Edward Marston - Drums of War

'Be warned, Dan. He's changed.'

'It takes a long time to recover from a flogging.'

'I'm not talking about the pain he's in. The change is inside his head. He seems to have gone off into a world of his own. If you want to know the truth,' Welbeck admitted, 'I'm worried about him.'

It was a paradox. In taking punishment on behalf of his friends, Tom Hillier had become their hero. At the very time when they wanted to show their gratitude by spending time with him, he preferred to be on his own. The flogging had isolated him in every sense. He was pleasant to Dobbs and the others but he avoided their company when he could. Being alone was his only solace. It gave him time and space to revalue what he'd suffered. The physical pain was constant. The regimental surgeon had offered him a salve for his wounds but the application of it was so agonising that he only endured it once. Various other remedies were suggested to him. None of them worked and even though the fire on his back gradually burnt less persistently, the inferno inside his head roared on with undiminished rage.

He was strolling beside the stream where he'd met his nemesis when Daniel came upon him. Hillier was astounded to see him.

'Good morning, Captain Rawson,' he said.

'How are you feeling, Tom?'

'It's getting better, sir.'

'I was shocked when your uncle told me what happened.'

'It was my own fault,' said Hillier, too embarrassed to meet his eye, 'and I've no quarrel with that. On this side of the stream, I'm abiding by army regulations. On the other bank — and that's where I was on the night — I was deemed to be absent without leave.' He pursed his lips. 'What a difference five yards of water can make to your life!'

'You went farther afield than five yards, I suspect,' said Daniel.

'I did, Captain.'

'I'm sorry that I wasn't here to help.'

'What could you have possibly done?'

'I could've remonstrated with Major Cracknell. I could've made sure that you were treated fairly from the moment of arrest.'

Hillier was moved. 'Why should you bother about me?'

'It's because you're a rarity, Tom. You're a willing recruit and we get few of them. Well, you've seen the character of the men we have. Some of them only agreed to join the army because it was a way out of prison. According to Sergeant Welbeck, the vast majority of our soldiers begin as rogues, vagabonds or drunkards. You don't fit into any of those categories. You wanted a career in the army.'

'That was a long time ago,' said Hillier, dreamily.

'You took your flogging like a man, I hear.'

'That's no consolation, sir.'

'It is to your uncle. Sergeant Welbeck was impressed.'

'He'd have been more impressed if I'd obeyed regulations.

But I let him down and I let myself down. My parents will be disgusted.'

'There's no reason for them to hear about it.'

'There is, Captain Rawson. My first thought was to keep it from them and I begged Uncle Henry to do likewise. It's just not possible,' said Hillier, quietly. 'I was brought up to tell my parents the truth and my conscience won't allow me to hide this. I can't lie to them.'

'Concealing the truth is not the same as telling a lie.'

'It is to me, sir.'

'In saying nothing of this,' observed Daniel, 'you'd be sparing them untold pain. More to the point, you'd be sparing yourself the ordeal of writing the letter. The army is the army, Tom. It's a hard existence. I'm sure that your parents realise that.'

'They did, Captain. They kept warning me against it.'

Daniel sighed. 'My mother warned me against it. She implored me to stay at home with her. My father died fighting in an army and she feared the same would happen to me.'

'Why didn't you listen to her?'

'For the same reason you didn't pay any attention to your parents,' said Daniel. 'I had an urge inside me. I wanted adventure.'

Hillier made no comment. He seemed to have drifted off into a reverie. There was a faraway look in his eye. It was almost as if Daniel was not even there.

Major Cracknell was playing cards in his tent with Lieutenant Ainley and winning handsomely. He was not pleased to be interrupted by a visitor. The lieutenant, however, seized the opportunity to cut his losses. Seeing that Daniel was intent on speaking to the major, he made an excuse and left. Cracknell tossed his cards on the table.

'You've just cost me a lot of money,' he complained.

'The lieutenant can ill afford to lose it.'

'Since when have you been concerned about Ainley's finances?'

'I don't like to see anyone being exploited, Major.'

Cracknell stood up. 'Are you accusing me of cheating?'

'No, sir, I'm not.'

'Then please refrain from making any further comment on the subject. That, after all,' he said, hands on hips, 'is not what brought you here, is it? You've come to talk about a squealing drummer with a back as red as a lobster.'

'I'm reliably informed that Private Hillier didn't squeal.'

'Perhaps not but he certainly squirmed!

'You obviously took pleasure from that.'

'The pleasure I had was derived from the chance to administer a warning to the others. A good flogging keeps the rest of the men in check for a month. If I'd been lenient with Hillier, it would have encouraged others to emulate him. Dozens of them would have been sneaking off at night to the nearest brothel. I had to make an example of him. Eighty lashes were justified.'

'It was a vindictive punishment.'

'What would you have done, Captain?' asked Cracknell with a sneer. 'Would you have docked his wages or simply given him a slap on the wrist?'

'I'd have taken the circumstances into account. He was a young man, new to the army, obviously cajoled by others into leaving camp without permission. It was his first offence. If he'd been treated firmly but fairly,' argued Daniel, 'he'd have learnt his lesson. But that wasn't enough for you, Major. You wanted blood. You've been persecuting Hillier ever since you discovered that he was Sergeant Welbeck's nephew.'

'I deny that.'

'Your conduct has been malicious and unwarranted.'

'I need no lectures on conduct from you, Captain Rawson,' shouted Cracknell, exploding with anger. 'While you've been cavorting off somewhere, it's been left to me and others to maintain a high standard of discipline in this regiment. It's the duty of officers to keep the lower ranks in order. Unlike you, I don't try to befriend them. It's a sign of weakness and they need a show of strength.'

'What they need is to be able to respect an officer.'

'It's the principle on which I operate.'

'No, Major, you confuse cold fear with respect. They're very different. How can anyone respect you for what you did to Hillier? You took a harmless lad and had him beaten to a pulp to gratify your own desires. Had anyone else been caught that night,' stressed Daniel, 'you wouldn't even have been involved in the punishment.'

'I won't be criticised!' yelled Cracknell.

'You deserve more than criticism.'

'Is that a threat, Captain Rawson?'

'Take it as you wish, sir.'

'You're talking to a superior officer.'

'No, I'm not,' retorted Daniel. 'I'm talking to a cruel, jealous, twisted, malevolent, self-important bastard who's a disgrace to the uniform he wears.'

Losing his temper, Cracknell lashed out wildly with a fist but Daniel dodged the punch with ease and pushed him away. He squared up to the major, hands bunched in readiness. He looked lithe, fit and determined. He was fired by the opportunity to take revenge on behalf of Hillier and to assuage his own hatred of the man. It was a moment for which he'd always yearned. But it never came. Cracknell's anger was replaced by a sulky wariness. Aware of Daniel's reputation as a fighter, he had second thoughts about taking him on. The major was forced to back down, glowering at him but making no move. They stood there for several minutes. The tension was eventually broken by the appearance of a messenger.