Bella Andre: Just To Be With You

“Mia would be very proud of you for not giving in to the urge. And don’t worry,” Tatiana said as she moved closer and took the football out of his hands, just in case he changed his mind and decided to nail Ford after all, “it will be our secret that you were even thinking of doing it.”

Just then, as his sister came out into the yard and put her arms around Ford’s waist, Ian couldn’t decide what was harder right then: not letting himself turn to drink in Tatiana’s beauty, or keeping his gaze on Ford and Mia while they kissed as if they were alone rather than surrounded by family.

In the end, however, Ian knew it wasn’t really a choice. Not only was he slowly starting to accept that Ford really was treating his sister the way she deserved to be treated, but the woman beside him drew him like no one else ever had. And even if he should have been focusing on protecting his sister and reconnecting with his brothers, Ian hadn’t yet figured out a way to stop himself from losing the thread of anything but Tatiana whenever she was near.

“It was nice of you to help my mother out in the kitchen.”

Tatiana’s answering smile had Ian feeling as though the football had just nailed him in the chest, right in the spot where he’d been so certain nothing would ever be able to touch him again.

“I love your parents. They’re so easy to be with, and to talk to. I can’t imagine how any of you kept anything from your mother when you were kids.”

“It wasn’t easy,” he agreed. And yet, just as he’d kept the finer details of his marriage and divorce from his sister, he hadn’t talked to either his mother or his father about the situation, either. They all loved him, just as much as he loved them, and he knew how badly they all wanted him to fall in love again, to marry again, and hopefully to have kids this time around. There was no one he wanted to disappoint less than his family. So since he couldn’t give them what they most wanted, he believed it was better to keep his own counsel on the reasons his marriage had gone so wrong and why he wouldn’t make the mistake of going that route again.

“I think I may have just shared my biggest secret with your mom, actually.” Tatiana ran a hand over her skirt in what he was starting to realize was a slightly nervous gesture. “And what’s really amazing is that I was only in the kitchen with her for a few minutes.”

As Tatiana stood beside him in his parents’ backyard, so beautiful that she took his breath away, Ian wanted to know all of her secrets. What did she secretly dream of? What did she secretly desire? And were her secret cravings as sensual, as desperate, and as endlessly hungry as his were becoming?

But he couldn’t ask her any of that. He could only say, “If you’re worried that she’ll give away your secret—”

Tatiana shook her head before he could finish reassuring her. “No, I’m not worried about that. Although I’m sure she’ll tell your dad, which is totally fine. In any case, what I really came outside to say was that dinner’s ready. I’ll go tell everyone else.”

He didn’t want to relinquish Tatiana to the attentions of his brothers again. But since he didn’t have anything to give to her, and he was pretty sure his brothers both did, Ian let her walk away from him...and toward them.

Tatiana found herself seated between Adam and Dylan at the dining room table, with both of them living up to their reputations as master flirts. She couldn’t remember another dinner where she’d laughed so much. Were it not for Ian choosing the seat farthest from her, and remaining almost completely silent during the meal, it would have been the perfect evening.

She was glad she’d stepped into the backyard in time to see Ian playing football with his brothers. She wasn’t at all surprised by his athletic ability. No, she thought with a little shiver of desire, she was absolutely certain that he did everything with both innate grace and strength. It was the joy she’d seen on his face as he played with his brothers that had her needing to put a hand on the French doors to steady herself.

All at once, she’d been able to see it so clearly—the expensive tailored suit gone and in its place, a football jersey streaked with mud and grass stains. She’d wanted to kick off her heels and dash out onto the grass to get in on their game, if only to be a part of Ian’s joy for a few precious moments. She still didn’t have the first clue how she was going to get him to change his mind about letting her shadow him, but she was hopeful that a brilliant idea would come to her soon. It certainly helped, in any case, to know that she had his mother’s seal of approval.

She also loved watching how sweet Mia and Ford were with each other. Every touch, every look they gave each other was laced with love. At the same time, it was clear to Tatiana that while they were a perfect team now, they had both remained unique individuals. Mia was full of her usual spark and sassiness, and Ford was still a brilliant and bold rock star, through and through. Tatiana was encouraged, yet again, that when people were meant to be together, even if they sometimes had a rough road to travel, things worked out in the end the way they were supposed to.

After they’d cleared the dinner plates and moved into the living room to dig into the delicious chocolate truffles that Rafe’s fiancée Brooke had made, Ian’s father walked in carrying a large bottle of champagne.

Standing by the fire where the family dog was snoring contentedly, Max said, “It’s been a heck of a great year for us Sullivans. First, with Rafe and Brooke getting engaged, and then, Mia and Ford finding each other again.” Max gave a warm smile to the man who would become his son-in-law and Mia blew her father a kiss. He popped the champagne cork and poured the fizzing liquid into the glasses Claudia had brought out, waiting until each of them was holding a full glass before raising his. “Tonight, I’d like to make a toast to Ian. We all missed you while you were living in London, and we’re very glad you’re back home.”

Ian hadn’t said much all evening, but even so, it was easy to see just how much he enjoyed being with his family. Now, as he smiled at his mother and father and said, “It’s good to be back,” Tatiana’s heart just about stopped in her chest.

Ian Sullivan had the most beautiful smile she’d ever seen.

Why , she thought as she stared at him in helpless wonder, didn’t he smile more?

The realization that his happiness already mattered so much to her had her hands shaking slightly as she reached out to clink her glass against the others’.

Though Tatiana had become accustomed to often being the center of attention over the years as her roles got bigger and her fame grew, she was glad for a big group to temporarily disappear into while she worked to regain her equilibrium.

Of course, that was right when Max said, “I’d also like to raise a toast to Tatiana for joining our family tonight.”

All eyes turned to her, and she wondered if she was as much an open book as she felt. Claudia, and likely Max, already knew how she felt about Ian. But could Mia, Dylan, and Adam see how breathless being around their brother made her?

“You’re always welcome here, Tatiana, and Claudia and I both hope you’ll consider ours to be your second home whenever you’re in Seattle.”

“Thank you, Max. Thank you, Claudia.” Her words thickened with gratitude for their welcome. “I’ve had such a wonderful time tonight. It really does feel like being home.”

“Don’t forget, I’ve also got plenty of space at my place if you need it,” Dylan offered in his charmingly wicked way.