II. 4. Table of Contents |
Scene 4. Table of Contents |
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( An hour has elapsed. ) enter Pythodicus bringing cooks, Anthrax and Congrio , music girls, Phrygia and Eleusium and attendants, with provisions from the market and two lambs. |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Postquam obsonavit erus et conduxit coquos tibicinasque hasce apud forum, edixit mihi ut dispertirem obsonium hic bifariam. |
( importantly ) After master did the marketing and hired the cooks and these music girls at the forum, he told me to take and divide all he'd got into two parts. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Me quidem hercle, dicam tibi palam, non divides. si quo tu totum me ire vis, operam dabo. |
By Jupiter, you shan't make two parts of me, let me tell you that plainly! If you'd like to have the whole of me anywhere, why, I'll accommodate you. |
Cong. |
Cong. |
Bellum et pudicum vero prostibulum popli. post si quis vellet, te hand non velles dividi. |
( to Anthrax ) You pretty boy, yes, you nice little everybody's darling, you! Why, if anyone wanted to make two parts of a real man out of you, you oughtn't to be cut up about it. |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Atque ego istuc, Anthrax, alio vorsum dixeram, non istuc quo tu insimulas. sed erus nuptias meus hodie faciet. |
Now, now, Anthrax, I mean that otherwise from what you make out. Look here, my master's marrying to-day. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Cuius ducit filiam? |
Who's the lady? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Vicini huius Euclionis senis e proximo. ei adeo obsoni hinc iussit dimidium dari, cocum alterum itidemque alteram tibicinam. |
Daughter of old Euclio that lives next door here. Yes sir, and what's more, he's to have half this stuff here, and one cook and one music girl, too, so master said. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Nempe huc dimidium dicis, dimidium domum? |
You mean to say half goes to him and half to you folks? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Nempe sicut dicis. |
Just what I do mean. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Quid? hic non poterat de suo senex obsonari filiai nuptiis? |
I say, couldn't the old boy pay for the catering for his daughter's wedding his own self? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Vah. |
( scornfully ) Pooh! |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Quid negotist? |
What's the matter? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Quid negoti sit rogas? pumex non aeque est aridus atque hic est senex. |
The matter, eh? You couldn't squeeze as much out of that old chap as you could out of a pumice stone. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Ain tandem? |
( incredulously ) Oh, really now! |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Ita esse ut dixi. tute existuma: quin divom atque hominum clamat continue fidem, 2suam rem periisse seque eradicarier, de suo tigillo fumus si qua exit foras. quin cum it dormitum, follem obstringit ob gulam. |
That's a fact. Judge for yourself. Why, I tell you he begins bawling for heaven and earth to witness that he's bankrupt, gone to everlasting smash, the moment a puff of smoke from his beggarly fire manages to get out of his house. Why, when he goes to bed he strings a bag over his jaws. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Cur? |
What for? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Ne quid animae forte amittat dormiens. |
So as not to chance losing any breath when he's asleep. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Etiamue obturat inferiorem gutturem, ne quid animai forte amittat dormiens? |
Oh yes! And he puts a stopper on his lower windpipe, doesn't he, so as not to chance losing any breath while he's asleep? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Haec mihi te ut tibi med aequom est, credo, credere. |
( ingenuously ) You should believe me, I believe, just as I should believe you. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Immo equidem credo. |
( hurriedly ) Oh, no, no! I do believe, of course! |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
At scin etiam quomodo? aquam hercle plorat, cum lavat, profundere. |
But listen to this, will you? Upon my word, after he takes a bath it just breaks him all up to throw away the water. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Censen talentum magnum exorari pote ab istoc sene ut det, qui fiamus liberi? |
D'ye think the old buck could be induced to make us a present of a couple of hundred pounds to buy ourselves off with? |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Famem hercle utendam si roges, numquam dabit. quin ipsi pridem tonsor unguis dempserat: collegit, omnia abstulit praesegmina. |
Lord! He wouldn't make you a loan of his hunger, no sir, not if you begged him for it. Why, the other day when a barber cut his nails for him he collected all the clippings and took 'em home. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Edepol mortalem parce parcum praedicas. |
My goodness, he's quite a tight one, from what you say. |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Censen vero adeo esse parcum et miserum vivere? pulmentum pridem ei eripuit milvos: homo ad praetorem plorabundus devenit; infit ibi postulare plorans, eiulans, ut sibi liceret milvom vadarier. sescenta sunt quae memorem, si sit otium. sed uter vestrorum est celerior? memora mihi. |
Honest now, would you believe a man could be so tight and live so wretched? Once a kite flew off with a bit of food of his: down goes the fellow to the magistrate's, blubbering all the way, and there he begins, howling and yowling, demanding to have the kite bound over for trial. Oh, I could tell hundreds of stories about him if I had time. ( to both cooks ) But which of you is the quicker? Tell me that. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Ego, et multo melior. |
I am, and a whole lot better, too. |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Cocum ego, non furem rogo. |
At cooking I mean, not thieving. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Cocum ergo dico. |
Well, I mean cooking. |
Pyth. |
Pyth. |
Quid tu ais? |
( to Congrio ) And how about you? |
Cong. |
Cong. |
Sic sum ut vides. |
( with a meaning glance at Anthrax ) I'm what I look. |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Cocus ille nundinalest, in nonum diem solet ire coctum. |
He's nothing but a market-day cook, that chap: he only gets a job once a week. |
Cong. |
Cong. |
Tun, trium litterarum homo me vituperas? fur. |
You running me down, you? You five letter man, you! You T-H-I-E-F! |
Anthr. |
Anthr. |
Etiam fur, trifurcifer. |
Five letter man youself! Yes, and five times—penned! |