Maxim Mazhorin - The struggle between good and evil

It is very difficult when some people bear children with disabilities. Children are born without hands, feet, or with other diseases. It’s hard when these children ask why they are not like the rest of the people. But even harder, when someone makes his children disabled himself, because of his psychosis, anger or irritation. Such parents often say to their children: “Forgive me! Forgive me! Forgive me!” But the child often responds to his mother or father: “Why are you repeating the same words to me? And why do you cry? Why are you asking for forgiveness? You should forgive me for having broken a vase, a scratched door or thrown potatoes, we will not do it again!”

Madness, anger, narrow thinking, irritation, hatred, pride, jealousy, quarrels, psychoses and much more insanity destroy a person from within, dump a person off the rails of love and make the worst and most terrible things with a person.

I remember that I watched once some kind of program about people’s lives. One woman who sat in the studio said: “We all do not have enough love!” I’m sure that many people sitting in that studio, as well as many viewers, did not understand what this adult woman was talking about. And some people, probably, said thought: “If it’s not enough for us, let it not be enough! A man cannot give what he hasn’t got!” But I think there were some people who said:" Maybe we should learn to love!” But if we have not got the most important in our lives, then for what and with what such a person lives? If people do not have enough water in the desert, how can they survive? A person will simply die without water. But a person who does not have love in him continues to live, but there is something else inside him instead of love. Without love a person is physically alive, but spiritually he is simply dead.

Once I asked Artem: “Does our father give us love or not, what do you think?” Artem replied: “I do not remember a single day that our father will give me loves. He only offends and proudly ridicules me and constantly gets irritated. I’m sure when people love their children they do not do that.” Yes! In fact, it is true. Absolutely everything irritated our father. When Artem and I opened our mouths to talk with our father, our words were like salt, which is poured on the wounds of a man, causing him inconvenience, discontent and irritation.

Love never dies. It can only be temporarily encroached on, exposing it as ridiculous, stupid, abnormal, shameful and finally try to press the love with the foot to the ground.

Our father constantly makes some conditions for love, and also our father is distracted from love by some things. Our father wants something good, but he has some kind of constant anger from within. Very often he discreetly thinks: “I’m a good person! I like to be closer to my children, especially to my son! But something is hindering inside. My son is annoying and angry with me. Each of his questions leads me to unbearable irritation and I cannot stand it. Maybe, I should let my son stop asking me his stupid questions and let him achieve some success in this life. Perhaps only then it will all pass! Yes! And when I retire and I calm down a bit and everything will be fine!!!”

I remember the day when Artem came home after one youth camp and our father went out to meet him. He did not look into the eyes of his son again, but looked somewhere outside and on the floor, as if embarrassed by his son and could not talk to him about anything, considering Artem as futile person and not adult yet. But the reason was not in Artem, as three days later Artem began to receive regular portions of humiliation, screaming, angry and scowls towards Artem.

I remember how one of our distant relatives, who had become very rich, came to visit our father. He helped us once in a difficult moment, giving us financial assistance. When our father met that man and drank some strong drinks, his eyes were shining with happiness. Our dad told him the sweetest, laudatory words of love and good. He said to him: “My friend! You are not just a friend to me, you are more than a friend to me. I am very glad to meet you warmly and tell you that I have always valued our friendship. You can address me with absolutely any request. I will give you any help with great joy.”

I am sure that if our father accidentally found out that Artem became a millionaire, then Artem would not have to listen to no offensive words during the day. I imagine the picture: Ten o’clock in the morning, the father is going to get angry, get irritated with Artem because he helps to do something to his father, but it is not right. But suddenly a bell rings and Artem gets to know that he inherited in a will from some distant relative or won a stunning amount in the lottery, and only Artem has the right to dispose of this fortune. I think that our father would have never say anything offensive to Artem for all day, thinking about the fact that he will get a certain amount of money. Embarrassed by the apology and looking somewhere outside, he would begin to pretend to smile and pretend that there were no offenses on his part. But even if they were, then his smile and closed mouth would apologize for his behavior, hiding the words: “You can’t even hold screws normally! And where do you get it from?!”

I have a friend whose parents behaved exactly the same. This guy has not been able to find a job for a long time. His parents did not like that, and they began to offend him and tell him that he simply did not want to work. They

engaged in ad hominem attacks with him and called him “a stupid child”. Not existing love and respect for him disappeared in their eyes immediately. Of course, when this guy achieved a success and began to earn much more than his parents, the parents’ eyes shone again. And they began to treat their son much better. Once the parents of this guy burned down the house, which they have been built for almost fifteen years. Fortunately, everyone was safe and sound. Their son just went to the bank, withdrew a certain amount from his account, gave it to his parents and said: “Build a new house or buy another one.” His mother shed a tear of joy and said: “We are proud of you, son. You’re clever.” Mom could not even imagine that these words would upset her own son, because he felt inside of himself why and for what they treated him so. He remembered his childhood, youth, a time when he could not find a job! He remembered the time when his mother and father did not believe in him, remembered all the words that they had told him before, looked down and did not say anything. His sadness and grief blinded his eyes with tears. His mother, seeing his wet eyes, decided that it was a tear of joy. But he was thinking about something else. He understood that his mother was spiritually dead, and did not have humility and love inside. I think if this guy would ask his mother: “Why do you start treating me better when I got money?” Then, surely, his mother would answer him: “What?! We treat you as we always did before, because you are our only beloved son!” It will be hard to believe in these words, because the facts speak quite differently. Sometimes, his mother would say: “Go away and do not come until you find a job.” What did this young man feel? It is not known how long this humiliation could last, if the guy did not find a job and did not get rich. But this is only one of a thousand stories like that. And how many cases there are where fathers completely turn away from their children, just because they did not follow in their footsteps, only for the fact that their son chose a different profession. He chose the profession that his father did not want. His father probably wanted his son to become a general or maybe someone else, for example, a policeman, a doctor, a lawyer. But the son did not become what his father wanted to. Of course, the father was upset, because all the children of his friends became generals. Is it really necessary to stop loving and respecting your children because of this?