Peter Handke - The Ride Across Lake Constance and Other Plays

PORTEN

Put your hands on your head. ( He hesitates .) Did you hear what I said?

GEORGE

( Again first looks at JANNINGS.) I’m still thinking about it.

PORTEN

But the expression exists, doesn’t it?

(GEORGE slowly places his hands on his head .)

VON STROHEIM

( Is playing along .) Put your hands on the table.

GEORGE

( Tests whether the sentence exists .) “Put your hands on the table.” ( Relieved ) Yes. ( He puts his hands on the table .)

PORTEN

Make your hands into fists and caress me!

GEORGE

( Tests the sentence. ) “Make your hands into fists and caress me!?” No!

VON STROHEIM

Hand me the cup.

(GEORGE hands him the cup unthinkingly .)

PORTEN

I’ll show you something ( She smiles at VON STROHEIM as her initiate and starts searching in her clothes. Eventually GEORGE stretches out his hand while she is still looking. Now and then she looks at his hand and continues to search. Suddenly she hits his hand and shoves it away. Maliciously ) That’s what I wanted to show you.

( He writhes and draws in his head. All at once she covers her eyes with both hands and shudders .)

GEORGE

( Startled ) What’s the matter?

PORTEN

( Takes her hands from her eyes .) Oh, it’s nothing. (GEORGE wants to reach for the cup that VON STROHEIM has put down in the meantime, but VON STROHEIM displaces it a little and GEORGE withdraws his hand. They repeat this maneuver several times, both displaying a lot of patience. PORTEN interrupts the game; very hostile to GEORGE) Who are you? (GEORGE gets up quickly and assumes a pose behind the table as if his picture were about to be taken. ) Now I remember. You’re the salesman. You gave me the … ( She puts the riding crop on the table. She makes a slip of the tongue .) How much is it?

GEORGE

Riding crop.

PORTEN

Yes, that’s want I wanted to ask too. You sold me the riding crop.

(GEORGE sits down, PORTEN again puts her hands over her eyes and shudders. She pushes the riding crop away .)

JANNINGS

Don’t you like it any more?

PORTEN

No, I only pushed it away.

JANNINGS

( In a disguised voice ) The riding crop on the table, that means: someone who’s very close to you will be swallowed up by a swamp and you will stand there slowly clapping your hands above your head. ( He laughs in a strange voice . PORTEN gets up quickly, pushing the guitar off the table in the process. JANNINGS in a disguised voice ) A guitar falls off the table, that means: hats staggering into glacial fissures during the next mountain-climbing expedition. ( He laughs in a strange voice. )

VON STROHEIM

(To PORTEN, who is standing motionless ) You want to leave?

PORTEN

( Sits down .) No, I stood up just now. ( She suddenly crosses her arms over her breast and hunches her shoulders .)

GEORGE

Are you cold?

PORTEN

( Drops her arms .) No. ( To VON STROHEIM) And who are you? (VON STROHEIM picks up the guitar and holds it as he did previously. PORTEN tenderly ) Oh, it’s you! ( She becomes serious again immediately .)

VON STROHEIM

Did you remember something?

( Helplessly, she tries to give him another affectionate look, stops, reaches for a cigar .)

GEORGE

Are you restless?

PORTEN

( Puts the cigar back in the box. Serene ) No, I only wanted to take a cigar. ( Suddenly she screams ) I only wanted to take a cigar! (GEORGE shies back, pulls his jacket over the head, as if he were protecting himself against rain, and stays hunched up like that. PORTEN screams ) I only wanted to take a cigar! I ONLY WANTED TO TAKE A CIGAR!

( They all hunch up more and more. Now one hears a noise emanating from backstage, a high-pitched, pathetic howling.

The howling coincides with a slight darkening onstage. PORTEN immediately stops and hunches up too.

The WOMAN WITH THE SCARF steps swiftly out of the wings and walks to the second tapestry door without looking at anyone. As soon as she opens the door, there is quiet behind it. Instead, one hears the rustling of a newspaper, which is lying just inside the door. The WOMAN goes inside and returns with a big DOLL that represents a CHILD. The CHILD is quiet now, it has the hiccups. It is wearing a gold-embroidered white nightgown and looks very true to life. The mouth is enormous and open. As the WOMAN reaches center stage with the CHILD, it starts to bawl terribly, somehow without any preliminaries. GEORGE, jacket over his head, quickly leaps toward the chest and closes the drawer. The bawling stops at once.

The WOMAN carries the CHILD now from one to the other very fast, and in passing, during brief stops, it reaches for the women’s breasts and between the men’s legs. Very rapidly it also wipes off all the things that had been lying on the table, then pulls away the lace tablecloth and drops it. When the WOMAN stands with the CHILD beside BERGNER, who seems to be still asleep, it begins to bawl again, and as suddenly as if it had never stopped. The WOMAN holds it in such a way that the CHILD sees BERGNER from the front. It stops bawling at once and is carried away .

The WOMAN returns alone, closes the tapestry door, and goes off. After she has gone, they all sit there motionless. One of them tries to reach for something, but stops as soon as he starts. Someone else tries a gesture that atrophies instantly. A third wants to reply with a gesture, interrupts it twitching. They squat there, start to do something simultaneously; one of them futilely tries to pull his hand out of a pocket; one or two of them even open their mouths — a few sounds, then all of them grow stiff again and cuddle up, make themselves very small as if freezing to death.

Only BERGNER sits there the whole time motionless, with eyes closed. All of a sudden, as though she were playing “waking up,” she moves slightly. By and by, the others look toward her . VON STROHEIM gets up and bends down to her. She again moves a little. The others are motionless. She opens her eyes and recognizes VON STROHEIM; she begins to smile .)

The stage becomes dark.

Translated by Michael Roloff

Characters

HERMANN QUITT

HANS, his confidant

FRANZ KILB, minority stockholder

QUITT’S WIFE

A large room. The afternoon sun is shining in from one side. The distant silhouette of a city, as though it were seen through a huge window, is visible in the background. (The background might also be formed by a backdrop, similar to a movie screen, with the silhouette of the city vaguely outlined against it.)

QUITT , wearing a sweat suit, is working out on a punching bag, belaboring it with his fists, feet, and knees. HANS , his confidant, wearing tails, stands next to him with a tray and a bottle of mineral water, watching. QUITT takes a sip from the bottle, pours some on his head, and sits down on a stool.