Myrna Mackenzie - Cowgirl Makes Three / Her Secret Rival

Ivy’s heart flipped over. Her throat closed up. There was a pain in her chest, and yet…this was a child, an innocent child. She couldn’t run away and risk hurting Lily’s feelings. “His name is Bunny?” she asked, with the best smile she could manage.

“Not Bunny. Buh-ny,” Lily enunciated with a chuckle. “See? Bunny?” and she held out one hand palm up as if she was sure she had cleared everything up.

“Sorry,” Noah said, reaching out and swinging Lily into his arms. “She’s quick as lightning, and she sneaks off now and then. Come on, squirt, let’s go put Barney to bed.”

“Yes. Bunny ti-red,” Lily agreed.

“Oh, I see. Barney, ” Ivy said.

Lily squirmed in her father’s arms and turned so that she was facing Ivy. “Yes!” she squealed. “Bye-bye.”

“Bye, sweetie.”

Noah carried her away, his long legs quickly taking them both out of view.

Ivy dropped to a chair and stared at her hands. She could hear Noah murmuring. She heard the little girl say, “Wuv you, Da. Wuv you, Mar-ta.”

Ivy closed her eyes. She concentrated on breathing, on not thinking of Bo. She should get up and leave. But she didn’t. When Noah came back, she looked straight up into his eyes. “Don’t even consider apologizing. This is your home. It’s Lily’s home, and she’s adorable. I’m the intruder. I’m the one with the problem, and if the tables were turned, I wouldn’t want to feel I had to apologize because Bo had acted the way a child acts. She’s a sweetheart, Noah. I recognize that. How could I not?”

“But it still hurts to see her.”

“It’s more than that.”

“Tell me.”

She hesitated, couldn’t find her voice for a minute. She wasn’t sure how to say the next thing, so she moved to the door, pulled it open and stepped outside, dragging in great breaths of air.

Noah followed on her heels, shutting the door behind him. “Ivy? Are you okay? Is there anything I can do? Anything? ”

And that concern jarred the words loose. “I didn’t save him. What if I could have prevented it?” Her words came out in a choked whisper.

“You couldn’t have. You weren’t even driving.” So he had obviously looked up the story—or been told about it.

“But I knew Alden liked to gamble, and that included gambling that he wouldn’t get pulled over for speeding, because he liked to drive too fast. He laughed whenever I asked him to slow down. And even though it’s been two years, sometimes I still wake up at night and dream that I can live that day over. In my dream I’m not distracted by something else. I’m paying attention and I realize that Alden is in a mood and I keep Bo home. That’s all it would have taken. Something that simple. Just that one little decision. If—”

“Don’t,” he said, grasping her arms in his big hands. “You didn’t kill your child, Ivy. You weren’t driving,” he reiterated. “And your husband wasn’t listening to you.”

Ivy wanted nothing more than to listen to Noah, to lean into his big body and let him comfort her. He was right. She knew that. And yet he was wrong, too. When Bo had been born, she had promised herself that she would never do anything to hurt him. She had arrogantly believed that she was a much better mother than her own had been. And now she couldn’t trust herself. She could never risk having and losing a child again. How could anyone risk having that happen to them again?

Still, the incident today had changed things.

“I don’t want you to hide Lily anymore. This is her home, her ranch, her everything. I’ll be the one to make the adjustments. If our paths cross…well, I think I handled it okay today. I didn’t make her uncomfortable, did I?”

He smiled gently and tucked a finger beneath her chin. “You didn’t. She liked you.”

“How could you tell?”

“I just can. She talked to you. Usually she has to meet a person several times before her shy wears off.”

Ivy smiled a bit at that. “Well, I’d better get back to work. I take it that the dishwasher wasn’t really broken. That’s why Marta called me in.”

“Not broken, I don’t think. But I’ll check.” He turned to go.

“Noah?”

He turned back.

“Thank you.”

“What for?”

For not being angry that I have so much trouble being near your little sweetheart of a daughter. But there’d been too much emotion coursing through her this morning already. She’d been on the verge of throwing herself into his arms only moments ago. She needed to lighten things up.

“For going to the feed and seed and telling tales. I like Diane.”

“And you don’t mind the extra work after hours?”

“It won’t be work. And she’s only one woman.”

“Hmm,” he said.

“What does that mean?”

“Maybe…there were a lot of men other than Jimmie at the feed and seed. Some of them have wives.”

Ivy smiled. “Well, I doubt that any more women will show up. Diane is unique. But if they do come for makeovers, at least they won’t be pretending to talk to me while staring at your muscles. I’ve been tempted to say something really outrageous just to see if they’re actually paying attention.”

He grinned at that. “Maybe I should just stare at your… um…muscles while talking to the women and see how they like it.”

Ivy opened her mouth, then shut it. Walking away, heading she didn’t know where, she hoped Noah didn’t put words to deeds. If he started giving her another one of those lazy looks that roamed up and down her body, she might make a fool of herself in front of someone who would carry the tale back to every other woman in town. The very thought made her hyperventilate.

It also made her think of Noah’s muscles and his strong hands.

She ordered herself to behave. A woman had to be on her toes when she spent her days around animals that could crush a person without even realizing it. “So no more Noah stuff,” she ordered.

“Hmm, wonder what she means by that, Brody,” Darrell said. Ivy hadn’t realized the men were right inside the barn.

“It means I’m in the mood to crack some heads together if you two insist on teasing me and listening in on my mutterings,” she said with a wicked grin.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Brody answered, pretending ignorance. “I didn’t hear any muttering. Did you say something, Ivy?”

“If I did, I didn’t say anything important,” she said. That much was true. She couldn’t let Noah become important. Her heart couldn’t handle any more breaks.

Noah was beginning to wonder what he was doing. A couple of weeks ago he’d been minding his own business, with no thoughts of anything but the ranch and Lily.

Now he was thinking of how warm Ivy’s skin had been against his palms through the cotton of her shirt. He was remembering a pair of tortured blue-violet eyes wondering if she’d missed a chance to save her child. He was going to the feed and seed, acting totally out of character and doing really stupid things all because he wanted some justice for her.

Careful, buddy, he told himself. Don’t do anything you’ll end up regretting. He really should just stick to Lily and the ranch. Period. Especially since being a father was such a seat-of-the-pants thing with him. Was he wrong keeping Lily here instead of sending her out into the world…or at least into Tallula? He didn’t know. All he knew was that Lily was his. That first step into the world of Tallula and other people would be her first step away from him. Was it wrong to want to stave that off a little longer?

Maybe, but a stubborn part of him didn’t want to even be wondering these things. These questions about how he should handle Lily hadn’t come from inside him. They had come via Ivy, the same woman he’d just been warning himself about.