Beth Ciotta: Anything but Love

Luke reached down for his backpack and when he straightened the infuriating enigma was finishing off another shot.

For the love of …

He couldn’t leave Rae in this bar. What if she drank herself under the table? What if one of the several men watching took advantage?

“Do you think your mom and Stein left the house yet?”

“I’m sure of it. God forbid they miss a moment of the party.”

“Then come on. I’ll drop you home before I head to the airport.”

“I’m not going home.” She flashed a key card. “I’m staying here tonight.”

“Then I’ll walk you to your room.”

“Not necessary.” She stood, swaying a little on those sexy four-inch heels.

Luke groaned. “Humor me.”

She wasn’t drunk, but she was buzzed. The longer Luke had sat next to Rae, the more she’d wanted to numb her senses. He made her ache for Sugar Creek and the simple life she’d created there. She missed her friends in the Cupcake Lovers. She missed the children she’d bonded with through Sugar Tots. She mourned the fact that she’d probably never find the kind of love that existed between Chloe and Dev, Rocky and Jayce, Monica and Leo. She’d had the misfortune of falling for Luke Monroe, who clearly thought the worst of her and who wasn’t at all who she’d built him up to be.

He expected her to spill her guts, to share her most intimate problems as though he were her friend. A friend wouldn’t make her feel like the most selfish person on earth. Christmas Eve, her birthday, was always difficult. Luke had made it intolerable.

To make matters worse, all she could think about was their one spontaneous kiss and what might have happened if they hadn’t been interrupted. Luke’s presence rekindled the burning desires she’d worked weeks to snuff.

“This is it.” The number on the door was a little fuzzy, but she heard a click when she swiped the key card and the handle moved, so good. This was good. She’d found her room. He could go and maybe she’d be able to breathe. She turned to say good-bye, only her heel caught in the carpet and she teetered and knocked into the hard chest of Luke.

Tall, sexy, handsome-as-sin Luke.

He steadied her and … bam.

Suddenly they were kissing. She wasn’t sure who started it but no one was ending it. The kiss was frenzied, impassioned. He backed her into the room and against the wall.

The door snicked closed, shutting out the world, muting reality. Not the heiress and the bartender. Just two people in crazy blind lust.

He dropped his bag and coat.

She ditched her purse and shoes.

Her senses exploded as they grappled and soul-kissed.

The same spark as before, only more.

More was not enough.

Rae shoved Luke’s shirt off his shoulders then fumbled with the fly of his jeans.

He unzipped her dress, unhooked her bra.

His palm seared the bare skin of her back while his other hand smoothed up her thigh, under her dress.

His lips, his tongue … Heaven .

But then he broke off. “Tell me to go.”

She couldn’t. Not yet.

“Dammit.”

She backed him against the opposite wall, her actions frantic as she tugged at his clothes and ate him up like a starving sexaholic.

Feel me. Take me .

Pent-up yearning and frustration overshadowed rational thought.

They had no future.

But I can have now .

His mouth was magic, his touch perfection. Skilled. Seductive. The earth moved. No, she moved. Luke spun their position, pinning her between his hard body and the solid wall. She nearly lost it when he tugged at her thong. When the tip of his shaft grazed and … God .

One swift thrust. Luke was inside her, filling her, rocking her, taking her hard against the wall.

Her heart nearly burst through her ribs, her lungs burned. Every fiber of her being vibrated with heady pleasure. So primal. So perfect.

Rae shuddered with a mind-blowing orgasm. A wondrous sensation that echoed through her being like a never-ending aftershock. Luke peaked with her. It was powerful and amazing, wonderfully amazing.

Until he froze.

She felt the tension in his shoulders, sensed a rising darkness.

He still held her close, was still inside of her, but his forehead banged to the wall. “Christ.”

The horror in his tone twisted her heart into a bleeding knot.

“Why didn’t you stop me? Why…” Another head bang. “Dammit!”

Rae was too stunned, too dazed to speak. Why was he so upset? So they’d had sex. So it was a onetime thing. Luke Monroe was a notorious hound. He typically juggled three girls at a time. He was no stranger to casual sex. She knew his motto. Everyone in Sugar Creek knew his motto. No strings attached.

“Are you protected?”

Her reeling mind glitched. “What?”

“Christ, Rae. No condom.”

Her heart and brain stuttered back to life. Her stomach churned. “I’m on birth control.”

“Great. Good. That’s something.”

His attitude was less than romantic. All she sensed was remorse on his part whereas she was still semiflying from the greatest orgasm of her life. Why was that anyway? She refused to attach it to love. Loving Luke would only end in heartbreak. He’d already done a pretty good job of crushing her tender feelings.

Suddenly, painfully aware that her dress was hiked to her waist and his jeans were around his ankles, Rae tried to disentangle herself from Luke with some modicum of dignity.

Earning her master’s had been easier.

Luke—handsome-as-sin, confident, jovial, playboy Luke Monroe—looked at Rae as if she were a two-headed monster of seduction. “Why—”

“Maybe I just needed to get you out of my system. Thank you for that. Happy birthday to me.”

She wasn’t sure why she’d been so flip, so crass. It wasn’t like her. Except her pride was smarting. She hated that Luke was looking at her like she was the biggest mistake of his life when he was her bona fide favorite.

Drawing on her mother’s questionable acting skills, Rae rolled her eyes. “It was sex, just sex, and not even great sex at that. Go home, Luke.”

She slipped into the bathroom and locked the door, fighting tears, fighting nausea. Now, in addition to thinking she was a lying, selfish rich bitch, he also thought her a slut. People were always labeling her something or another based on stereotypes. She shouldn’t care.

She cared.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry .

Luke knocked on the door.

Rae turned on the shower.

When at long last the outer door finally opened and shut, Rae cried.

Six weeks later …

Sugar Creek, Vermont

“Ah, come on. They can’t be that bad.”

“No offense, Luke, but these are quite possibly the worst cupcakes I’ve ever tasted.”

Luke raised a brow at his sister’s blunt assessment of his chocolate cupcakes. Rocky always shot straight from the hip. Usually he liked that about her. But not right now. A little encouragement would be nice.

“I don’t know about the worst,” Chloe said. Although she was still grimacing after swallowing.

“Don’t sugarcoat it, kitten,” Daisy said. “He’ll never learn if you do.”

“I’m not sure he can learn.” This from Ethel Larsen, one of the senior members of the Cupcake Lovers and one of Daisy’s closest friends. “Luke, honey. Just because your grandma, sister, and cousin have a gift for baking, that doesn’t mean you automatically do.”

“Sam’s the one who told me to get a hobby,” Luke reminded them. Apparently, Luke had been driving his friends and family crazy for several weeks. Not on purpose, but he was bored. He wasn’t dating anyone and he didn’t like being alone. He could only work so many hours at the Sugar Shack, so he’d been volunteering to help folks with various projects or trying to rope them into social activities. When Sam had suggested Luke take up a hobby, Sam had been on his way to the weekly Cupcake Lovers meeting and Luke had thought, what the hell. He’d been working hard to mend bridges with Sam, and maybe they could man-bond over man cakes.