Susan Hornick - More Than a Cowboy

“Going somewhere?” he asked.

She searched frantically for Hap, then saw Sarah wave to her friends and skip toward her.

Jared watched the child approach. Her movements smacked with familiarity, rekindling old memories of another time and place, memories of a young boy with unruly jet-black hair tagging along behind him with the same bounce in his step and tilt to his head. The puzzle pieces were starting to come together. The first shock wave knocked him like a mule’s kick.

Every movement right down to her furrowed brow bore traces of the brother he’d lost. Her black hair refused to be tamed by braids and streamed in a tangled mass around her face. She lifted her chin and darted a look at him. Another shock wave ripped through Jared, pain so intense it stole his breath.

“Hi. I’m Sarah,” she said holding his gaze with gray-green eyes.

Jared opened his mouth but nothing came out. This child was a feminine replica of Mitch. She had to be Mitch’s daughter. Obviously Haley hadn’t expected to see Mitch again. That was the reason he’d seen recognition and shock on the replay tapes, the reason her answers were less than satisfactory. Sarah was the secret Haley was hiding, the secret that may have cost Mitch his life.

The color drained from Haley’s face. Like a bear protecting her young, she moved between him and Sarah. “Sarah Rose. Go to the barn and find Hap,” she said.

“But, Mom—”

“Go. Now.”

Sarah bounced an uncertain look between them and raced toward the barn. Jared watched until she was out of sight. He wanted to reach out and touch her, make sure she was real. She was so like Mitch it made him ache. Haley had kept Sarah from Mitch, from Walt, from all of them. Why? Anger waged a tug of war inside him.

“She’s Mitch’s daughter, isn’t she, Haley? Did he know?” The question nearly choked him. “What really happened in the arena the night Mitch died?”

He heard the steel in his own voice. She winced, then grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the truck, away from the barns and from Sarah. “She’s my daughter. Go away. You have no right to hound me.”

“Mitch’s death gives me that right,” he said looking toward the barn. Jared shook with rage. Only God would be able to help her if he was right. “Look me in the eye and tell me that child isn’t his and that you didn’t deliberately keep her from him. From her grandparents.”

She couldn’t. She knew it and so did he. “Sarah has a right to know her family,” he said. “We just lost Mitch, and Sarah is a living part of him. We have a right to know her.” His chest tightened. He fisted his hands against his sides.

Haley flattened herself against the truck. “You have no rights and neither did Mitch. He lost that the second he left me behind that—”

She covered her mouth with her hand. She wouldn’t—couldn’t—think about that night or speak of it ever. Not with this man or any other. The fury in Jared’s eyes terrified her. The realization of what he wanted, expected, was unthinkable.

She looked toward the barn and saw Sarah pulling Hap toward them, his bum leg sliding in the dirt, kicking dust into the evening air. “I can’t talk to you about this now.”

He followed her gaze. His eyes narrowed when they rested on Sarah, then softened. For a moment she thought he would refuse, that he would lie in wait, snatch Sarah away and disappear. A hand clenched around her soul.

“When?” he said.

“Tomorrow. I’ll meet you at the bull pens in the morning.”

His gaze shifted back to her and hardened. “Be there, Haley. If you run, I’ll find you.”

He spun around without looking back and disappeared into the crowd, his threat hanging in the air like heavy fog. Haley’s whole body shook. She gripped the truck and gulped in a breath, felt Hap and Sarah’s presence behind her, then Hap’s hand touched her shoulder and Sarah’s small fingers closed around hers.

“Mom? Are you okay? Who was that man?”

The endless night finally broke, sending a streak of red across the horizon. Haley headed toward the bull pens taking comfort in the familiar surroundings. Meeting Jared felt safer with Hap and Sarah out of Wyoming and back in Colorado, even if she hadn’t answered Sarah’s questions to satisfaction. One more strike against Jared Sinclair.

The sounds and smells around the stock pens rose in the morning air. Haley slowed her step, then stopped. Jared stood in front of Resurrection’s pen, his profile outlined beneath a wide-brimmed hat. His arms were draped over the top rail, his eyes locked on the bull. She wondered if he, too, had been avoiding Resurrection’s pen. Even from a distance, she saw his chin tighten, then his hand brushed over his face.

Her heart squeezed. He was an enemy, a threat to herself and Sarah. She couldn’t see him as a man grieving a loss, but she couldn’t ignore it either.

“I’m here,” she said.

Jared lifted his head, turned and faced her. Shadows lingered beneath his eyes. He hadn’t shaved and the stubble darkening his face made him forbidding. She took a backward step.

“I should have been here,” Jared said.

His pain mingled with her own. Haley ignored the warning buzzing in her head. “It wouldn’t have mattered,” she said. “There are no rules with Resurrection. You couldn’t have stopped what happened.” She hesitated a moment, then added, “Neither could I.”

“We’ll never know for certain,” he said pulling his jacket collar up. “But that’s not why we’re here, is it? You see, Haley, it’s not the beginning or the end that matters most now. It’s the space in between.”

The space that included Sarah. The beginning did matter, to her, but he loved his brother. Sympathy vanished in a rush of white-hot anger. “Don’t presume you know me or anything about me.”

His gaze traveled her face, then locked on her eyes. Haley wished she could crawl inside his head and know what he was thinking. This guessing was like falling off a cliff in slow motion.

“That’s the whole point. None of us really know anything, do we? I’ll make this clear and direct. Sarah has a grandfather who feels he’s lost everything. The truth is, he hasn’t.” Tense silence stretched between them. “Mitch isn’t here to speak for himself, so I’ll do it for him. He deserves justice for what you kept from him. I want you and Sarah to come to South Dakota to meet…”

Haley gasped, certain Resurrection had gut kicked her, but the animal stood quietly, his nose buried in a mound of alfalfa. Her legs threatened to buckle. She shook her head.

Jared lifted a brow. “Is that a no?” he said in a harsh, raw voice.

She looked up, forcing herself to meet his gaze without flinching. “That’s a never.”

“Mitch made bad choices for a lot of years,” Jared said. “In the last few months, he’d turned his life around. He was pulling things together. Trying to right the wrongs.”

“And for that he deserves…what?”

His eyes flashed. Haley moved to the corral and stared at Resurrection. Jared moved beside her. “After I left you last night, I thought a lot about everything that’s happened. Mitch walked away from you and Sarah. Away from his responsibilities. I get that. I think I understand some things that I didn’t before.”

Haley’s hand fisted. “You understand nothing!” She raised her fist to strike him. He caught her hand, his grip around her wrist powerful and painful. She trembled but stared him down.

If he wanted the truth, she could stomp him into the dust with it. But she couldn’t revisit a place that had taken her years to get past. His grip tightened. She struggled, kicking at his legs.