Sophie Oak: Lost in Bliss

“God, that man is just hot as hell.” Nell’s mouth hung open. She slapped her hands across it as if she could push the words back in.

“Please don’t tell Henry I said that.”

“Your secret’s safe with us, Nell.” Holly winked at Laura.

It was always nice when Nell slipped a bit and proved she was wholly human. “He’s a yummy man, Nell. It just didn’t work out.” It hadn’t worked out between Wolf and her for several reasons.

Though they had a lot in common, they still felt more like friends than lovers, but Laura feared the reasons went far deeper for her. It hadn’t worked out because he wasn’t Cameron Briggs or Rafael Kincaid.

How could those two men still affect her all these years later? She’d told herself time and time again that she was over them, so why had she been unable to get them out of her head? Why had she seen them when Wolf Meyer had leaned over her and bent his head for a kiss?

“Ladies,” Wolf said, the word rolling off his tongue with lazy charm.

“Hi,” Holly managed to squeak.

Nell just waved and took a long drink of her tea.

“What’s up with you, Wolf?” Laura asked.

“Well, I was actually looking for you.”

“OMG! The dress is gorgeous. Brooke is a genius!” Jen Waters’s voice rang out as she opened the door to the Trading Post and glided in with Rachel Harper in tow. There was a sling around Rachel’s body, and a fat baby face peeked out. Paige Harper was the sweetest thing Laura had seen in forever.

But her momma did not look amused. “Nell, we need to have a talk.”

Nell smiled up, seeming to not see Rachel’s narrowed eyes or the flat set of her mouth. “I would love to talk to you, Rachel.”

“What the hell are you doing? Midwifery? Seriously?” Nell opened her arms as though ready to embrace anything that came her way. “Yes. I decided to study the ancient art of midwifery since it seems we’re having a baby boom in Bliss. I’ve tried to talk to everyone about population control, but I’ve given this a lot of thought.

I’m fine with you and Max and Rye having little Paige there. And Callie is having her baby with two men. If you all weren’t in polyamorous relationships, you might have had more children. So, I think I should help bring this new generation of human beings into the world as naturally as possible.”

Rachel kept one hand on her daughter as she stalked Nell. “Look, Callie is one of my closest friends in the world. She is one of the sweetest human beings I have ever met.” Nell nodded, her dark hair shaking. “I agree. Callie has a beautiful soul. Her aura is so pure. The shaman I’ve been learning from says a pure aura is so important.”

Beside her, Wolf snorted and then sat down, his huge body perched precariously on the delicate chair. “You’re learning to deliver babies from a shaman?”

“Oh, yes. She’s brilliant. So in touch with all the ley lines that run through the valley. It’s where she pulls her energy from. She’s from Del Norte, like you, Wolf.”

Wolf’s eyebrows rose on his face. “Are you talking about crazy Irene? She works at the Dairy Queen.” Nell waved off that little tidbit. “The universe leads us where it will. She’s recommended a home water birth for Callie’s son. Oh, and Rachel, she’s already had a vision of your daughter and Callie’s son.

Don’t tell Max, but they get married. And some guy named Charlie. I don’t know who he is.”

“I fucking love this place,” Wolf said under his breath.

Laura stood, ready to throw herself in front of Nell if Rachel started playing Mama Bear, and it was almost a sure thing at this point. Laura liked Rachel, but more than that, Laura understood Rachel. Rachel was the alpha female of her group. Rachel led her little tribe that included Callie and Jen. And Laura had found herself with Holly and Nell under her wing. Laura crossed her arms over her chest and sent Rachel a look, alpha female to alpha female.

“What do you think I’m going to do, Laura? I’m not going to murder her,” Rachel said with a huff. “Not when I’m holding my baby.”

“She’s sworn not to kill anyone around her baby,” Jen added with a serious nod.

Nell looked from one face to another as though trying to figure out where she’d gone wrong. “Don’t worry. I’m very prepared. The tub at Callie’s cabin is too small, so I’ve found a biodegradable kiddie pool that I think will work.”

Holly groaned as her head hit the table.

Rachel growled a little as she leaned in. “Look, Nell, feel free to prophesize all you like, but Callie is not having a water birth. She’s my friend, and I have to look out for her. I have been lying to her for months, and I will continue to lie to her because I don’t want her to be scared, but here’s the truth, Nell. Giving birth hurts. I mean it really fucking hurts. Oh, I know that according to Callie, Zane and Nate have seriously stretched out that whole part of her body, but I refuse to believe that Zane Hollister’s cock is as big as a baby’s head.” Rachel pointed to her daughter’s perfectly round noggin. “Look at that. Oh, it’s a little bigger than it was then, but not much. That came out of my vagina. And no one thought to lube her head up. You would think the way these men are in this town that someone would have a tube of K-Y on their persons, but no. No lube, Rachel. No whiskey, Rachel. No, you’re giving birth. You can’t have a hamburger. Callie’s going to the hospital. Callie is going to have drugs.”

Nell stood up, but didn’t move past the safety of Laura’s back.

Despite her sometimes out-of-touch-with-the-real-world nature, she had a healthy sense of self-preservation. “But women have been giving birth naturally for thousands of years.” Rachel had an answer for that, too. “Well, people have been crapping in the forests for thousands of years, too, Nell, but I don’t see you and Henry giving up your indoor plumbing. It’s called progress. When Callie goes into the hospital, I’m going to tell those doctors to put all the drugs they have into her epidural. All of them.

And don’t you even talk about a silent birth. There’s nothing silent about birth. It’s really loud. First there’s the screaming because of the contractions, and then there’s some man whining about me breaking his hand. That wasn’t what I wanted to break that day, let me tell you.”

“Hey, guys,” Callie said, a bright smile on her face as she made her way toward the table. She’d changed back into her street clothes, which included shorts and one of the new T-shirts from her husband’s bar. It had the Trio logo and sported a new “tourist friendly” slogan that the town council had informed all of the business owners in Bliss they must use to rehabilitate Bliss’s image.

Don’t worry about the murder rate in Bliss The wings are hot at Trio

“I bet the mayor loves that shirt,” Laura said with a genuine smile.

Zane Hollister was an asshole, but damn if he wasn’t a lovable one.

Callie smoothed her T-shirt over her belly. “Well, Zane and Nate don’t agree that we need to change Bliss’s image as a place where tourists get murdered.”

Holly leaned back, crossing one leg over the other. “Most of the murders that have occurred here weren’t our fault. Rachel had to kill her stalker. That shouldn’t count.”

“They count him as a tourist because he bought some fudge from Teeny,” Rachel explained. “And the guy Callie killed stayed at the motel. So did that Ivan fellow, who is the only one who killed an actual tourist.”

Callie tapped a foot against the floor. “And those other Russian mob guys weren’t in town long enough to buy anything before we killed them. They really shouldn’t count. I think the mayor is making way too much of that little tiny article.” It hadn’t been tiny. It had been a feature in Time Magazine wondering if Bliss, Colorado, wasn’t the most dangerous place in the United States to visit. Strangely, Laura had noticed it hadn’t really kept the tourists away. If nothing else, there had been an odd surge of thrill seekers, but the mayor and the town council were busily trying to refute the statistics.