A to Z Classics - Complete Works Of Oscar Wilde (Best Navigation) (A to Z Classics)

[ Enter Phipps .]

lord goring

My dear Robert, of course. Oh! [ To Phipps .] Bring some hock and seltzer.

phipps

Yes, my lord.

lord goring

And Phipps!

phipps

Yes, my lord.

·143· lord goring

Will you excuse me for a moment, Robert? I want to give some directions to my servant.

sir robert chiltern

Certainly.

lord goring

When that lady calls, tell her that I am not expected home this evening. Tell her that I have been suddenly called out of town. You understand?

phipps

The lady is in that room, my lord. You told me to show her into that room, my lord.

lord goring

You did perfectly right. [ Exit Phipps .] What a mess I am in. No; I think I shall get through it. I’ll give her a lecture through the door. Awkward thing to manage, though.

sir robert chiltern

Arthur, tell me what I should do. My life seems to have crumbled about me. I am a ship without a rudder in a night without a star.

lord goring

Robert, you love your wife, don’t you?

·144· sir robert chiltern

I love her more than anything in the world. I used to think ambition the great thing. It is not. Love is the great thing in the world. There is nothing but love, and I love her. But I am defamed in her eyes. I am ignoble in her eyes. There is a wide gulf between us now. She has found me out, Arthur, she has found me out.

lord goring

Has she never in her life done some folly—some indiscretion—that she should not forgive your sin?

sir robert chiltern

My wife! Never! She does not know what weakness or temptation is. I am of clay like other men. She stands apart as good women do—pitiless in her perfection—cold and stern and without mercy. But I love her, Arthur. We are childless, and I have no one else to love, no one else to love me. Perhaps if God had sent us children she might have been kinder to me. But God has given us a lonely house. And she has cut my heart in two. Don’t let us talk of it. I was brutal to her this evening. But I suppose when sinners talk to saints they are brutal always. I said to her things that were hideously true, on my side, from my stand-point, from the standpoint of men. But don’t let us talk of that.

·145· lord goring

Your wife will forgive you. Perhaps at this moment she is forgiving you. She loves you, Robert. Why should she not forgive?

sir robert chiltern

God grant it! God grant it! [ Buries his face in his hands .] But there is something more I have to tell you, Arthur.

[ Enter Phipps with drinks .]

phipps

[ Hands hock and seltzer to Sir Robert Chiltern .] Hock and seltzer, sir.

sir robert chiltern

Thank you.

lord goring

Is your carriage here, Robert?

sir robert chiltern

No; I walked from the club.

lord goring

Sir Robert will take my cab, Phipps.

phipps

Yes, my lord. [ Exit .]

·146· lord goring

Robert, you don’t mind my sending you away?

sir robert chiltern

Arthur, you must let me stay for five minutes. I have made up my mind what I am going to do to-night in the House. The debate on the Argentine Canal is to begin at eleven. [ A chair falls in the drawing-room .] What is that?

lord goring

Nothing.

sir robert chiltern

I heard a chair fall in the next room. Some one has been listening.

lord goring

No, no; there is no one there.

sir robert chiltern

There is some one. There are lights in the room, and the door is ajar. Some one has been listening to every secret of my life. Arthur, what does this mean?

lord goring

Robert, you are excited, unnerved. I tell you there is no one in that room. Sit down, Robert.

·147· sir robert chiltern

Do you give me your word that there is no one there?

lord goring

Yes.

sir robert chiltern

Your word of honour? [ Sits down .]

lord goring

Yes.

sir robert chiltern

[ Rises .] Arthur, let me see for myself.

lord goring

No, no.

sir robert chiltern

If there is no one there why should I not look in that room? Arthur, you must let me go into that room and satisfy myself. Let me know that no eavesdropper has heard my life’s secret. Arthur, you don’t realize what I am going through.

lord goring

Robert, this must stop. I have told you that there is no one in that room—that is enough.

·148· sir robert chiltern

[ Rushes to the door of the room .] It is not enough. I insist on going into this room. You have told me there is no one there, so what reason can you have for refusing me?

lord goring

For God’s sake, don’t! There is some one there. Some one whom you must not see.

sir robert chiltern

Ah, I thought so!

lord goring

I forbid you to enter that room.

sir robert chiltern

Stand back. My life is at stake. And I don’t care who is there. I will know who it is to whom I have told my secret and my shame. [ Enters room .]

lord goring

Great Heavens! his own wife!

[ Sir Robert Chiltern comes back, with a look of scorn and anger on his face .]

sir robert chiltern

What explanation have you to give me for the presence of that woman here?

·149· lord goring

Robert, I swear to you on my honour that that lady is stainless and guiltless of all offence towards you.

sir robert chiltern

She is a vile, an infamous thing!

lord goring

Don’t say that, Robert! It was for your sake she came here. It was to try and save you she came here. She loves you and no one else.

sir robert chiltern

You are mad. What have I to do with her intrigues with you? Let her remain your mistress! You are well suited to each other. She, corrupt and shameful—you, false as a friend, treacherous as an enemy even——

lord goring

It is not true, Robert. Before heaven, it is not true. In her presence and in yours I will explain all.

sir robert chiltern

Let me pass, sir. You have lied enough upon your word of honour.

[ Sir Robert Chiltern goes out. Lord Goring rushes to the door of the drawing-room, when Mrs. Cheveley comes out, looking radiant and much amused .]

·150· mrs. cheveley

[ With a mock curtsey .] Good evening, Lord Goring!

lord goring

Mrs. Cheveley! Great Heavens! … May I ask what you were doing in my drawing-room?

mrs. cheveley

Merely listening. I have a perfect passion for listening through keyholes. One always hears such wonderful things through them.

lord goring

Doesn’t that sound rather like tempting Providence?

mrs. cheveley

Oh! surely Providence can resist temptation by this time. [ Makes a sign to him to take her cloak off, which he does .]

lord goring

I am glad you have called. I am going to give you some good advice.

mrs. cheveley

Oh! pray don’t. One should never give a woman anything that she can’t wear in the evening.

·151· lord goring

I see you are quite as wilful as you used to be.

mrs. cheveley

Far more! I have greatly improved. I have had more experience.

lord goring

Too much experience is a dangerous thing. Pray have a cigarette. Half the pretty women in London smoke cigarettes. Personally I prefer the other half.

mrs. cheveley

Thanks. I never smoke. My dressmaker wouldn’t like it, and a woman’s first duty in life is to her dressmaker, isn’t it? What the second duty is, no one has as yet discovered.

lord goring

You have come here to sell me Robert Chiltern’s letter, haven’t you?

mrs. cheveley

To offer it to you on conditions. How did you guess that?