Dewey Lambdin - The King`s Coat

Claghome got to his feet and dragged their surgeon's mate to bed, and Alan and Tad slipped out on deck for some fresh air. There was none to be had. The harbor was as smooth as a millpond and not a capful of wind stirred. Parrot could almost roll on her beam-ends under bare poles in a stiff breeze, but she now lay as calm as a stone bridge. ’Damned hot for December," Purnell said quietly beside him, studying the many riding lights in the harbor. "We'll have some weather. Maybe a late storm. It's unreal for it to be so still and airless," Alan replied. "My, how salty we've become, for one dipped in brine so little time," Purnell softly jeered him. "I still say we'll get a shift of wind out of this," Alan insisted. "You mark my words.’

’Think enough to put up half a crown on it?" Tad pressed. ’Done. But you should know better. Pity to take your money so easy. Your brothers would know." Purnell's family were from Bristol, shipowners, traders, importers, and his older brothers were already merchant captains. Their clan was so absolutely stiff with the chink that Purnell clanked when he did a turn about the decks, but for all his money, he was all right as a mate. He did not compete with Lewrie for favor, and each had their own specialty. For Purnell, it was sail-handling and navigation-Lewrie was capable, but more at home with artillery and small arms. Tad Purnell was also a good fellow to know, fairly upright and honest in their dealings but still possessed of a sense of humor and a streak of deviltry that his family, and now the Navy, sat upon to keep from running riot.

Claghome emerged from the hatchway, his pipe still fuming, and a newspaper clutched in his hand for a long, contemplative visit to the heads. "Damn still," he said to them. "We'll get half a gale out of this right soon, I swear.’

’Sorry about your half a crown," Lewrie whispered, delighted to hear his opinion confirmed by an old tarpaulin man. "And I'll bet our 'live-lumber' will be casting up their accounts as soon as we get beyond the breakwater," Tad said happily. ’Just who is this Lord Cantner?" Lewrie asked Purnell after hearing Lieutenant Kenyon drop the name to his clerk Leonard earlier that afternoon. ’Rum old squint-a-pipes, tries to see six directions at once. He used to be a very big planter and trader out here before the war started. As big a cutthroat as a Mohawk. I heard he'd become one of Lord North's creatures, come to see if the war is still winnable. But most-like to collect what he can from his old estates.’

’Thing that amazes me is that he'd bring his wife out here to this place," Alan said. "It's a sickly climate for a woman. ’

‘Well, I hear she's much younger, and her dowry was worth a duke's ransom. Probably couldn't stand the thought of her being left back home with time on her hands.’

’Or someone else's hands on her." Alan leered. ’Look. Lewrie," Tad began, suddenly unsure of himself, "if we get ashore this time I was wondering… you seem to know a bit about the fairer sex, and I…" God help me but I really should become a pimp, Alan told himself; everyone seems to think I'm so topping good at it… "And the sound of our crew slaking their lust is driving you mad, is that it, Purnell?’

‘Well, I am fifteen now, almost sixteen, and I've spent the last three years of my life afloat. This ship seems my best chance," Purnell confessed. ’Probably cost you one guinea for a good bareback rider," Alan warned him with a grin, "and you have to be careful that you don't get a poxy one.’

’I don't know how to tell," Tad said, turning red at his own words, "but if you sort of gave me a fair wind, and a course to steer.. ‘. ’And you don't want to just hop on and hop off.’

’I don't know.. ‘. ’Whores can be right nice, if they know it's your first time," Alan said. "Kind of like the press-gang. If I had to go, why not you, too? Best way is to spend some time with her, have a stoup or two, get rigged properly, bear down and board her, and not have to ron for the door after. Take a Dog Watch to enjoy watching her move.’

’God almighty," Tad breathed heavily, "that would be marvelous. ’

‘Bloody right it is," Alan heartily agreed, getting the itch himself. ’Could you do it?’

‘I promise I shall.’

They went below for more wine, the only thing that seemed to cool the night. Boggs was snoring, and Leonard had retired to his cabin to do some writing. Claghorne came back down through the hatch and poured himself a drink, preparatory to turning in. ’Shit," he said, pawing the air. ’Sir?" Lewrie asked. Was it an order, or a comment? "Bloodsuckers have found us," Claghome said, waving off a mosquito. Lewrie heard a whine and looked down to see one ready to perch on his wrist. He brought his other hand down and smashed it, leaving a tiny smear of blood. ’Well-fed little bastard.’

’I've seen 'em down on the Spanish Main, thicker' n a Channel fog, and each one hungry as a rolled leech," Oaghorne said groggily. "Seen 'em suck a man white.. ‘. ’Aye, Mister Claghorne," Tad said with an angelic expression that almost made Lewrie snort port up his nose as he tried to stifle a laugh. ’Shows how much you know," Claghorne said. "But I'm sleepin' with a net tonight to keep 'em off me. You should, too, if ya had any sense, but I 'spect midshipmen could do with a rash of welts an' all the itehin', so we 'Usee who caulks down quiet an' who tosses all night." So saying, Claghome took his mug of port and went off to his cabin to slam the insubstantial door. ’Seen 'em suck a man white down on the Spanish Main," Tad said in a soft whisper, and a fairly accurate imitation of Claghorne.

Eight bells chimed from the belfry, and the ship's corporal began to make his rounds to make sure that the galley fire was out, and all glims extinguished below decks. The wardroom could keep their pewter lamps burning for another hour, but after more port neither one wanted to stay up and read. Tad Purnell had the deck watch, so he dressed properly and left, and Lewrie turned in, making sure his door was shut tight and that no flying pests lived in his space to disturb his rest.

It was the next morning while the crew were at Divisions that a boat came out to Parrot, bumping against the hull. A mulatto man in livery stood waiting patiently until the men had been inspected and released back to their morning duties, and their pleasures.

After all the wine, and a night on deck, Lewrie felt that his eyes were ready to glaze over and wished he had had more time in his bed box. ’Mister Lewrie," Lieutenant Kenyon called. "Could you join me?" Lewrie crossed to the hatchway to the after cabins, where Kenyon stood with a piece of paper in his hand that had just been handed to him by the mulatto servant. "I have just been given an invitation to a dinner party this evening at the home of… an old acquaintance of rnine, now Sir Richard Slade. He requests that I bring some of my officers as well. Do you think you could be presentable enough to represent Parrot properly?’

‘Aye, sir!" Alan assured him most eagerly. ’Good. Purnell as well. Mister Claghorne might be a bit too rough for that sort of company so I shall leave him in charge. ’

‘I should be delighted, sir.’

’I thought you would be. See to making the gig presentable.

We shall go ashore at the end of the First Dog. This could be quite important. Our passengers will be there, as well as the lieutenant-governor and other luminaries from these parts. I hope that you and Purnell are on your absolute best behavior, mind.’

’We shall endeavor to please, sir," Lewrie said earnestly, but thinking that it would be a splendid opportunity to please himself, and possibly initiate Thaddeus to the pleasures of strumming a bawd.