Blake Pierce - Before He Covets

“None,” Mackenzie said.

“Oh,” Colby said, a little embarrassed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know – ”

“No need to apologize,” Mackenzie said. It was now her turn to look blankly out the window when she added: “I sort of like it this way.”

Mackenzie was underwhelmed by graduation. It was really nothing more than a formalized version of her high school graduation and not quite as classy and formal as her college graduation. As she waited for her name to be called, she had plenty of time to reflect back on those graduations and how her family had seemed to fade further and further into the background with each one.

She could recall nearly crying while walking to the stage at her high school graduation, saddened by the fact that her father would never see her grow up. She’d known it through her teen years but it was a fact that struck her like a rock between the eyes as she had walked up to the stage to receive her diploma. It was not something that had stirred her as much in college. When she had walked the stage during her college graduation, she had done so with no family in the crowd. It was, she realized during the academy ceremony, the pivotal moment in her life when she decided once and for all that she preferred to be alone in most things in life. If her family had no interest in her, then she had no interest in them.

The ceremony ended without much fanfare and when it was over, she spotted Colby taking pictures with her mother and father on the other side of the large lobby that the graduates and their guests all filed out into afterward. From what Mackenzie could tell, Colby was doing an excellent job of hiding her displeasure from her parents. All the while, her parents beamed proudly.

Feeling awkward and with nothing to do, Mackenzie started to wonder just how quickly she could get out of the assembly, get home and out of her graduation garb, and open the first of what would likely be several beers for the afternoon. As she started heading for the doors, she heard a familiar voice from behind her, calling her name.

“Hey, Mackenzie,” the male voice said. She knew who it was at once – not just because of the voice itself, but because there were few people who called her Mackenzie in this environment rather than just White.

It was Ellington. He was dressed in a suit and looked just about as uncomfortable as Mackenzie felt. Still, the smile he gave her was a little too comfortable. Yet in that moment, she didn’t really mind.

“Hi, Agent Ellington.”

“I think in a situation like this, it’s okay to call me Jared.”

“I prefer Ellington,” she said with a brief smile of her own.

“How do you feel?” he asked.

She shrugged, realizing just how badly she wanted to get out of there. She could tell herself all the lies she wanted, but the fact that she had no family, friends, or loved ones in attendance was starting to weigh on her.

“Just a shrug?” Ellington asked.

“Well, how should I feel?”

“Accomplished. Proud. Excited. Just to name a few.”

“I’m all of those things,” she said. “It’s just…I don’t know. The whole ceremony aspect of it seems a little much.”

“I can understand that,” Ellington said. “God, I hate wearing a suit.”

Mackenzie was about to come back with a comment – maybe about how he actually wore the suit well – when she saw McGrath approaching from behind Ellington. He also smiled at her but, unlike Ellington’s, his seemed nearly forced. He extended his hand to her and she took it, surprised at how limp his grip was.

“I’m glad you made it through,” McGrath said. “I know you have a bright and promising career ahead of you.”

“No pressure or anything, right?” Ellington said.

“The top five percent,” McGrath said, not allowing Mackenzie a chance to say a single word. “Damn fine work, White.”

“Thank you, sir,” was all she could find to say.

McGrath leaned in close, all business now. “I’d like for you to come to my office Monday morning at eight o’clock. I wanted to get you deep inside the inner workings as soon as possible. I already have your paperwork drafted up – I actually took care of that a long time ago, so it would all be ready when this day came. That’s how much faith I have in you. So…let’s not wait. Monday at eight. Sound good?”

“Of course,” she said, surprised at this uncharacteristic display of glowing support.

He smiled, shook her hand again, and quickly disappeared into the crowd.

When McGrath was gone, Ellington gave her a perplexed look and a wide grin.

“So, he’s in good spirits. And I can tell you that doesn’t happen very often.”

“Well, it’s a big day for him, I guess,” Mackenzie said. “A whole new talent pool for him to pick and choose from.”

“That’s true,” Ellington said. “But all jokes aside, the man is really smart with how he utilizes new agents. Keep that in mind when you meet with him on Monday.”

An awkward silence passed between them; it was a silence that they had gotten used to and that had become a staple of their friendship – or whatever it was that was going on between them.

“Well, look,” Ellington said. “I just wanted to say congrats. And I wanted to let you know that you’re always welcome to call me if things get too real. I know that sounds dumb but at some point – even for the infamous Mackenzie White – you’re going to need someone to vent to. It can catch up to you pretty quickly.”

“Thanks,” she said.

Then, suddenly, she wanted to ask him to come with her – not in any sort of romantic way, but just to have a familiar face with her. She knew him relatively well and even though she had conflicted feelings about him, she wanted him by her side. She hated to admit it, but she was starting to feel that she should do something to celebrate this day and this moment in her life. Even if it was just spending a few awkward hours with Ellington, it would be better (and likely more productive) than sitting around feeling sorry for herself and drinking alone.

But she said nothing. And even if she could have mustered the courage, it would not have mattered; Ellington quickly gave her a little nod and then, like McGrath, slipped back into the crowd.

Mackenzie stood there for a moment, doing her best to shrug off the increasing feeling of being utterly alone.

When Mackenzie showed up to her first day of work on Monday, she could not shake Ellington’s words, running through her head like a mantra: The man is really smart with how he utilizes new agents. Keep that in mind when you meet with him on Monday.

She tried to use that to ground herself because if she was being truthful, she was nervous. It didn’t help that her morning began when she was met by one of McGrath’s men, Walter Hasbrook, now her department supervisor, and he escorted her like a child to the elevators. Walter looked to be pushing sixty and was roughly thirty pounds overweight. He had no personality and while Mackenzie held nothing against him, she didn’t like the way he explained everything to her as if she were stupid.

This did not change as he led her to the third floor, where a maze of cubicles spread out like a zoo. Agents were posted at each cubicle, some talking on the phone while others typed into their computers.

“And this is you,” Hasbrook said, gesturing to a cubicle in the center of one of the outer rows. “This is the central for Research and Surveillance. You’ll find a few e-mails waiting for you, giving you access to the servers and a bureau-wide contact list.”

She stepped into her cubicle, feeling a little disenchanted but still nervous. No, this was not the exciting case she’d hoped to start her career on but it was still the first step on a journey toward everything she’d been working for ever since she’d gotten out of high school. She pulled her rolling chair out and plopped down in her seat.