Eugene Lambert - The Sign of One

‘Your dressings, Kyle, take them off. Show Sky your healing.’

My collar is still turned up against the rain, so Rona can’t see they’re gone already. ‘Are you out of your mind?’

‘Just do as I say!’

I throw my hands up. If Rona asked me to sing ‘Oh, My Saviour’, all twenty verses, I couldn’t be more gobsmacked. Show this stranger my twist healing? Yeah, sure. Why not? For the second time this evening, I unbutton my shirt.

Rona twitches, seeing my already bare neck and chest.

The girl’s eyes narrow as they flicker over what’s left of my wounds. She purses her mouth as if choking poison down. I expect her to scream or make a run for it like Jude. Instead, she just frowns, as if she’s seen this before.

‘Blaster burns, that what you said?’

‘A week ago, low power maybe, but point-blank range,’ says Rona, all healer matter-of-fact now. ‘He was in a terrible state, but now look at him.’

Sky darts one last venomous look at me, then throws Rona a little nod.

‘ O-kay then,’ she says, sounding half-strangled.

‘Okay,’ echoes Rona. ‘Good.’

Whatever they’ve agreed, it looks like it’s on again.

‘Will somebody please tell me what the hell is going on?’ I say.

Rona ignores me. She marches over to the table and starts stuffing my backpack again. She’s got her back to me, but I can tell from how stiff it is and the way she’s punching the gear in, she’s furious.

Well, I don’t care. I’m angry too. At her – at Jude – at the whole world.

‘Off you go,’ she says to me, handing me my pack with a grunt. ‘Follow Sky; she knows the way. I’ll join you later, soon as I’m done here.’

‘No.’ I sling the pack back on to the table.

‘Oh, don’t you start,’ Rona says, her voice rising.

‘This is crazy! I’m not going anywhere,’ I say. My voice wobbles. I see the windjammer girl out of the corner of my eye, sneering. ‘I’ve had it with not knowing what’s going on. I’m staying right here until you tell me everything.’

Rona twitches. ‘We haven’t got time for this, Kyle.’

I shake my head and stare at the floor until I hear my mother’s sigh.

‘Sky,’ she says, ‘maybe you could give us a minute?’

I look up now. The girl stares at Rona, then at me. I see the hostility, but something else too. Curiosity? Maybe, but a blink and it’s gone. She shrugs her jacket on over her thin shoulders. ‘Whatever, but remember we ain’t got all night.’

The door bangs shut behind her.

Silence. My heart thrashing, my head thumping. Neither of us able to look the other in the eye. I feel numb and empty inside.

‘Sit down,’ Rona says at last. ‘And button your shirt.’

I do as she says. She sits opposite me and sighs again. My heart tries to batter through my ribs, but I stay quiet. I don’t want sighs – I want answers.

‘Please tell me you didn’t go see Jude.’ she says.

I roll my eyes. She curses, making me jump, but then takes my hand.

‘Listen, I’ve sorted us a trip out of here on that girl’s windjammer, no questions asked, to somewhere safe. I can’t imagine how you know each other, but she can be trusted. You must do as she says though. Promise me that.’

‘Fine,’ I say through gritted teeth.

‘Good. That’s good,’ says Rona.

She glances at the closed door, as if she can see through the wood to Sky waiting impatiently outside.

I pull my hand away. ‘Why is this happening to me?’

‘It’s too long a story,’ she says, with a tired shake of her head. ‘Try and be sensible, Kyle. I’ll tell you everything later, I promise you I will.’

Try and be sensible?

Oh sure. Turns out I’m the bane of Wrath.

A monster so awful that I make my girlfriend’s skin crawl.

I smash my fist on to the table, sending stuff flying. I jump up, sweep my backpack to the floor, kick my chair across the room. ‘This is all your fragging fault! You should have told me. You should’ve stopped this happening. You –’

And I say some terrible things.

Rona doesn’t flinch, just watches me as I rage and stamp about. When I stop, panting and helpless, she’s there to gather me in her arms. She pulls me close. I sense then how she’s trying to be strong for both of us.

‘I’m sorry,’ I whisper, ashamed.

‘So am I,’ she says. She pulls back and does her best to smile, but her eyes are shiny with sadness. ‘More sorry than you can ever know.’ She dabs at her eyes with a rag.

I feel a stab of guilt. I’ve seen her bleak before, but never cry.

‘When you were little,’ she says, ‘I told myself the less you knew about your past, the better it would be. Life’s tough enough, I thought.’ She clicks her tongue. ‘When you got older, I think I’d just got into the habit of keeping secrets.’

She takes my hands again. This time I don’t pull away.

‘Right or wrong, everything I did, I did for you. You must know that.’

A tear escapes down her face, drips off her chin onto my wrist.

‘I didn’t mean those things I said,’ I tell her.

‘I know,’ she says. ‘Kyle, you’re frightened and you’re confused. With everything that’s happened to you, I can’t blame you for being angry. And we all say things we regret when we’re angry. It’s only . . . human.’

‘You’re sure I’m not a monster?’

‘Kyle, you’re no monster,’ she says, looking me in the eye. ‘Believe me.’

I think about that caged creature I saw at the Peace Fair.

‘But what am I then?’

She gives her head a little shake. ‘Just a boy who heals quickly. And maybe you’re stronger and faster than other boys. Different – that’s all. No twisted blood. Not evil. On any other world, it wouldn’t be a curse, it’d be a blessing.’

I’m shocked. ‘Isn’t that heresy?’

‘Heresy? Hah, that’s what they’d like you to think.’

She leads me back to the table and puts her hands to her cheeks, which drags her skin down so taut she looks a hundred years old. ‘You must understand, this whole rotten world is built on lies. Our so-called Saviour is the biggest liar of all. Nothing is what it seems, not even me. But the biggest lie of all is that kids like you will grow up to be monsters. Whatever happens, never believe that.’ She sighs. ‘Just listen to me, droning on all self-righteous about lies. I may not have lied to you, Kyle, but I’ve hidden the truth and that’s just as wicked. I’ve been a fool.’

I reach over and cover her cold fingers with my warm ones.

‘So tell me the truth.’

Rona shifts uneasily, looks past me, at something that isn’t in the room.

‘The truth? The truth is that you’re in great danger now, Kyle. And not only because of what you are, but because of who you are.’

‘Huh?’ I say, not sure I heard this right.

But Rona doesn’t explain. Instead she throws her head back and stares up at the ceiling. I look too. For one mad second, I half expect to see her secrets carved into the rough-hewn rafters, but all I see are bugwebs and shadows.

‘Okay,’ I say, fighting to keep frustration out of my voice, ‘when I asked if you knew about me being different, you said you weren’t sure. You said something else like there was always a chance it was me . What did you mean by that?’

I squeeze her hand, until she looks at me.

‘Even as a healer I couldn’t tell,’ she says, her voice a whisper. ‘After you shrugged off the swamp pox, I thought it likely. But I wasn’t sure until a few days ago. You see, Kyle –’ She hesitates, a vein squirming at her temple. ‘I suppose deep down I’d always hoped that it wasn’t you, that it was your brother.’