Эрин Хантер - A Forest Divided

“It’s me—Clear Sky,” he told her. He didn’t want her to call him Shaded Moss again.

“I know,” she murmured. Her gaze flicked to Gray Wing, then Jagged Peak. “All my sons are here.” There was satisfaction in her mew. “Don’t be sad when I’m gone. It will be a relief. I have had a long life, and a good one. I’ve known hunger and cold, but I’ve known love too.” She blinked softly at all three of them, her gaze coming to rest on Clear Sky. “And I forgive you, my firstborn. Shaded Moss has spoken to me. He explained…” Coughing took hold of her, racking her body until she convulsed helplessly on the heather.

“Quiet Rain!” Clear Sky leaned over her.

“Help her!” Jagged Peak called to Pebble Heart, who lingered, wide-eyed, in the entrance.

“There’s nothing more I can do,” Pebble Heart murmured.

The coughing eased, and Quiet Rain rasped as she struggled for breath. “Shaded Moss told me.”

“Told you what?” Clear Sky thrust his muzzle closer.

“Let her rest.” Jagged Peak reached out his paw and placed it gently on her flank. “She must save her strength.”

“Save her strength for what? She’s dying !” Clear Sky trembled. “What did Shaded Moss say?”

“It was all foretold,” Quiet Rain rasped. “You could not help what you did. It had to be that way.

I forgive you, Clear Sky, and now”—she drew in a shuddering breath—“you must forgive yourself.”

Clear Sky felt grief rush over him like a wave as Quiet Rain’s eyes clouded and grew dull. Her head dropped limply onto the heather and her flanks fell still.

Clear Sky pushed himself to his paws and, leaning over Quiet Rain, closed her lifeless eyes with gentle laps of his tongue.

Forgive yourself. Her words rang in his mind. For what? His thoughts whirled. So much had happened! What was the crime he was supposed to forgive himself for?

Weak daylight was seeping into the den. Eagle Feather’s mew rang across the camp. “The snow’s melting!”

Small paw steps splashed across the clearing.

Jagged Peak got wearily to his paws and padded from the den. Gray Wing followed, his tail dragging over the earth.

Clear Sky gazed at Quiet Rain, his heart breaking. If she’d never come here, I wouldn’t have had to watch this.

And yet a dark knowledge, deep in his belly, told him that these final moments with his mother would mark the rest of his life.

Thunder shuddered as a fat drop of water splashed onto his spine. The rainy day was giving way to night.

Beside him lay Quiet Rain’s body. Clear Sky and Gray Wing sat on either side, stiff in the dying light, while Jagged Peak shivered next to Sun Shadow.

They’d spent the day sitting vigil beside Quiet Rain. Around them Mud Paws, Fern, and Mouse

Ear had come and gone, bringing fresh-kill for the prey pile; Pebble Heart had sorted through the herbs he’d brought back from the hollow, while Star Flower stood by, helping where she could by wrapping the leaves he separated into neat bundles; Tall Shadow had crouched at the head of the clearing, solemnly watching over her camp. At sunhigh, the kits had crept quietly into the forest, Holly close at their heels. Through the afternoon, their excited squeaks sounded beyond the bramble wall of the camp, quickly hushed by their mother. They returned now, as dusk drew in.

“But why do we have to be quiet?” Dew Nose whispered as she led her littermates around the edge of the clearing.

“Out of respect for Quiet Rain,” Holly hissed.

Eagle Feather sniffed. “No one asked her to come here and die.”

“Hush!” Storm Pelt pawed his brother’s tail sharply. “She was kind to us, remember?”

Thunder glanced uneasily at Sun Shadow. What must he think? But the black tom didn’t blink, his eyes clouded with grief as he stared at the trees. Pity jabbed at Thunder’s heart. He came here to find his father, but now he is truly alone among strangers.

Tall Shadow straightened. The sun was an orange ball beyond the pines, silhouetting the dark trunks with fire. “We must bury her.”

Sun Shadow jerked his muzzle toward her. “Where? This is not her home.”

“Her kin are here.” Tall Shadow padded toward the young tom.

Sun Shadow returned her gaze silently.

Clear Sky lifted his chin. “She must be buried where we can all visit her grave.”

Gray Wing nodded. “On shared territory.”

“At the four trees?” Jagged Peak glanced at his brothers.

“She would be close to those she once knew,” Tall Shadow murmured solemnly.

Thunder pictured the battle grave. Now there would be another grave beside it. The grave of a cat who had died in peace, among those who had loved her. “I’ll help carry her there.”

“Me too.” Jagged Peak stood up.

Gray Wing got to his paws and stretched, wincing as his injured forepaw slipped on the slushy ground.

Tall Shadow nodded to Mud Paws, who was washing in his nest. “Will you guard the camp while we’re gone?”

Holly approached Jagged Peak. “Should we come with you?” She glanced at their kits, damp from playing in the snowmelt.

Jagged Peak shook his head. “Stay here.”

“I’ll come.” Pebble Heart padded from his den. “I should help bury her, since I failed to save her.”

Gray Wing brushed against the young tom. “She was old ,” he breathed. “It was her time.”

Thunder straightened, realizing how stiff he was. He shook out his pelt, relieved to feel warmth flowing back into his paws and tail.

Star Flower crossed the clearing and touched muzzles with Clear Sky. “River Ripple should be at her burial.”

Clear Sky frowned. “Why?”

“He is a leader, like you, Thunder, and Tall Shadow,” she meowed. “You are all petals of the same flower, remember?”

“And Wind Runner,” Gray Wing added, thinking of the camp on the moor. “Although… we are still giving her space.”

Clear Sky looked thoughtful. “You are right. We should leave Wind Runner in peace. But the rest of us should be together,” he mewed.

“I will get River Ripple,” Star Flower told him.

Thunder felt a sudden flash of gratitude toward the she-cat, but he noticed that Clear Sky’s pelt pricked uneasily.

“It’s too far for you to travel,” he argued.

Star Flower met his gaze. “Carrying kits does not weaken a cat; it makes her stronger.”

“I’ll go with her.” Tall Shadow stepped forward.

Thunder blinked in surprise at the warmth in her mew. And yet, why not? Hadn’t Star Flower been trying to make up for her betrayal in everything she did? She had not left Clear Sky’s side, she’d treated his mother with respect, and now she was offering to get River Ripple for the burial. Was it possible that she’d earned their trust at last?

Clear Sky dipped his head. “Okay,” he agreed. “We’ll meet you at the four trees.”

Tall Shadow headed for the camp entrance, waiting at the bramble tunnel while Star Flower touched muzzles with Clear Sky.

“Be careful,” he whispered.

“I will.”

As Star Flower turned and followed Tall Shadow from the camp, Jagged Peak leaned to push his muzzle beneath Quiet Rain. Thunder ducked to help, nosing the old she-cat’s body onto Jagged Peak’s shoulders and sliding in beside him. The first stiffness of death had left her, and she hung limp and cold between them.

Clear Sky led the way out of camp, Gray Wing following with Pebble Heart and Sun Shadow.