Dirk Lützelberger - Secret doors

"Exactly, the murderer is usually the gardener, and in the end, there is always some distant brother-in-law, cousin, or missing brother who happened to have a motive, opportunity, and means to commit the murder. Throughout the whole movie there is always a story told, where the killer never appears in it … and is captured, as in real life." Gwen twisted the corners of her mouth into a gloating smile and rejoiced when Stefan responded to her sarcasm.

"You’re right, almost like our last case."

"The scam?" Gwen wanted to make sure.

"Yeah, sure. Weeks of analysis of accounts, interviews with friends and relatives, research among colleagues, and everything else to later connect the son, who was currently spending a semester abroad for 'work and travel', with the crime."

"Stories of how life writes them. Now come over here, my hero." Gwen grinned boldly, knocked Stefan over on the couch and curled up tight beside him.

Gwen felt Stefan’s warmth on her back and pressed herself against him even more. She let her hips circle and felt how Stefan enjoyed the situation. He wrapped his arm around Gwen and held her tightly. While Gwen felt the emerging excitement behind her back, she closed her eyes to enjoy the situation.

She noticed her eyes becoming moist and a single tear collected in the corner of her eye. She squinted her eyes, swallowed once but could not keep the situation under control. She released herself from the embrace and sat up.

"What’s wrong?" Stefan asked in a soft voice and stroked her back and through her hair.

"Not now, please!" she replied curtly and gently took his hand.

"You know what’s going on, Stefan. It just keeps coming back up. There’s nothing I can do about it." She tried to keep her composure and hold back the tears, but she could feel her resistance getting weaker.

"I miss Paul so much, but I’m also very happy with you. Please don’t misunderstand me. I like you so much, but I’ve been married to Paul all these years. We have a son together. I thought I could easily overcome the situation by getting back to work and showing successes. But that only worked in the beginning. On my birthday I thought I had made it and overcome the loss. You were there, you were all there. You gave me stability and made me forget the terrible situation, but then it caught up with me again."

She slumped down and the next tears rose in her eyes. Gwen could feel the levees starting to break.

"What can I do for you, my dear. Please tell me!" Stefan tried to calm Gwen down.

"There’s not much you can do. I need time. I don’t know." Her tears began to flow.

"I feel so helpless. I want to be there for you, help you." Stefan left Gwen to her feelings. He was powerless and had never lost anyone close to him before and therefore could not feel what this meant. Gwen sobbed and cried. She let her emotions run free. After what felt like an eternity, Gwen came back to her breath and was able to say a few words between her sobs.

"Just … give me … time." Stefan nodded wordlessly and stroked her back again.

This time, Gwen was able to endure the caresses. She had calmed down a bit and started to think more clearly again.

"I could do with some time off" Gwen expressed her wishes.

"That sounds great" Stefan replied without sounding euphoric. He didn’t feel very comfortable in the situation and didn’t want to strain her unnecessarily by acting wrong.

"What do you suggest?" he asked cautiously. "What would do you good?"

Gwen was thinking. Get away! Far away! But what about Phil? What if her mother got worse? She’s not that young either! You should be able to get home quickly, and not drive so far away. But with a plane you can get home quite quickly from anywhere. But not from New Zealand, you stupid cow! Yeah, but it’d be okay if they go by car. Or we could drive just the two of us. That would be nice too, but Phil would be sad. Why can’t I find a good solution here? Paul would have known what to do. But he’s not here, and … I miss him so much.

Gwen took a deep breath in and out, trying to get the thoughts that were buzzing around in her head like flies into something orderly. Away! Not that far! Three of you! That sounded reasonable!

"I want to get out of here. With you and Phil together, but not that far away. I think a change of scenery would do me good."

"That’s a great idea. We’re on summer vacation and we could take time off over my 40 thbirthday. I had thought about that, but now that you brought it up, it makes total sense to me. Does it for you?"

Gwen looked at Stefan and tenderly took his cheeks in her hands. Then she pulled his face up to hers. She nodded and kissed him tenderly. She closed her reddened eyes and enjoyed the moment. After a while she released his face again. Stefan would have liked to enjoy the situation even longer and still felt the warmth of her kiss.

Gwen let herself fall to the back rest of the couch and imagined how she would like to spend her vacation.

She dreamed of white beaches, palm trees and warm water. But all the beautiful places that would offer something like that were either too far away or too expensive to spend a holiday there. She categorically ruled out the alternatives around the corner at the North and Baltic Sea. After all, she could have that just about every day. In northern direction there was only Denmark or maybe Sweden. But here there was no sun guarantee. It seemed to amount to a compromise. Instead of going to the sea and lying lazily on the beach, it would of course be a good idea to do something for your fitness and go hiking in the mountains. Maybe in the Austrian Alps. There was no guarantee of sunshine either, but at least the probability of rain was much lower than to the north. Gwen made friends with the idea and tried to put her ideas into words.

"We could render the mountains uncertain. I think some sport would do our fitness good and we could go hiking in Austria. What do you think?"

"Okay" Stefan replied hesitantly. "But will you get enough relaxation and variety there?" he asked back.

"If we choose a nice place and spend a few days just loafing around there, we’ll manage" she replied, partly in Austrian slang, and giggled.

Stefan raised his thumb to signal that he agreed.

"This is how we do it. Next step is to see the travel agency tomorrow and book, so that we don’t change our mind. And we’ll talk to Phil when he gets home."

"You’re right!" Gwen confirmed Stefan’s intentions and relaxed inside. She was happy to have found a way to get some distance and switch off.

♦♦♦

Phil was torn between the joy of the upcoming holiday and frustration that he could no longer realize his plans with Benoît. In the end, however, the prospect of spending some time together with his mother and Stefan prevailed. Phil was very pragmatic about this. Just like his mother. If it was not one solution, it was another. There was always a way. Gwen had always taught him that way, passing on both her sunny disposition and optimism to Phil. Phil had gone straight to Benoît the next day to tell him the news. He didn’t know exactly where the holiday was going or what they were going to do, but it was going to be hiking in the mountains. That much virtually certain.

Gwen and Stefan had to work. After all, it was a normal weekday and even though it was school holidays, Gwen couldn’t watch Phil all day. At times Beth stepped in to check on things and to provide Phil with lunch. Beth had always been a family person and helped out whenever she could. Gwen liked to have her mother by her side, as she was not only a support in the difficult times since Paul’s death, but in her unobtrusive way she was always a welcome guest. In spite of her seventy-three years, Beth was still very fit and agile, which was certainly due to her interested and open nature, which led to her being taken along to all sorts of family activities. However, Beth and her daughter had quickly agreed on the phone last night that it was not a good idea for 'Granny' to be climbing mountains or hiking in the mountains. Beth wished, she should have a good time with Stefan and Phil and report back afterwards.