Jill Shalvis - Roughing It With Ryan

More rustling, then a harried, “Yes! Come in!”

Stepping inside, he took in the place with one sweeping glance and smiled. Nope, still no furniture, but the living room and its floor-to-ceiling windows sparkled clean and smelled like lemons. On the clean hardwood floors, she’d placed a few throw rugs that added a lived-in touch.

She had a live potted tree by one window, which looked similar to what had crashed through her loft window not too long ago.

At this blatant, obvious laugh-at-life, he grinned.

There were candles everywhere, along the walls, on the wide wooden window sills, all lit, casting a lovely glow on the early evening.

There was also one glaring detail he hadn’t failed to notice. Except for him, there were no people. No celebration, no friends, no customers. No one. “Suzanne?”

The swinging kitchen door rattled but didn’t open, and he heard another low oath. “You okay?” he called out.

“I’m…nearly ready- Damn it. ”

Cocking his head, he moved closer. He reached out to open the door, but paused when he heard a soft rain of more oaths.

“Idiot,” came her soft scathing voice. “You are such an idiot to think you could pull this off when you’re so nervous you can’t even light a candle.”

Unable to hold back his curiosity, he opened the door. Suzanne was hunched over the table. On a tray was an ice-cream sheet cake, decorated with chocolate writing he couldn’t yet read and a mass of small white candles, of which she was attempting, unsuccessfully, to light.

Instead of her usual hostess outfit of a white blouse and black skirt, she wore one of her loose, gauzy sundresses that he so associated with her and loved. Her long tanned, toned limbs, her nervous smile, her wild hair, all of it, every bit of her, made him physically ache.

“I can’t light the stupid candles,” she said.

“Here.” He ran his fingers down her arm to her shaking fingers, and lit them with her. “But if this is an ice-cream cake, you’re going to melt it before your guests arrive.”

She sucked in a breath and looked up at him. “My guest, my only guest, has arrived.”

HE JUST STARED AT HER. “What?”

Suzanne took a deep breath. She needed a hundred deep breaths. She set down the matches, turned her fingers so she could hold his hand and let out a shaky smile. “You’re the only one I invited.”

“So…” He looked confused, poor baby. “You’re not doing this? The whole catering company thing?”

“I’m doing this.” She hadn’t been prepared for the disappointment in his gaze, and realized he didn’t understand. That was her own fault. “I’m serious about the catering, and I’m serious about…”

“You’re serious about what, Suzanne?”

“You. Ryan, I’m serious about you.”

He looked down at their entwined fingers. “You had a funny way of showing it this morning.” He lifted his head and pierced her with those dark, hurt eyes. “Why did you sneak out of my bed like that, without a word?”

“I…” She bit her lower lip, searching for the right words. She’d been searching for them all day, a way to put meaning to how she felt. “I woke up first. You were wrapped around me, all warm and fast asleep and…” She blushed. “So incredibly sexy. I couldn’t stop looking at you.”

“You should have done more than look.”

Oh, his eyes were hot, and deeply intense. Her insides stirred. “Yes, I should have. But I didn’t want it to be in bed when I tell you for the first time. I didn’t want you to wonder if it was the heat of passion or just the moment.”

“When you tell me what?” His expression was carefully blank now, as if braced for a blow.

And her heart cracked. “When I tell you I love you.” Her throat tightened. “I love you so much, Ryan.”

He blinked. Put his hands on her upper arms and lifted her up to her toes so that they were nose to nose. “What?”

She smiled at his hoarse voice, though she was shaking so much she wondered if he’d be able to hold onto her. “Did you know, before you came into my life, I’d never had a man’s undivided attention? A man who really believed in me and what I could do?

I mean I had men who-”

“Suzanne.”

“Wanted me. I had men who-”

“Suzanne.”

She swallowed. Bit her lip. And finally, slowly, looked up at him. “Yeah?”

“Say it again.”

She put her hands on her face. Kissed him lightly.

Sank into him when he wrapped his arms around her. And felt her heart mend itself. “You taught me things about myself,” she said. “Did you know that?

I learned to be me. That it was good to be me. To follow my hopes and dreams, no matter how impossible it looks, no matter what the chances of failure are. The catering, for example. All I needed was a little encouragement-”

“Suzanne.” He put his forehead to hers. “I love you. I’ll always love you. And in a minute, I swear, I’ll give you all the encouragement you want, anything you want, but I really need to hear you say it again.”

“Well, I was getting to that.” Breaking free, she went for the cake, turned it to face him. “It’s starting to melt already.”

Ryan sighed. Okay, so she was trying to seduce him with the ice cream. Cute. Hot, even.

But it was a testament to how intensely he felt for her that he didn’t feel a sexual stirring but a deeper one, one of the heart and soul. “I don’t want cake-”

“Look.”

He stared down at the ice-cream cake, at the letters she’d painstakingly put there, the ones that spelled I Love You.

They were starting to drip but he got the picture.

She loved him.

She put her hands on his chest, wound them up and around his neck. “With all my heart, I love you.”

Hearing the words loosened the fist around his heart. Made him light-headed with joy. “I feel as if I’ve been waiting a lifetime to hear you say that.”

“I’m sort of hoping we have a lifetime ahead for me to keep on saying it.” Reaching out, she skimmed a finger along the cake. Studied the chocolate ice cream covered finger with a light in her eyes he was beginning to appreciate greatly.

“I was thinking we should probably get married,” she said, and on that shocking statement, she stroked his throat with her finger.

He sucked in a harsh breath at the cold. “Married?”

“Yeah.” Dipping her head, she licked the ice cream off his throat as if he were a lollipop. “Mmm,” she said very wickedly and made him groan.

“I figured since I took so long to figure out how to get what I want from life,” she said. “I don’t want to waste any more time. I know what I want, Ryan, and that’s you.” She put her mouth to the corner of his, then looked up at him. “You have a problem with a woman who knows what she wants in life?”

“No. I’m in love with one.”

She smiled widely at that, and he returned it, knowing his entire life was right here in his arms. “And it looks like I’m going to marry one.”

A WEEK LATER, Suzanne, Taylor and Nicole sat on the loft floor eating ice cream. The gallon had been provided by Nicole this time, as well as the plastic spoons with which they dug into the container.

Good, practical Nicole.

She’d moved in the night before, so Taylor had decided they needed a house-warming party.

Any excuse to consume calories.

“So, you’re really going to marry him, huh?” Nicole took another bite and looked at Suzanne with curiosity. “As in forever?”

“Yeah.” Suzanne grinned. “I really am.”

“Pretty scary stuff.”

“I know.” But she sighed with pure pleasure at the thought of finally being a bride, not an ounce of resistance left. “It’s right this time. This time it’s really right.” She smiled at Taylor. “I guess I’m breaking the vow.”