Lucy Gordon: His Pretend Wife

But when she looked up he’d gone.

She found him in the kitchen half an hour later, eating bread and cheese and drinking a cup of tea. She’d switched tactics now. Charm would be better.

‘What are you hiding out here for?’ she asked, smiling. ‘It’s a party. You should be having fun.’

‘I’m sorry, what did you say?’ He raised his head from the book he’d been reading. His eyes were unfocused, as though part of him was still buried in the pages, and he didn’t seem to have noticed her smile.

‘It’s a party. Come and have fun. Don’t be boring out here.’

‘Better than being boring in there,’ he said, indicating the noise with his head.

‘Who says you’re boring?’

He shrugged. ‘I would be to them.’ His tone suggested that he wasn’t breaking his heart over this.

‘So live a little.’

‘By “live” you mean drink too much and make a fool of myself? No, thanks. I did that in my first year at Uni, and who needs to repeat an experience?’

He was dividing his attention between Ellie and his book, making no secret of the fact that she couldn’t go fast enough for him.

‘You mean we’re boring, don’t you?’ she demanded, nettled.

He shrugged. ‘If the cap fits.’ Then he looked up from the book, giving her his whole attention. ‘I’m sorry, that was rude of me.’

‘Yes, it was,’ noticing that his smile was gentle and charming.

‘What’s the party about?’

‘It’s my birthday-and Grace’s.’

‘How old are you?’

‘Nineteen.’ He laid down the book and regarded her, his head on one side. ‘All right, not quite nineteen,’ she admitted.

He looked her up and down in a way that made her think he was getting the point at last, but when he spoke it was only to say, ‘Not quite eighteen, either.’

‘I’m seventeen today,’ she admitted.

‘Don’t sound so disappointed. Seventeen is a lot of fun.’

‘How would you know? I’ll bet you were never seventeen.’

He laughed at that. ‘I was, but it’s lost in the mists of time.’

When he grinned he was very attractive, she decided. ‘Yes, I can see you’re very old. You must be at least twenty-one.’

‘Twenty-six, actually. Ancient.’

‘No way. I like older men.’ She was perching on the edge of the table now, crossing her legs so that their silky perfection was on display.

‘Really?’ he said, meeting her eyes.

‘Really,’ she said in a husky voice, full of meaning.

He picked up the book. ‘Go back to your party, little girl. And be careful what you drink.’

‘I think that’s up to me,’ she said defiantly.

‘Sure. Enjoy the hangover.’

She glared but he wasn’t looking. There was nothing to do but flounce out of the kitchen, slamming the door behind her. So she did it.

She found Johnny drinking cider.

‘Your brother’s insufferable,’ she snapped.

‘I could have told you that. Dull as ditch water. I don’t know what made him arrive home tonight of all nights. He’s supposed to be studying for his exams.’

‘I thought he was already a doctor.’

‘He is. He qualified last summer. This is a different lot of exams. He’s always studying for something. Forget him and enjoy yourself. Here.’ He poured some cider into a glass for her and she drank it in one gulp. Johnny immediately refilled her glass and she drained it again.

Out of sight she clutched the edge of the table. Not for the world would she have done anything so uncool as reveal how it was affecting her. She took a deep breath against the swimming of her head, and held out her glass.

‘Fill it up,’ she commanded with bravado.

He did so, and from somewhere there was an admiring cheer. Encouraged, she seized the big plastic bottle and drained it.

When she took the floor again she found that something had happened to her. Her limbs were mysteriously light, she danced as if floating on air and her whole body seemed infused with sensuality. Partners came and went. She didn’t know who she was dancing with from one moment to the next, but she knew that none of them was the one she wanted.

‘Hey,’ she said, suddenly aware that there was a pair of unfamiliar arms about her, and she was being urged towards the door. ‘Who are you?’

‘You know me,’ somebody whispered against her mouth. It was a man, but she couldn’t think who he was. ‘And you fancy me, don’t you?’

‘Do I?’

‘’Course you do. You’re up for it, I can tell. Hey, what do you think you’re doing?’ The last words were addressed to someone who’d appeared out of nowhere and was determinedly freeing Ellie from the man’s arms. ‘Clear off.’

‘No, you clear off,’ came Andrew’s voice.

‘Now, look here-’

‘Get lost before I do something very painful to you,’ Andrew said, speaking almost casually.

‘He will too,’ Ellie remarked to nobody in particular. ‘He’s a doctor, so he’d know how.’ The whole thing suddenly seemed terribly funny and she collapsed in giggles. Strong arms held her up, but now they were Andrew’s arms.

‘Thank you, kind sir,’ she said with dignity, ‘for coming to my rescue like a knight in shining armour.’

‘What the devil have you been drinking?’ Andrew demanded, not sounding at all like a gallant knight.

‘Dunno,’ she replied truthfully. ‘It’s a party.’

‘So because it’s a party you have to pour filthy rubbish down your throat and make a fool of yourself?’ he said scathingly.

‘Who are you calling a fool?’

‘You, because you act like one.’

‘Push off,’ she said belligerently. The scene wasn’t going at all as it should. ‘I can take care of myself.’

‘Oh, yeah!’ he said, not even trying to be polite. ‘I’ve seen children who can take better care of themselves than you. Come on.’

He’d taken a firm hold of her, but not in the way that other young men tried to. More like a man clearing out the rubbish. Ellie found herself being propelled firmly to the door.

‘What d’you think you’re doing?’ she demanded.

‘Taking you home.’

‘I don’t want to go home.’ She tried to struggle but he had his hand firmly around her waist. ‘Let go !’

‘Don’t waste your energy,’ he advised her kindly. ‘I’m a lot stronger than you.’

‘Help!’ she yelled. ‘Abduction! Kidnap! Help!’

That made them sit up, she was glad to see. Heads turned. Pete appeared, blocking their path.

‘Where are you taking my girl?’ he said belligerently.

‘Who said I was your girl?’ she demanded, briefly diverted. ‘I never-’

‘Shut up, the pair of you,’ Andrew said without heat. ‘She’s not your girl because you don’t know how to look after her. And you-’ he tightened his grip on Ellie as she tried to make a bolt for it ‘-you aren’t old enough to be anybody’s girl. You’re just a daft little kid who puts on fancy clothes and her mother’s make-up and thinks she’s grown up. Now, let’s get out of here.’

‘I don’t want to get out of here.’

‘Did I ask what you wanted?’ he enquired indifferently.

‘You’ll be sorry you did this.’

‘Not half as sorry as you’ll be if I don’t.’

She redoubled her efforts to escape, but he simply lifted her off the floor and left her kicking helplessly as he pushed Pete aside and strode on. Her head was swimming from the cider and her limbs were growing heavy, but through the gathering mist of tipsiness she could see her friends sniggering at her plight.

But then-relief! Johnny appeared, also trying to block their path.

‘Put her down,’ he said. ‘She’s my girl.’