Susan Mallery: Full-Time Father

But were they willing to let him go? And even if they did, would anything change? Wasn’t he still a threat to everyone he cared about? Wasn’t it better for Erin, better for Christie, if they stuck to their plan?

Christie shifted so she lay on the warm sand and rested her head on his belly.

“There’s a birdie up there,” she said, pointing at the blue sky.

Parker squinted against the sun. “It’s just a speck. It must be very high.”

“Higher than our kite?”

“Yeah, but that’s not saying much.”

She giggled.

He laced his fingers behind his head and relaxed on the shore. Christie sighed as if she were drifting off to sleep. It was a lazy afternoon. She sighed again, then turned, and stretched out across his chest. Her eyes closed and her breathing became regular.

The trust inherent in her actions made his heart ache. How he loved this little girl. He would give his life for her. Emotions welled up inside him. They grew until the pressure was unbearable. He wanted to let them out, but he was afraid. Afraid of not being enough. Afraid of hurting her.

Erin’s words came back to him. She’d warned him he would have to give with his whole heart. He couldn’t hold back, not with Christie. The child would sense the truth. He wondered if that same rule applied to Erin. If he wanted her in his life, would he have to give with his whole heart? After all, she, too, would know if he held back.

But if he did as she asked, they were all at risk. Look at what had happened to Robin and to Stacey.

He had no answers to his questions. Maybe time was the solution. He would be a part of Christie’s world for the rest of her life.

But what about Erin?

That was less simple, he admitted. Once she left his house, he would lose his chance. They would return to their own schedules and the reality of getting through the day would gradually wear away at anything they might have had together. That would be best for both of them, but was it what he wanted? Was it what Erin wanted?

He stared up at the sky and realized he didn’t know what she wanted. He didn’t even know how she felt about him. She’d told him they couldn’t be lovers because eventually she might fall in love with him. How long would that take? A week? A month? A year?

Erin in love with him? The thought made his spirits soar. With her beside him, he could do anything. He could-He closed his eyes. He could destroy her.

So when the time was up, he would let her go.

Parker didn’t realize he’d drifted off to sleep until a sharp sound awakened him. Christie scrambled off him and jumped to her feet.

“Daddy, Daddy, it’s a dog!”

Sure enough a small dirty mutt came over the rocks at the end of the beach. The dog was about ten inches to the shoulder, all matted hair and big brown eyes. A long tail pumped back and forth as if finding people was the greatest joy in the animal’s life.

“He’s so cute,” Christie said, rushing toward the dog.

“Wait.” Parker grabbed her arm and held her in place. “Let’s make sure he’s friendly. Stay here.”

“But he wouldn’t hurt me.”

Parker stared at her. “Christie, this is a strange dog. It might be sick. If it bites you, then you’ll get sick, too. It’s better to be careful now. Please stay here.”

Her mouth drooped as she nodded her head. “Yes, Daddy.”

The little brown dog quivered as he approached. It rolled on its back and exposed a skinny belly. Parker let the animal sniff his hand and received a quick lick in return. He touched the dog’s stomach. The animal moaned in pleasure.

“He seems friendly enough,” Parker said, then frowned as he clearly felt ribs. Had the dog gotten lost or been abandoned? He sure hadn’t eaten in a while. He probably hadn’t had anything to drink, either. They hadn’t had rain in a couple of weeks.

Christie squatted next to him and held out her hand. When the dog licked it, she giggled. “He likes me.”

“Of course he does. Rub his belly like this.” He demonstrated the back-and-forth motion. The dog writhed and moaned, then jumped up and barked.

Christie clapped her hands together. “You want to play? Daddy, does the dog have a name?”

“Let me check.” He felt through the thick fur for a collar. There wasn’t one. “No tags. I wonder what happened to his owner.”

“Maybe he doesn’t have one. Maybe we can keep him. My very own puppy. Please say yes, Daddy, please?” The dog and the little girl stared at him with equally pleading expressions.

“We’ll see. For now, let’s give him some water.”

They’d brought a Thermos down with them. Parker poured water into a plastic cup and offered it to the dog. The animal drank greedily, then barked once and raced toward the steps. When Christie didn’t follow, he stopped and barked again.

“I think he wants to play,” Parker said.

“I’m coming,” she yelled, and ran after the dog.

The two of them played tag. Parker found a stick and threw it. The dog returned it and drank a bit more water. He was friendly and good-natured. Where were his owners?

When Christie and her new friend were tired from running, they started to explore the rocks at the far end of the beach. Parker tried his luck with the kite again. The wind had shifted and this time he managed to get it nearly as high as the top of the cliffs.

He let out more string. “Look, Christie,” he called.

There was no answer.

He glanced toward the rocks but didn’t see anything-not even his daughter. The piles of boulders were about twelve feet high, the result of a rock slide nearly a century before. He’d never bothered exploring the other side.

“Christie?”

He couldn’t see the dog, but suddenly it started barking.

He dropped the kite and ran toward the sound. “Christie!”

He searched the boulders and couldn’t find them. The barking came from somewhere else. Inside the rocks. But he couldn’t get there from this side of the beach. The rocks stretched out twenty feet into the ocean. The bottom dropped quickly and the water would be well over Christie’s head.

Parker’s heart pounded and fear chilled him. “Christie, honey, can you hear me?”

He scrambled over the rocks, trying to figure out where a four-year-old would want to go. The rough surface scraped his hands and caught his jeans, but he continued searching frantically. The little dog whimpered. He followed the sound, peering between boulders. Then he saw it. A bit of pink lying below him on the sand. Christie’s shirt. A foot in front of him was the hole she’d slipped through. She was lying very still.

“Christie!” He tried to fit through the hole but he was too big. Then he saw the dog next to her, tugging at her clothing. Parker realized the tide was rushing in and was nearly up to her thighs.

“God, no!”

He was frantic with dread. He had to get her out of there. In another few minutes, the tide would catch her and carry her out. But how to reach her?

The little dog barked again and Parker realized the animal couldn’t have gone through the hole, either. It was too far down. So there had to be another way to that small stretch of beach. The dog had come over the rocks. He could go back the same way.

Parker moved quickly, jumping from boulder to boulder. When he reached the far side, he saw a small cave.

“Christie?”

The dog ran out and tugged on his pant leg.

“I know, boy,” he said. “I’m here.”

He crawled into the shallow cave. Christie was lying facedown on the sand. Her left arm was bent awkwardly, probably broken. His heart stopped. Dear God, he couldn’t lose her, too.

Then she stirred. Her eyes fluttered open. Tears filled them. “Daddy, my arm hurts.”