Miranda Lee - Contract with Consequences

‘I did. I probably would have stayed living there indefinitely if my housekeeper-a truly sweet lady named Bianca whom I was very fond of-hadn’t been killed. Stabbed to death by a gang of street kids she’d been trying to help.’

‘Oh, John, that’s awful!’

‘It was. She was such a good woman. She used to go out every night and take food to the homeless. If I wasn’t away working or out clubbing for the night, I’d go with her-not because I was a saint like she was, but because I was worried about her safety. The places she used to go were downright dangerous. I tried to stop her going out alone when I wasn’t there, but she took no notice of me. She said she’d be fine. Said if she didn’t help those poor kids, who would?

“When I came home early one morning to find a police car parked outside my house, I knew something bad had happened to Bianca. I have to confess I went crazy when I found out she was dead. I wanted to kill the little bastards who did it to her. As it was, I beat the hell out of a couple of them. The police weren’t impressed, and gave me a warning. At the time, I didn’t give a damn. They weren’t doing anything that I could see to solve Bianca’s murder. Anyway, I knew if I stayed there, I might do something really stupid so I sold up and left.’

‘Just as well you did. Does your family know any of this?’

‘Of course not!’

‘But why ever not?’

‘Because it’s my private and personal business, not theirs.’

‘So they don’t know about your housekeeper being killed? Or that you’ve left South America for good? Or that you’re going to live and work here in Australia in future?’

‘Not yet. Wait a second,’ he went on quickly when he saw her mouth opening. ‘Let me finish before you get on your high horse and start tearing strips off me for being a secretive and unloving son. I will tell them. Well… not the bit about Bianca. Just that I’ve come home to Australia to live and work. Meanwhile, they’re none the wiser and no one is getting hurt.’

Scarlet pressed her lips tightly together to stop herself from telling him that he was always hurting his family by his long absences, especially his mother. Carolyn had been quite upset when he’d left so soon after her party. She’d be even more upset if she knew he was up here in Darwin, holidaying, whilst she thought he was in Brazil working.

‘Now, if you must know the truth, I do not actually hate my father. My emotions where he is concerned are not that simple.’

Scarlet blinked. What on earth could have possibly happened to sour the relationship between father and son so?

‘You won’t know this since my parents don’t speak of it, but I was born a twin.’

‘A twin!’ Scarlet exclaimed, totally taken aback.

‘Yes. I had a brother, Josh, born a few minutes before me. We were identical twins. Identical in genes but, as is often the case, not identical in nature. He was the extrovert; I, the introvert. He was hyperactive and rather naughty, but a real little charmer. He could talk when he was just a toddler. I was quieter and much less communicative. People thought I was shy but I wasn’t. I was just… self-contained.’

Scarlet had an awful feeling about what was coming. After all, no twin brother named Josh had moved into the house opposite hers. She braced herself for bad news but it still shocked her.

‘Josh drowned in our back-yard pool when he was four,’ John went on. ‘Mum was on the phone one day and we were playing outside. Josh pulled a chair over to the childproof fence and attempted to climb over it. But he fell off the top of the fence and hit his head before toppling into the pool. I stood there for far too long in shock before running screaming for my mother. By the time she pulled Josh out of the pool, he was dead.’

‘Oh, John,’ Scarlet choked out as tears welled up into her eyes. ‘How tragic.’

John stiffened when he saw the evidence of her sympathy. This was what he could not stand. This was why he’d never told anyone this story. Because he didn’t want to feel what he was feeling at that moment-as though he was somehow to blame for Josh’s death. Logic told him it couldn’t possibly have been his fault, but logic meant nothing to a four-year-old seeing his mother almost catatonic with shock and his father weeping in despair. It welled up in him again, the guilt and the grief. Because he’d loved Josh just as much as his parents. He’d been his twin brother. His flesh and blood. They’d been inseparable from birth.

But no one had cared about his grief.

John could not believe how painful he still found the memory. Damn it, he would not show weakness in front of Scarlet.

‘To cut a long story short,’ he said abruptly, ‘My father did something the night after Josh’s death which affected me very badly. When I saw him sitting in an armchair in our lounge, with his head in his hands, I ran up to him and put my arms around him. He pushed me away and told my mother to put me to bed, that he couldn’t stand to look at me.’

Scarlet sucked in sharply. What a dreadful thing for John’s father to say!

‘Later that night, he did come into my room to kiss me goodnight, but I turned my face away and refused to let him kiss me. He just shrugged and walked away. After that, I stopped speaking to him altogether for a very long time. In fact I totally ignored him for years. He didn’t seem to mind or care. He was no longer the father I’d once adored. He was just an empty shell of a man. My mother could see what was going on but she was a mess herself for ages and didn’t seem to know what to say or do to make things right. She didn’t recover till she had Melissa. She was the one who insisted we sell our old house and move-for a fresh start, she’d said. It made no difference to Dad. Or to me. He became a grouch and a workaholic and I became what you know I became. An angry, resentful boy.’

Scarlet had started gnawing at her bottom lip to stop herself from weeping. What a sad, sad story. Her heart went out to John as she began to understand what had made him the way he was. How incredibly hurt he must have been. No wonder he retreated into himself. And no wonder he didn’t stay around his family for too long.

‘I’m surprised you’re as civil to your father as you are,’ she said with feeling.

‘He’s mellowed since he retired. I can’t say that I’ve totally forgiven or forgotten, but hatred and revenge never get you anywhere. Now that I’ve grown up, I can see that parents aren’t perfect. They’re just human beings. Josh had been the apple of Dad’s eye and Josh was dead. Grief can make you say dreadful things.’

He had said appalling things to Bianca’s family after she was killed, blaming them for not going with her that night. They’d been amazingly understanding of his grief and had not taken his accusations to heart. But he’d still felt terrible afterwards, once he calmed down. It was one of the reasons he’d given them his house and everything in it. To make it up to them.

‘Have you ever confronted your Dad over what he said and did that night?’ Scarlet asked, frowning thoughtfully.

‘No.’

‘At least your mother loved you and your brother equally,’ she pointed out.

‘I’m sure she did. But then Melissa came along, and Mum simply doted on her.’

‘All mothers dote on their daughters, John. It didn’t mean she loved you any less. To be fair to your mum, by then you were not the most lovable boy in the world.’

John laughed. ‘Trust you to make me stop pitying myself.’

‘That wasn’t my intention. But do you know what, John? Things might not have been quite the way they seemed back then. I’ve been thinking…’

John sighed a weary sigh. ‘What about this time?’