Aldivan Teixeira Torres - I Am

Dedication Dedication I dedicate this work to all the enlightened and fighting spirits, that have had the courage to face the social dictates and spread their beliefs and views of the world. In special, to those stigmatized by society who are constantly being pre-judged. For these I have a message: “I am” believes in you.

Acknowledgements

Introduction

Psychography

Arcoverde

Ipojuca—Arcoverde

Riacho do meio— Arcoverde

Caraíbas—Arcoverde

Mimoso—Pesqueira

Pesqueira

Belo Jardim

In the ghetto

The return to the observatory

São Caetano

The museum

Restart

On the way

At the rural area

Bezerros

The Papangus

The crossroads district

The return

Gravatá

Towards Pombos

Vitoria de Santo Antão

Moreno

Finally, Recife, the capital of Pernambuco

Chapter I

Chapter II

Chapter III

Chapter IV

Chapter V

Chapter VI

Chapter VII

Chapter VIII

Chapter IX

Chapter X

Chapter XI

Chapter XII

Chapter XIII

Chapter XIV

Chapter XV

Chapter XVI

Chapter XVII

Chapter XVIII

Chapter XX

Chapter XXI

Chapter XXII

Chapter XXIII

Chapter XXIV

Chapter XXV

Chapter XXVI

Chapter XXVII

Chapter XXVIII

Chapter XXIX

Chapter XXX

Final Part

It was the day of 01/01/2015, agitated, dark, sombre, stormy morning, despite being the start of the new year, at a certain place in the outback of Pernambuco, where resting on a recently bought box-bed, was the glamorous seer, the old dreamer who had conquered the cave of despair and its fire.

Among conflicting nightmares that wake him several times during the night, he debates tirelessly in search of signs that would allow a greater realization of his deepest dreams. However, nothing seemed to promise anything.

At exactly 3H00 in the morning awakes from the last sleep of the night, gets out of the bed approaches his desk where are his notebook, his printer, books, the cable to connect the internet, forms and other bureaucratic papers.

He sits down on the chair, opens the drawer, taking out a pen and paper. The spirit of Yahweh agitates him and then he begins to psychograph.

“A new era approaches and in these new times, I want to give you, my son, all the honour, glory and success deserved. I act in this way, because you are the only one on earth to understand me, to listen to me and to be completely obedient. Therefore, I tell you: Take your bag, your crook, your cross and follow me. Do not worry with what you are leaving behind and not with what will happen after, for everything has been planned from the beginning of time. I want through you to touch the people’s heart, make them reflect and who knows take a new direction in their troubled lives. I am, once more, intends looking for the sinners, for as the old saying goes: Who needs a doctor, is who is sick. Those we believe, I promise eternal life and a special place in our kingdom. Those who reject it, they will have their names taken out of the book of life, for those who do not recognize the son they can see, much less will recognize the father who they don’t see. The latter does not deserve the dust from your feet. Don’t be afraid, will always be with you directing you internally. There are no secrets between us and my grace will keep you. Look for a signal.”

The seer stops writing. He picks up the paper and gets worried. What was going to happen? At every moment that passes, the gigantic wheel into which his life has been transformed, becomes more interesting.

He has already reunited the opposing forces, understood deeply his dark night of the soul, revisited the past, has deciphered God’s code and now he was before more demands.

Tiredness was intense, and he decides to go back to sleep. He was sure that he would not be able to sleep, but at least he could rest his tired body. And so, he does: keeps the paper in the desk drawer, gets up from the chair and with four steps slumps on the bed. Now, it was just wait for day break to take care of the necessary measures.

Until this happens, he takes advantage for an inner reflection about himself, his mission and respective challenges, his social circles and its needs, his commitments, the daily battle and try to foresee the destiny’s nuances, each time more amazing. But the most important is that everything remained in peace and at the expected rhythm. His star would soon shine.

And so, the time passes. When the alarm clock rings exactly at 5H00 he jumps out of bed, gets dressed, shouts of happiness for it is a holiday, goes to the shelf, picks up the cable of the radio and plugs it in. In the same shelf he chooses one of his favourite CDs and plays it. He listens to three songs, undresses, picks up shampoo, soap, brush, tooth paste and shaving cream, razor, the towel wrapped round his needy, thin and sweating body. Leaving the room, he goes through two lounges and at the end of the corridor enters the bathroom. Closing the door behind him, removes the towel, put the personal items on the basin and starts the required procedures.

Carefully splashes some water on his face and applies the cream. At this point, he has the chance of analysing his external aspect. His face was black and blue resulting from constantly hitting his face on the pillow during the previous night. Being vain, immediately starts shaving so to feel young as soon as possible. As he shaves, the whiskers are cut, the skin becomes soft, despite some lacerations caused by not paying attention. Just as well they were not serious.

When he finishes, gets under the shower, opens it, and the contact with the cold water awakes his most inner feelings. Everything was falling into place in his life, leaving each time his destination even more interesting. Although he had not realized it yet, he felt fully confident and capable of winning once again. He was prepared to go to the bottom in search of the signal mentioned by his father in the psychograph message a while ago. Even if he did not have an idea where to start.The seer closes the shower. He puts soap on his body in the smallest detail and wash it once more. With the exfoliating of the skin, now it is easier to remove completely the corporal, spiritual and psychologic impurities that had now and again afflicted him. He takes advantage and concentrates in cleaning, leaving other thoughts for another time.

Between shampoo and soap and more cold water, he finishes bathing in fifteen minutes. He returns to the basin, brushes his white teeth, making them shine. Now, he is ready for a free day and who knows, interesting in his almost monotonous life. Feeling confident, picks up the towel, dries himself, gets dressed and leaves the bathroom, and using the same way as before, returns to his room. At this point, everyone in the house was awake and politely wishes good morning to the ones he meets and is promptly reciprocated despite that not being the usual. In the room, he puts on simple but clean clothes. Then heads to the kitchen located at the end of the passage. Passing through the same places as before, arrives there, goes to the table and sits on an empty chair around the table. At this point he smells the coffee and fried eggs which are being prepared by his kind sister. The others start to arrive making the place livelier, with the usual family contradictions.

The breakfast is then served and comprises of bread and eggs, bread rolls and biscuits. While they eat, they engage in a conversation relating to daily matters, regional news, sports, politics, religion and relationships, each one having the opportunity of giving his opinion. Everything is very pleasant.