Maya Banks - Softly at Sunrise

She smiled, mustering all her control to prevent the shaking that usually accompanied the flashbacks. She reached for the wine and nodded. “I’m fine. Just thinking.”

Ethan handed over the glass and then settled on the couch beside her.

“Whatever you were thinking, it couldn’t have been good. You were pale, and your eyes were so distant that you didn’t seem to be here at all.”

“It was nothing. I’d rather focus on us. And the move to our brand new house.”

She held up her glass, and he gently clinked his to hers.

“I’m going to miss this place,” he said. “Lot of memories tied up here. I can understand why Mom and Dad are reluctant to relocate. They’ve been in that house my whole life. I can’t imagine them anywhere else.”

She swallowed and then sipped at her wine.

“You sure this is what you want to do?” he asked.

Her eyes widened. “We’re certainly beyond that point now. The other house is already built! What on earth would we do with it if we decided not to move?”

He shrugged. “Van and Joe haven’t built houses yet. One of them could always take it.”

She shook her head. “No. I love that house. It’s perfect. I’m excited to move into it.”

He studied her a minute as if deciding whether to state what was on his mind. Then he leaned over to put his glass on the end table.

“You aren’t happy here, are you?” he said bluntly.

She froze, because she hadn’t wanted him to know just how much she wanted to be free of this house and its hold on her. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel guilty. They’d wasted enough time on guilt and anguish. It served no purpose. They’d never move on if they were always dwelling on the past.

The doorbell rang, and she nearly sighed an audible sound of relief.

“I’ll get it. You sit,” Ethan said as he sprang upward.

He walked to the front door and opened it, and a mere second later, Rusty entered the living room.

Rachel smiled and got up to hug the other woman.

“Rusty! I’m so glad to see you!” Rachel stepped back to examine the smiling girl. “You’re looking so gorgeous! How is school?”

Rusty dipped her head a little shyly but beamed at Rachel’s compliment. And it was true. Rusty had blossomed into a beautiful young lady. A long way from the scrawny, surly teenager with ragged, brightly dyed hair who’d stolen into Marlene and Frank Kelly’s house a few years earlier.

She could definitely still hold her own with the Kelly clan and could be plenty sassy when the occasion called for it, but Rusty had softened under the love and tutelage of Marlene and the rest of the Kellys.

“I heard you went back to work today,” Rusty said after offering Rachel her own enthusiastic hug. “How did it go?”

There was worry in the other girl’s eyes, and Rachel’s heart squeezed. She and Rusty hadn’t always had the best relationship. Rusty had entered the Kellys’ lives at the precise time when Rachel had been rescued and returned to her family. Rusty had feared that concern for Rachel would overshadow her own existence and that she’d be discarded and sent on her way.

“It was scary and wonderful at the same time,” Rachel said. “Hard to believe I can be intimidated by a bunch of junior high kids, but believe me, they’re pretty terrifying!”

Rusty laughed. “I remember me at that age so I can well understand why you’d be shaking in your shoes.”

“Where’s Ma?” Ethan asked. “I thought she was coming with you?”

Rusty turned to Ethan. “She said to tell you she’ll be here as soon as she can. Sophie was running late, and Marlene was keeping Charlotte for her.”

Ethan’s cell rang, and he made a grab for it, turning away from the two women as he answered.

Rachel took Rusty’s hand and dragged her toward the couch. “So how are you doing in your classes, and how are you liking college?”

Rusty’s eyes glowed with excitement. “I love it. It’s as you said. Scary and wonderful all at the same time. There are so many people. Everywhere. And from all over! I’d never been out of Dover my entire life so it was like culture shock. But it’s fun, and I’ve made so many good friends. There’s so much to do.”

“You’re keeping up with your studies, right?” Rachel asked.

Rusty grinned. “You sound just like Marlene. And yes, I’m doing very well. Better than I would have ever thought I was capable of. I have one B, but it’s a high B, so I think I can bring it up to an A before the semester is over. I have As in everything else. Who would have thought that I would ever be an honor student!”

“You’re smarter than all of us,” Rachel said dryly. “It was always just a matter of focusing your efforts in a positive direction.”

“Sorry to interrupt, girls, but I’m going to head over to round up a crew to help move furniture. Sam has a delivery truck he’s borrowed, and we’re going to bring it over here to load up as much stuff as we can this evening.”

Rachel smiled up at her husband. “Okay. We’ll work on packing some of the smaller boxes while we wait for Marlene. I should probably put in a pizza order for later. Everyone will be starving.”

Ethan dropped a kiss on her lips. “Let us worry about the food. If I know Ma, she’s already prepared a feast, and she’ll probably come over loaded for bear.”

“True,” Rachel said ruefully. “Okay, off with you. I’ll see you and your brothers in a bit.”

Rusty also stood and motioned toward the boxes. “Is there any particular place you want me to start?”

Rachel rose, setting her glass down beside Ethan’s on the end table. She’d only had a sip, but her stomach was roiling, and a clammy sweat had broken out on her forehead.

Without saying a word to Rusty, she hurried past her and to the guest bathroom down from the kitchen. She barely made it to the toilet before her stomach heaved and ejected the contents.

A soothing hand rubbed up and down her back as Rusty’s anxious question was issued. “Rachel, are you all right? Should I call Ethan back?”

Rachel shook her head as she wiped at her mouth with a towel. “N-no,” she said shakily. “I’m fine. Really.”

When she lifted her head, she saw Rusty frowning at her.

“You aren’t fine. You were puking your guts up. What’s going on?”

Rachel swallowed nervously and then went to the sink to wash out her mouth. She gargled with mouthwash, praying it wouldn’t send her back to the toilet to vomit again. She leaned against the sink, her hands braced on the countertop, as she stared at herself in the mirror.

It was time to stop discounting the possibility. Having the wine had been irresponsible. She knew she could be. Even if she’d thought it unlikely that it would happen this soon.

“Rusty?” she said faintly. “Is there any way you could do me a favor?”

Rusty came up behind her and put her hand on her shoulder. “Of course. Just tell me what you need.”

Rachel turned, taking Rusty’s hand in hers. “I don’t want you to tell anyone about this, okay? Promise me.”

Rusty frowned but nodded.

“If you leave now, you could get back before everyone gets over here. But you’ll have to hurry.”

Rusty cocked her head to the side. “What are you wanting?”

Rachel took a deep breath. “Is there any way you could run to the pharmacy and buy an over-the-counter pregnancy test for me?”

Rachel paced the confines of the living room, the wait for Rusty to return an eternity. She checked her watch and then looked anxiously out the window. She didn’t expect Ethan for a while yet. The compound was across the lake, and he’d no doubt get sidetracked talking to his brothers before they made their way back over. But Marlene could show up at any time, and while Rachel loved her dearly, she wasn’t ready to tell anyone of her suspicion yet. The last thing she wanted was to build anyone’s hopes only for it to be a false alarm.