Various - The Fifteen Comforts of Matrimony - Responses From Women

We'll have you know, of Whores are very few,
That will to any Man be ever true;
To us all Men for Money are alike,
With Skips as soon as Beaus we bargains strike;
And gad no sooner is a Cully gone,
But quick another in his Room gets on.

Besides great Charges we are at for Cloaths,
To tempt the Fancies of our cringing Beaus,
We Pimps and Bullies keep to be our Bail,
When Sharping Bailiffs nabb us for a Jayl.

Again as we to Bridewel oft are sent,
To undergo a flauging Punishment,
A bribe to him that Whips us then is gi'n,
To have Compassion to our tender Skin.

With pretty winning ways we do assure,
Our selves to bring the Woodcocks to our Lure
As ogling wishfully, and having Tongue,
Which tho' 'tis false, yet with good Language hung
And if we have a Voice that's good, we sing
And Syren like our Fops to ruin bring;
Then how we Strumpets do rejoyce to see,
The wiser Sex undone by Lechery.

But now good lack-a-day our Trade's so bad,
That truly Customers can scarce be had,
Through those sly Whore's that do in privat dwell,
So (but a story sad it is to tell)
Our common Whores can scarce their Livings get
By all the means of an intrieguing Wit.
For Drury Lane , in Fleetstreet or the Strand ,
Hours we walk e're any by the Hand,
Will take us, wherefore as we daggle home,
Some prick-louse Taylor strutting up will come,
With whom for want we're forced to comply,
for one poor two pence wet, and two pence dry.