smile, but a nasty, tight smile. It was the sort of smile I had never seen before. Nobody at home smiled like that.

‘What on earth were you doing out there at this hour of the morning? Come on, girl. Stop your snivelling.’ Mrs Reed towered over me, and, try as I might, I could not stop sobbing. My whole body was shaking with fear.

‘What’s that in your hand?’ Mrs Reed grabbed my closed hand and slowly prised the fingers opened to reveal the broken biscuit still tightly clutched inside.

‘Have you been stealing food?’

‘Stealing? No! I don’t steal.’ My sobs stopped.

‘This …’ Mrs Reed slapped my hand and broken bits of biscuit fell onto the soft clean carpet. ‘You took this from the cupboard, didn’t you?’

I nodded. Of course I took it from the cupboard. That’s what we always did at home. It wasn’t stealing. You took what you needed and everybody shared. ‘I was hungry…’

‘Hungry? Selfish child. You can’t just take food when you want too. Stealing is a sin. And today is Sunday. We go to church on Sundays and we don’t eat anything before we go to church. You will be praying for God’s forgiveness. You wicked, ungrateful girl.’

‘I’m not wicked!’

The slap was as sudden as it was painful. I staggered backwards, clutching my stinging cheek. My eyes filled with tears all over again. No-one had ever hit me before, not even my mother.

‘We will not mention this incident again. Go to your room and get ready for church.’

I went to my room.

In the mirror in my room I could see that my right cheek was red where Mrs Reed had slapped me. I had to get ready for church. I’d never been to church before. I wasn’t really sure what church was, but I decided to put on the best dress I’d brought with me. Maybe then Mrs Reed would see that I was trying to be good. I turned to get it and saw that John Reed was standing in my open doorway, with that same smile on his face again. He was eating a chocolate biscuit.

Betty

Betty sat quietly next to Daddy in the cold office. The chair had scratchy material on it and she wriggled in her seat to try to pull her dress down to cover her legs. The grown-ups were talking in low, quiet voices.

‘So it will only be for a few weeks. Less than that probably. Her mother…’ Daddy turned his head and smiled at Betty. ‘She can’t look after her just at the moment, but when she’s back everything will be all right again.’

The man opposite Daddy on the other side of the big desk nodded curtly. Betty swung her legs while the two men filled in forms and signed papers. Then Daddy lifted her up out of the seat. ‘So you’re going to have a lovely holiday here with lots of other children. And me and Mummy will come back and get you really soon.’

Betty’s bottom lip started to quiver. ‘Do I have to go? I want to stay with you.’

‘Really, really soon. I promise, little firefly. All right?’

Daddy’s eyes looked like he was about to cry. Betty rested her head on his shoulder. ‘It’s OK, Daddy.’

He took a deep breath and smiled as he set her down on the ground. ‘That’s right. You need to be very brave for me and remember that everything’s OK. I love you, but while Mummy is away, I can’t keep you with me. As soon as Mummy comes home, I’ll come back. I promise.’

The stranger ushered Daddy out of the office and Betty was alone.

A few minutes later, a lady came into the room and picked up Betty’s little case. ‘Come on.’

She followed the lady along long white corridors and into a big bedroom with lots of beds in it. The lady popped her case on one of them. ‘You’ll be here. You can put your things in here.’ She pointed at a cupboard next to the bed. ‘Quickly now. Chop-chop!’

She flicked the case open and started lifting Betty’s things into the cupboard. Betty watched. It seemed silly. She’d just have to put them all back in her case very soon when Daddy came back.

Betty couldn’t count how many days and nights she was in the home. She slept in a big room with other children. Little ones, like Betty, at one end, and bigger girls further down. She didn’t like having so many people sleeping in the same room. Some of the girls cried at night, and that made Betty want to cry too. During the day they did chores, and the bigger girls did reading. Whatever she was doing, Betty waited. She waited for Mummy and Daddy to come back and take her home. So when one of the ladies who usually looked after the little babies, came and told her to bring her coat and hat, and her little suitcase with her pyjamas and hairbrush, she thought it was time.

She climbed into the back of the car waiting outside and was surprised to find two boys, both a couple of years older than her, already sitting there. The lady sat in the front with the driver, who was the man from the office from the very first day. He looked over into the back seat and frowned when he saw Betty.

‘What’s she doing here? We’re only supposed to send white children.’

‘She’s white enough.’

‘She’s half-breed. You saw her father.’

‘I did. But they won’t. And if you didn’t know, you’d think she was white, wouldn’t you?’

The driver turned around and stared directly at Betty. ‘She’s got that hair.’

‘Well, stick it under her hat when we get there and tell her not to say anything.’

Betty patted her hair. It had tight little curls like Daddy’s but in the sunshine it looked ginger like Mummy’s. Daddy said it was special. Daddy said her hair shone like a beautiful flame.

Betty felt her stomach flip. ‘Where are we going?’

‘On an adventure.’

‘Will my mummy and daddy be there?’

The woman twisted in her seat to look at Betty. ‘Your mummy and daddy are gone. We’re sending you somewhere that you’re wanted. You’ll have a far better home than with … him. Now be quiet.’ Betty did as she was told. She stared out of the window trying to remember the places they were driving past so she could find her way back, but they drove for too long and eventually it got dark. Betty’s eyes fell closed.

When she opened them again, the car had stopped. Rain was lashing down, which meant nobody thought it was odd that the woman rammed Betty’s hat onto her head and tucked her hair away inside. ‘Come on now.’

Betty was dragged along by the woman’s tight grip on her hand. The two boys ran along behind. They were by the sea, but not the seaside like when Mummy and Daddy had taken her for a day out on the beach at Scarborough. There was no beach here, just buildings and the ships were much bigger than the fishing boats Daddy had taken her to see. The woman stopped in front of a man with a clipboard, who ticked some items off his list and then pointed them towards a metal bridge leading to the biggest ship Betty had ever seen. She couldn’t get on a ship. Ships went over the sea. If she went over the sea, Mummy and Daddy would never find her. ‘But my daddy’s coming back for me.’