Kristen Ashley - Games of the Heart

Still, it wasn’t lost on me that if Darrin was alive, regardless of the fact he was religious, conservative and I was his baby sister, he’d be doing cartwheels knowing I was naked in bed with Mike Haines.

And part of this not being lost on me was the part that sucked because Darrin was no longer alive.

I knew my thoughts had drifted but I didn’t know how deeply or that my eyes had until I heard Mike call, “Dusty?” and felt his arm give me a squeeze.

My eyes left the pillow beside his head and went to his to see not only were his on me but he was no longer on the phone.

Mike caught one look at my eyes and whispered, “Honey,” as he tossed his phone on the bed, his other arm came around me and I knew he read me.

“Sorry,” I whispered back.

“Don’t be.” He, too, was still whispering.

“You ever lose anyone close?” I asked, he shook his head and I felt my lips curve but I didn’t feel the feeling I usually felt when they did that. “I’m glad for that for you,” I said softly.

“My job, I deal with a lot of loss, Dusty, and you’ll get through,” Mike assured me.

“I know, I just don’t wanna have to.”

“Bet not,” he muttered then sat up, taking me with him, shifting me and the covers fell down around our waists as he settled sitting up with me straddling him. He had one arm wrapped around my hips, the other one angled up my back with his hand flat and warm between my shoulder blades. I tipped my head down to look at him and saw he was already looking up at me. “Like I said, my job, see a lot of loss. Never get used to it. So I guess, being removed and feeling that, you experiencing it, the bad news is, you’ll never get used to not having Darrin anymore. So there are no magic words. There’s no way to ease the pain. This is just life and like anything, you keep on living it and just learn to deal.”

“Don’t beat around the bush, darlin’,” I repeated his words from earlier as a lame joke and, even though we both knew it fell flat, he still was a good guy so he smiled at me. I liked his smile so I curled a hand around the side of his neck and my arm around his shoulders. Once I’d latched on, I dipped my face close and promised, “I’ll learn to deal.”

He tipped up his chin, pressing his hand between my shoulder blades and touched his lips to mine. Then he settled back and said softly, “And I’ll go get pizza.”

“I bet pizza will help me deal,” I guessed and got another smile. This one hit his eyes and I liked it a whole lot more.

“Yeah, bet it will. Now shift off me, Angel, I gotta get dressed.”

I shifted off him but I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to because his body was hard, warm, big and I liked being wrapped around it with his arms wrapped around me.

And I didn’t want to because he called me “Angel”. He was the only one who ever called me “Angel”. He started to call me that within weeks of him dating Debbie. I didn’t know why he did it because I wasn’t an angel, I was a rascal or at least that was what my Dad thought of me and thus that was my Dad’s nickname for me. But, for whatever reasons he called me that, I’d loved it then and I loved it now.

But more, I loved it that he remembered to call me “Angel”. Time had gone by, not a little of it, a lot. And as that time went by, I thought of him and not only when Darrin was informing on him to me. Mike Haines had popped into my mind often as I lived my life. And each time, he felt good there. In fact, it wasn’t unheard of for me to talk about him. All my closest friends knew all about him, including updates on his life after Darrin reported in. I didn’t know if the same happened with him about me. But I liked it that he didn’t forget something important to me.

I pulled the covers up to my chest, watched as he tugged on his clothes and listened as he said, “Gonna hit my house, change, go get the pizza and be back. Probably take twenty minutes, half an hour.”

“Later, do you have to get back to your kids?” I asked and his eyes came to me as he buttoned up his shirt.

“They’re with their mother this weekend.”

Lucky, lucky me.

“So is that a no?” I asked quietly and hopefully.

“Is that an invitation to spend the night?” he asked back, not quietly.

“Yes,” I answered, also not quietly.

He finished with his buttons, his hands went to his hips but his eyes didn’t leave me.

Then it was Mike talking quietly when he stated, “While I’m gone, honey, I need you to think. I came in here bein’ a dick, out of line and I wound you up. You’ve lost Darrin and I know you’re in pain. But what you said earlier, I’ll tell you now, I agree. About two seconds into that kiss, it became somethin’ different for me. Pleased as fuck to hear you felt the same.” He grinned a gentle grin before he went on, “Now, I’m glad you liked what we had in that bed, because, bottom line, I liked it too and when I say that, Angel, I liked it too. And I can walk away after pizza happy I gave you that in the middle of a shitty time for you. But, before I get back, you gotta think about if what you said is true. If this is about working through your pain with me, I gave what I’m gonna give to that. If this is about something else, then I’ll be spending the night.”

“You really don’t beat around the bush, do you?” I whispered, liking that too.

A whole lot.

“Got two kids, a bitch of an ex-wife who made my life a misery and went through somethin’ which meant I lost my shot at a good thing that would make me happy. Since I had a taste of a good thing, I know what I’m lookin’ for. And since I lost that, I’m not a man prone to dickin’ around. Not anymore.”

There it was. He didn’t beat around the bush.

Yep, I liked that.

A whole lot.

“I’ll search my feelings while you’re gone, Mike,” I told him softly.

That was when he walked to the bed, reached out, grasped my hips and pulled me toward him. When he had me where he wanted me, he put a hand in the bed on either side of my hips and leaned in so his face was an inch away from mine.

Then, softly back, he said, “I’d appreciate that, Dusty.”

All that was hot. Every word he’d said. Every move he’d made.

And that had nothing to do with me working through pain.

Not one thing.

It was just hot.

“Now,” he ordered, “kiss me.”

That was hot too so I leaned up and pressed my mouth to his.

His arm sliced around my back and pulled me up harder so my body was pressed to his and he took my lip touch straight to a hard, deep, wet kiss.

I liked that a whole lot more.

“Be back, no later than thirty,” he whispered against my lips when he stopped kissing me.

I gave a slight nod in the space he allowed and tried to regulate my breathing.

I watched his eyes smile.

Then he set me in bed, let me go, sat on the side of the bed and dealt with his socks and shoes.

“Keycard, nightstand,” I told him when he stood. He looked down at me. Not done giving me Mike Lovin’, he wrapped a hand around the back of my head, leaned in and touched his mouth to mine.

Then he let me go again, stretched out an arm and nabbed his phone. Then he reached down, grabbed his suit jacket and I watched him move to the nightstand, tag the keycard then I watched him lift a hand, flick out two fingers and shoot me a grin before he left the room.

The door had just closed behind him when I dropped to my back and stared at the ceiling.

Moments passed before, my eyes on the ceiling, I asked my brother, “Happy?”

Darrin didn’t reply but I knew my brother. No way in hell he’d want to leave the wife he loved, the boys who meant the world to him, a father who he respected and taught him how to be a man, the mother who doted on him and taught him how to love or the sisters who worked his nerves but he loved all the same.