Marion Lennox - The Surgeon’s Family Miracle

‘Why would I not want him?’

‘What were we, Ben?’ she demanded, suddenly angry. ‘Babies ourselves. We were young for med school. We were young for life. You were so lit up about joining the army. You were off to save the world. Armies are used for peacekeeping, you told me, but it was excitement that was in your heart. Action. Drama. Sure, you didn’t want to fight, but you did want to go wherever there was action. And me…all I wanted to do was come home. My mother had sold everything she owned to send me to med school, and the islanders helped because everyone here needed a doctor. I was as excited as you were-but I was excited at coming home to help my people.’

‘Did it work out?’ he asked, and she took a deep breath. There wasn’t a trace of colour on her face. She looked sick.

‘I guess it did,’ she said slowly. ‘But there was a cost. My mother died just after I got back. She had cancer. She’d known for two years but she hadn’t told me because she hadn’t wanted to interrupt my studies.’

‘Oh, Lily…’

‘You see, when I found I was pregnant I was just as shocked as you would have been. We were so careful but, then, our lecturers used to say the only sure-fire contraception is a brick wall. We’re proof of that. So what could I do? You’d made it clear you never wanted a family. I couldn’t burden you with one, against your wishes.’ She steadied then, forcing her voice to sound neutral. ‘I had to come home. As it is, I’ve made a life for both of us here. Every islander loves Benjy. Every islander is his uncle or his aunt or his cousin, by traditional ties if not by blood.’

‘And he has Jacques?’

‘He has Jacques,’ she agreed, though it took her time to respond. Her voice was uncertain now, as if he’d touched a nerve.

‘They don’t get on?’

‘Why would you ask me that?’

‘It is my business if he’s my son.’

‘He’s not your son. I won’t burden you with him. He’s-’

‘Lily, I want him to be my son.’ The words surprised them both. They stopped, and a wave, higher than usual, washed in over their feet. Lily’s sandalled toes were washed clean. Ben was wearing tough army boots. The water receded and they hardly looked damp.

It was dumb to be looking at boots, Ben thought. The whole thing was dumb. Maybe Lily was right. Maybe he should back off right now.

But he had a son. By Lily.

And she looked distraught.

He reached out and touched her face. There was a fine coat of dust over everything, courtesy of setting up the field hospital on land where the grass had withered during the dry season. Dust was on Lily’s face, streaked now by tears, and he tracked a tear with his finger.

I wonder what this place is like in the rainy season, he thought inconsequentially.

Lily didn’t move. She submitted to his touch without comment.

‘I think I loved you, Lily,’ he said, and she managed a ghost of a smile.

‘Benjy was conceived in love,’ she whispered. ‘I’ve always believed that.’

‘It’s the truth.’

‘Just lucky we’re older, eh?’ she said, but her voice was strained to breaking point. She brushed his hand from her face, turned determinedly northward again and started walking. ‘Just lucky we’ve found sense.’

‘And you’ve found Jacques.’

‘As you say. Do you have anyone?’

‘No.’

‘You’re still running from relationships?’

‘I don’t run.’

‘No.’ She hesitated, and then glanced sideways at him. Cautious. ‘You’re angry?’

‘Maybe I am.’

‘Because I didn’t tell you about Benjy?

‘Yeah. But maybe you’re right,’ he said bleakly. ‘Maybe seven years ago I wouldn’t have wanted to know. I was dumb.’

‘We were both dumb.’

‘Mmm.’ He kicked some more sand and tried to think of other things besides how close this woman was, and how bereft she looked, and how he wanted to…

He couldn’t want. She had a life here and a son and a fiancé and he was here with a job to do.

He should be working. He should go back to the hospital and organise paperwork for the evacuations. He could help treat the minor wounds of islanders still cautiously presenting.

His team were doing that. He wouldn’t be needed again unless there was a blast-out in the hostage situation.

A blast-out. Benjy. His son.

Think of something else, he thought fiercely. They were nearing the headland where the compound lay and the strain on Lily’s face was well nigh unbearable. She was staring ahead as if she was willing herself to see through walls. He had to distract her.

‘Lily, there’s a couple of things bothering me.’

‘I don’t have time to-’

‘Not about us,’ he said gently. ‘About this situation. Can you help?’

She took a deep breath and steadied. ‘Of course.’

‘You told me seven years ago that this island was like a huge family. Everyone knew everyone and no one locked their doors. Is that right?’

‘Yes, but-’

‘But what?’ he asked. ‘The insurgents were forced to leave the hospital alone, and we’ve been wondering why. We’ve been told there’s been a drug problem on the island, so you’ve trained orderlies to act as security guards. Is that right?’

‘Yes, but-’

‘Do you know these drug users? Are they locals?’

‘No,’ she said slowly, and he knew she was having trouble concentrating, but she was determined to try. ‘We’ve had three break-ins over the last two months. None before. Down south there’s a surf camp. The surf here is fantastic and devotees come to train, but for the last couple of months there’s been guys there who are worrying. They just lie around and drink, and the break-ins started at the same time they arrived. They’ve had three-month visas. Our local policeman couldn’t find evidence to deport them, so he trained and armed our orderlies and we let it be known.’ She gave a rueful smile. ‘Our orderlies are the most peaceable of men, but it acted like a deterrent. The break-ins stopped.’

‘So where are these men now?’

‘Maybe I heard they were to go to one of the outer islands. I’m not sure.’

‘You never thought to get a profile on any of them?’

‘I’m a doctor. I didn’t think anything.’

‘But you-’

‘It’s not my responsibility,’ she flashed. ‘Ben, if you knew how hard I work… There’s no other doctor on any of these islands. Kapua’s the biggest in the chain but there’s twenty inhabited islands. The health service is me. No one wants to fly to Australia for treatment. Hardly anyone will leave their own island. Pregnant mothers are supposed to fly out to Fiji to give birth but hardly any do. Elderly islanders won’t leave, no matter how sick they are. I fly by the seat of my pants, doing what comes next, and policing isn’t on my list. Sure, our policeman should have investigated more, and maybe if I’d thought of it I would have reminded him, but I didn’t. I was just grateful the break-ins stopped.’

‘I’m sorry,’ he said, startled by her anger, and she stooped and picked up a shell and tossed it into the sea with such savagery that she came very near to knocking out a seagull. The gull rose with a startled shriek and Lily stared at it for a moment and then sighed.

‘Sorry, bird,’ she said. And then, ‘Sorry, Ben. It’s just…during med school everyone-including you-assumed I was coming home to an idyllic island existence. But this place…We need a full medical service, with helicopter evacuation, with at least two doctors and a set-up where I can do operations that involve more than me cutting frantically while I’m instructing Pieter in the niceties of anaesthesia.’ She broke off, turned her face to the council compound again and winced.