Kieran Kramer - Dukes to the Left of Me, Princes to the Right

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Kisses and sparks fly equally fast in this fast-paced romp featuring second Impossible Bachelor Nicholas Staunton and Lady Poppy Smith-Barnes, a member of the Spinsters Club. Poppy won't marry unless it's for love, so she fobs off all her suitors with the story that she's on the verge of an engagement to the fierce and frightening Duke of Drummond, a product of her Cook's vivid imagination. Or so Poppy thinks, until she's trapped in an unwanted engagement with Nicholas, the
Duke of Drummond, who's just as mysterious as his fictitious counterpart and a true danger to even the most fortified Spinster heart.

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But looking into Poppy’s scornful eyes the night they’d ended their betrothal, he’d understood as never before that good things came at a price, a price he’d been unwilling to pay—

Until now.

He couldn’t fix everything, but he could do one thing right.

He was going to work on his relationship with Frank. He’d held his sibling at arm’s length all these years because Frank had gone from being a brother to a burden. Yet it certainly hadn’t been Frank’s fault that Nicholas had been charged by familial duty to nurture him to manhood in the absence of his parents.

Nicholas had chosen not to accept the responsibility gracefully. He’d been standoffish, all the while pretending Frank had been the one driving him away with his rude manners.

It wasn’t true, and Nicholas would have to rectify the situation immediately.

He found Frank in the same cheap hotel. His room was tiny and dim, and the wall was lined with stacks of small, empty kegs. There were a few more now than the last time.

He nudged Frank in the arm, and his brother jerked awake, bleary-eyed, roundly cursing Nicholas.

“You didn’t really drink all these, did you?” Nicholas pointed to the kegs.

“None of your business, you rotter. Go away.” Frank’s waistcoat was stained, and he smelled like he belonged in a barn.

Nicholas hauled him up. “Let’s go. We’ve got some talking to do.”

Frank grumbled, of course, but a few minutes later, Nicholas managed to get him outside. “We’re going on a walk,” he said. “And to get something to eat and drink. But not brandy.”

Frank cursed him roundly again, but he stumbled alongside him.

Nicholas took a sideways glance at him. “I’ve been a bad brother,” he said low. “And I’ve come to apologize.”

Frank stopped in his tracks. “Wha’?”

“I’ve neglected you,” Nicholas said simply. “And I’m sorry.”

Frank blinked and looked around. “Am I dreaming?”

“Hey, Frankie!” a rough voice called out from across the street. “Here’s another!”

Nicholas turned and saw a swarthy cooper in his open-air shop, holding aloft a small keg. “She’s a beauty, ain’t she?” A bright fire burned merrily behind him.

Frank’s face lit up. “She sure is! How much?”

The cooper grinned. “A few more shillings than you have in your pocket, lad. Ask your rich brother for some more money.”

Nicholas squinted at the cooper, then looked back at Frank. Was there something special about that barrel? Why was his brother so excited by it?

And why would he want to own it?

“I’m not sure what’s going on,” he said to Frank. Now that he thought about it, there were no alcohol fumes emanating from the small kegs in Frank’s room.

Frank made an ugly face. “It’s none of your business.”

Nicholas grabbed his arm. “Listen to me, brother. I don’t want to hurt you. I want to understand you.”

“Sure you do. Dummy.”

Nicholas prayed for more patience. “Are you … are you saving barrels for a reason?”

Frank looked down and bit his lip. “I like them, is all,” he muttered. He wouldn’t look Nicholas in the eye.

“You like barrels.” Nicholas made it a statement.

Frank’s forehead was furrowed deeply, but he nodded. Once. Quickly.

This was all very odd, Nicholas thought. But interesting.

“Let’s get a couple of meat pies,” he said. “And we’ll talk about the barrels.”

“Hey, governor!” called the cooper. “What’s your decision about this keg here?”

“I’ll check back with you later,” Nicholas called to him, and made a motion with his chin for Frank to keep up. “I want to hear about barrels first.”

“All right,” Frank said in a surly tone, but at least the pucker in his forehead was gone. And his eyebrows weren’t two slash marks, either.

Progress, thought Nicholas, and for the first time in years, he felt a smidgeon of tenderness for his sibling well up in his heart. Just a smidgeon, though. Nothing more.

But still, it was something.

An hour later in a quiet inn, after the two of them had shared a simple meal of steak-and-kidney pie, ale, and a small pudding, Nicholas felt as if he’d just met a person he’d never known. Frank mumbled on and on about barrels. Their different sizes. The various woods used to make them. The great fire always going at the cooper’s shop.

He even chuckled when he told the story about how the cooper’s cheeks blew out every time he had to squeeze the metal hoops around the staves.

My God, thought Nicholas. The man wanted to be a cooper. He was probably born to be a cooper!

But who’d ever have considered it a possible future for the son of a duke?

No one.

Frank was a tradesman at heart.

“How would you like to learn the coopering trade?” Nicholas asked him.

Frank drew in his chin. “Me?”

Nicholas nodded.

“But I—I can’t learn to be a cooper.”

“Why not?”

“It’s hard work. I don’t know how to do hard work. I hate hard work.”

“Here’s the secret.” Nicholas leaned forward. “It’s not hard work when you enjoy it. Then it’s called fun. You might work long hours and get tired at the end of the day, but you’ll go to bed happy.”

“Happy?” Frank scowled.

“It can happen to you,” Nicholas said. “You can become happy.”

“Really?” Frank’s eyes cleared, and Nicholas saw something more than a surly wastrel looking out. “But what would Mother and Father think?”

“Why, they’d want you to be happy. And productive. You want it, too.”

“I do?”

“Yes. You’ve just been too angry to see it. I’m going to take you back to that cooper. We’re going to arrange an apprenticeship. If he says no, we’ll find another cooper. We’re not going to give up until you, Frank Staunton, are making barrels. You’ve got the brawn and you’ve got the brains. Someday, everyone will be buying Staunton barrels.”

Frank grimaced.

But then Nicholas realized it was actually a small, real smile. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen one on Frank’s face.

“But you’ll need to stop drinking so much,” Nicholas said, “and stealing spoons from White’s—”

“Oh, I’ll stop. I’ll be busy shaping staves,” Frank interrupted him.

“Good.” Nicholas grinned, happy to see Frank had barely touched his ale, he’d been so excited talking about barrels. “I can’t wait to see your progress. I’ll visit every week.”

“Will the princess come, too?”

“No.” Nicholas was firm. “I’m not going to marry her.”

Frank’s face fell. “But you have to. She paid me good money.”

“Where is it now?”

Frank shrugged. “I drank it away. And bought a fine, tall cask.”

“I didn’t see it in your room.”

Frank’s eyes bugged out. “That’s because…”

“What? Spit it out, brother.”

Frank sank low in his chair. “That’s because I bought it for the princess. She told me I’d better get her one to put Lady Poppy in and then send it on a wagon to the sea, where someone was going to place it on a packet to Australia and release her when the boat set sail. I have it in a special place, where no one can find it, in a small shed behind Lord Howell’s residence.”

“You’re joking.”

Frank shook his head.

“You were willing to kidnap Lady Poppy?”

Frank blew out a gusty breath. “No.” He had the grace to look ashamed. “I was going to tell you sometime. But the princess is scary. Like a witch.”

Nicholas knew exactly what he meant. “All right, then. Tell me the rest.”

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