Penelope Douglas - Until You

“I didn’t have a chance,” I gritted out, waving my hand. “You crept into my room and jumped on my cock so fast this morning—”

“Ugh!” she growled and slammed her knee right between my legs.

I hunched forward and fell to one knee.

Shit, shit, shit … I moaned as a white hot pain shot through my groin.

Jesus Christ, Tate!

My eyes squeezed shut, and I breathed in and out quickly, trying to keep my legs from collapsing underneath me.

My fucking dick was on fire and nausea rolled through my stomach in waves. Holy mother…

I sucked in breath after breath, trying not to vomit…or cry.

Tate was gone. I didn’t see her leave, but I felt her absence.

And there I was. Alone, and stupid in a hallway full of people I couldn’t see, because I was blurry-eyed and shaking.

Tatum Fucking Brandt.

She was going to kill me.

Weight hit my shoulder, and I sank forward a little farther.

“She does that well, doesn’t she?”

Madoc.

He helped me up, and I leaned against the lockers, trying to stay upright. The initial shock had passed, but I was still in bad shape.

That sucked, and I never wanted to feel that again.

“The video?” I grunted, wanting to sound tough but my voice cracked like I was almost in tears.

“Your brother.” He nodded. “I saw him catch the show on his phone last night when you weren’t paying attention, but I had no idea what he was doing with it.” He raised his eyebrows. “Until this morning when he emailed it to me.”

“Goddamn, you two,” I cursed. “And you thought it would be a good idea to send that to everyone?”

“Yeah.” He nodded resolutely, his eyes lighting up. “I thought it was a perfect idea to send it to everyone. Let them see that piece of shit whimpering. Give him a taste of his own medicine.”

“Well, Tate’s blaming me now.”

“Well…” he started laughing, “I didn’t know she’d react like that, but you knew you had that coming, right?”

He was laughing? Yeah, this was real fuckin’ funny.

“She overreacted.” I stood up straight, trying to nonchalantly massage my dick back to life in a hallway full of people. “I took the high road last night. Besides, after what that dickhead did, did she really think I was going to do nothing? And why did it bother her anyway?”

The questions just kept coming. Tate shouldn’t have been that angry.

Sweat covered my neck and back, and I felt like chasing her down and throwing her over my shoulder.

“Tate’s got baggage, thanks to us. Trust issues,” Madoc continued and walked around in front of me. “Look.” He lowered his eyes and shook his head. “Normally, I couldn’t care less about who you screwed or what kind of trouble you got yourself into. I’ve sat back and let you self-destruct. But Tate? She’s our shortie. Now, go fix your shit.”

I watched him walk away, more and more baffled by how my friend continued to surprise me.

Was he right?

Yeah.

Tate needed to trust me. We were still working on that, and I could’ve gotten into trouble last night. She would’ve been worried and pissed if anything had happened to me, or I’d done something stupid.

I’m sure she was also still insecure about anything that she imagined went down between K.C. and I. Me being in the same place as her friend, without her, would piss her off.

I barreled down the hallway, ready to yank her out of Calculus, but I slowed when I got caught by the masses in the school all headed the same direction.

The crowd was a mess of people walking, yelling, and whispering. I saw some still looking at their phones—the video, no doubt—and some people were calling my name, but I ignored them.

Where the fuck was everyone going?

And that’s when I remembered.

The auditorium.

We were having that assembly this morning.

On bullying.

I ran my fingers through my hair, hard enough to massage my scalp, and let out a long, tired breath.

Great. I think I’d enjoy cutting off my arm and rubbing salt in it more.

Dammit.

I charged and weaved as quickly as I could through the long line of students trying to make their way through the two sets of double doors to the auditorium.

“Jared,” someone called out, but I waved them off without looking.

Tate was in here somewhere, so I scanned the rows as I walked down the aisles. We boasted about two thousand students at our school, but the freshmen were at a separate assembly in the gym, so this crowd wasn’t as thick as it usually was.

Looking for blonde hair was a nightmare. I’d really never noticed how many blondes we had until now.

But I knew Tate.

And I’d know her when I saw her, so I surveyed quickly before we were ordered to sit down.

Walking down the center aisle and back up, I felt my heart race when I saw her purple Chuck poking into the center aisle. Her legs were crossed, and one foot darted out of the row.

Quickly, I walked up the violet colored carpet path and placed my hands on her arm rest, leaning down.

“We need to talk.” I spoke low. “Now.”

Her blue eyes narrowed on me, and my mouth went dry.

My voice had sounded like a warning, and I was just digging myself in deeper here.

Calm down, man. My stomach tightened, and I didn’t know if I liked the drama, or if I was just so used to it. But it was something I did well, so I engaged her.

This wasn’t the time or place, but fuck it.

“Now, you want to talk,” she taunted, and I noticed Jess Cullen, her cross-country captain, sitting next to her, completely still as she watched us.

Tate stared ahead, refusing to look at me. “You get to react and behave without any by-your-leave from anyone else, but I’m supposed to drop my shit when you want my attention.”

It wasn’t a question. It was an assessment.

“Tatum—”

“Now I’m Tatum,” she sneered and looked at Jess. “Funny how that works, isn’t it?” she asked.

“What are you mad about? Last night wasn’t to hurt you.”

I gripped the arm rest tighter. I loved her anger. Always had.

Our first kiss on the sink ledge, and I was hers.

But, right now, she wasn’t angry so much as she was distant. Her chin was tipped down, and she still hadn’t looked at me.

That, I didn’t like.

“You don’t involve me,” she spoke, barely unclenching her teeth. “You don’t share anything with me until you run the risk of losing me. Everything is on your terms…on your schedule. I’m always on the outside, and I have to push my way in.”

Her face was as hard as stone as she gazed out in front of her. “I’ll talk to you, Jared. Just not now. And not for a while. I need some time to think.”

“To come to your own conclusions,” I accused.

“No choice when I’m the only one in the relationship. You humiliated me in the hallway before. Again! You throw me under the bus for your own amusement. When have you ever sacrificed yourself for me?” her calm voice spit back at me.

Air poured in and out of my lungs, thick and painful.

I’d barely gotten her back.

She doubted me. Doubted my commitment to her.

And how could I blame her?

Why should she trust me? I’d told her I loved her. I’d tried to show her. But I’d never shown her that I would put her first.

She’d seen me with my hands all over a ton of girls that weren’t her.

She’d felt the pain, time and again, as I’d thrown her to the wolves and made her a joke in front of everyone.

She’d seen me delight in her tears and isolation.

At that moment, the full consequences of my actions descended on my body like a pile of garbage, and I was buried.